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(AU & design belongs to @shelternmberone )
some men are made to suffer
You know what? So true. #toss him tuesday
I want to remind everyone that at some point bffs zuko and sokka were both ruling countries in their mid-20s and they probably had to go to a lot of important international meetings…but all they do is whisper dumb jokes to each other
There was a young man from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two
There once was a man from Verdun
There once was a man from the sticks Whose limericks stopped at line six. They were fine till line five Then they took quite a dive — But the problem is easy to fix If you just ignore the last line, it doesn't even follow the rhyme scheme oh god I've really lost control of this thing I'm so sorry...
There once was a man
From Cork who got limericks
And haiku confused.
There once was a man from the sticks
Who liked to compose limericks
But he failed at the sport
Because he wrote them too short
There once was a fellow named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan. When told this was so, He replied, "Yes, I know-- It's because I try to squeeze as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."
On Tumblr did lasses and lads Their way with fail poetry had. You're having your fun But you're fooling no one - It takes skill to do something this bad.
blondebrainpower
4th century CE Roman amber pins, found in 2020 at the feet of an individual who was buried in a large sarcophagus at a necropolis in the French city of Autun.
These are stunning pins, crafted with exquisite attention to detail and symmetry…but what’s even more clever about them is the material they are made out of.
Amber is ever so slightly “sticky” as a surface (which makes sense, since it’s age-hardened sap / resin). It can be polished until it’s virtuall glass-smooth, but when tucked into hair, or into the fibers of a woven garment, it will have just a tiny bit more friction, causing them to have that much more of a chance to remain in place. As a material for securing things, they are slightly better than metal and bone, if not quite as good as wood (which has a great deal of microscopic texture for hair, etc, to catch on and cling to).
Most forms of amber are very clouded from inclusions when it was still sap, and fractal from the pressures it underwent as it hardened over the aeons. To be able to find pieces as large and clear as these are makes them all the more rare. Unlike metal or bone (and somewhat like wood) these pins would feel warmer to the touch, and be more comfortable and comforting for the owner, while being less fragile than wood. And lastly, amber does have a faint scent as it warms up, making them a natural perfume source.
These are not cheap throwaway objects, folks. These are indeed treasured posessions, just as much for their functionality & multi-use offerings as for their rarity and beauty.
Reblogging for all that extra amber trivia because it’s fascinating
"Credit to the original artist" is not credit to the original artist
"Payment to the cashier", I say, as I haul a TV out the door of the Walmart
Customer Service Nai is the only origin story I accept for his hatred of humanity.
Drawing other characters: damn I always use the same angle Drawing ✨Hinata✨:
„What was the point of delivering all those messages if we didn’t end up saving anyone?”
Some angst for you all
i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it
Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”
Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”
*prolonged silence* “oh my…”
“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”
*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”
The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
padmedidntdieforthis
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.
saucefactory
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”
rowantheexplorer
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)
Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture
Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: don’t tell me how to do my job
Solkar, rubbing lip
gloss on his hand: don’t tell me
how to do my job
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
the lip gloss comment is my favorite and now haikubot found it
the lip gloss comment
is my favorite and now
haikubot found it
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.