MateWhatEvenIsThis

i choose to believe 30smth year old house saw THIS newly divorced wilson and thought 'honestly, i'm trying to hit that' and bailed this mf out of jail

ftms passing tips in like 2015 used to be ‘make sure you choose a name that’s common! That way it wont seem like you chose it youself!!’ and nowadays an average ftm meetup will have dudes named like. forsythe quincy and circut breaker and its 10000% better this way

oh hey, someone put that thing i was mad about yesterday into words!

I couldn't agree more with OP here.

excellent point by tumblr user zaxal

I wonder how many people had their sexual awakening/BDSM discovery moment while watching Harry Houdini’s act. There was no way everyone went for only entertainment’s sake. Edwardian young man staring up at the stage aghast as a beautiful sinewy man struggles and contorts himself to escape his binds, his own face reddening and thinking “Good heavens, I AM a sodomite.”

So the CONTEXT is that Xbox is releasing Diablo IV and they changed their logo to match that, BUT I'm CACKLING over the idea that Xbox decided 4 days of pride was enough and that the gays should burn in hell now

imagine if aliens found the dead body of a human being exploded in the vacuum of space and they started making fun of the mutilated corpse calling it “splatter alien” and saying it was the ugliest alien in the whole galexy. and then made stuffed animals of it to sell to their alien kids. that’s what happened on this planet to the blob fish

fight the slander. post pressurized blobfish

still a bit of a weird looking cunt if I'm being fully honest.

being autistic/adhd is also having NO voice regulation like you think you’re using your regular voice but someone tells you to keep it tf down and you’re like ??? and then other times you’re trying not to be loud and become whisper-soft and nearly tremulous whaaaat

step 1: SLAP a fucking BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS directly onto the wound IMMEDIATELY to stop the bleeding

everyone sit down i found the original 

tidy wires are less of a fire hazard =)

Peer reviewed tag from @queerkhazad

A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

oh shit my laundry

reblog to save someone’s laundry

“minor character death” but not death of a minor character, just a character experiencing a non-major death

I made this post with Danny Phantom in mind and that’s what most of the tags have been. I wasn’t surprised when I saw some anime-lookin names, Merlin, and some version of Robin. I’m upset I didn’t see this coming

Loving Vincent (2017) dir. Dorota Kobiela, Hugh Welchman

Bruce has the most extravagant presents for Clark. Who wouldn’t want the huge cake with Superman and Clark Kent-shaped candles?! 

‘i had a new rose invented and named it after him. what a heterosexual gift.’ - bruce, fooling no one

so funny when someone is like "look at my pet wolf. he is half arctic wolf and half timberwolf 🥰" and the animal in question looks like this

"well huskies look SO MUCH like wolves it's really hard to tell them apart"

uh huh

cannot stop thinking about this skit from the new i think you should leave season

what the hell

Drew this at work just cause I thought it was cool.

staff's getting a little too silly for their own good. they think they're our buddies. "oh look we put another silly thing on your dashboard teehee" get rid of the fucking bots