Ziamafz

The Edge of Seventeen 2016

fell asleep while writing and

For anyone beginning office life!

This is the greatest thing

So wholesome,,,

Me: *listening to Bohemian Rhapsody* “THUNDERBOLT AND LIGHTNING VERY VERY FRIGHTENING ME!!”

My earphones:

I heard this post exactly how it demonstrates

Jason ‘I like to throw axes at bullseye’ momoa

Me, age 7: what do you mean a midnight snack? You mean you woke up at MIDNIGHT just to eat??? That’s so weird!

Me, 18, making a fruit salad at 2 in the morning: h

we should thank god super powers aint real

what if somebody teleported they nut inside you

ain’t that how Jesus was born?

Start the year off better

Her little sister is trying to pronounce the word “who”

LMFAO

WHO DID THIS TO ELLIE

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina” Cast Spill on Their Roles

me: *tries to concentrate*

my last three brain cells:

Porn blogs still posting porn until December 17th is the equivalent of the band playing while the Titanic was sinking.

some ppl who grew up with siblings didnt rly Grow Up With Siblings. like if you and your brother are 10 yrs apart u just dont get it… if you had siblings within 3yrs of your age you had the genuine experience of primitive undeveloped human brains pummeling the shit out of each other because none of us have developed frontal cortices and the laws of man don’t apply in the confines of this house

me hitting the submit button on an essay, knowing that it’s nonsensical garbage, to an academic who has dedicated his life to this field

how to be a winner

This is so important

bruh 👏🏾😂.

Home girl boutta schmooze her way through college

ranessence tantrummm

That discussion board one actually works. Got an A in that portion of my Senior Sem doing that. This is gold.

@thesickestsinner

This is her calling. You can DEFINITELY use the same hacks at your job with a few tweaks here & there!

Literally this is how I’ve survived 3.75 years of college. This is gold. This is truth.

Passing college like a Slytherin………I love it

It’s fucking red.

I’ve literally waited for this video for years. i’ve been reading the gif in the wrong tone the entire time

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

No, no no… you identify bone from rock or other substances by touching it to your tongue. If it sticks, it’s bone. The taste itself has nothing to do with it. And most archaeologists won’t lick human bones if they know they’re human.

…and I realize that doesn’t actually do much to prove archaeologists aren’t freaks.

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them

this is beautiful

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

sometimes it just ends up being something like

ITS BACK

lord 

Y’ALL NEED JESUS

Please stop reblogging this post

This post made my water break

In honor of my daughter’s first birthday next week, I’m sharing the post that made me laugh so hard that it broke my water.

WHAT