(=￣ ρ￣=) ..zzZZ

possums ???? why they look like that (shape)

BREAKING NEWS: more shark attacks during shark week because they all think we’re saying ‘shark weak’ and it upsets them

I got my heart broken and I survived, I failed 3 courses in university and graduated, I got rejected in the very first job I applied for and got promoted yesterday, I went through hard times with my family but then two years later, we laughed our hearts out over lunch, The closest friends disappointed me several times but I made new friends and loved them with all my heart. I did it once, I can do it again.

I NEEDED THIS SO BADLY

This. This everyday. I need this everyday.

Sweetheart ❤️

some book of mormon cosplayers just came to my house, i quickly slammed the door in their face

wait is mormonism real i thought they just made it up for the musical

“Ahh, Perry the Platypus! Behold: the INFINITY GAUNTLET!…. Inator. With one snap of my fingers as I collect the sixth stone, I will have infinite power, enough to…. create more resources for the entire planet! They will WORSHIP me as a hero, and I will take over the ENTIRE TRI STATE AREA!” “What? Kill half of all people? What kind of crazy person would do that?”

“You see, Perry the Platypus, when I was growing up, my parents only let me eat half of all my meals.”

gays just pop more severely and that’s that!

I feel like not enough people know that totally fucked was originally played with a harmonica

If you could Bluetooth link my mind to a speaker this would start playing

this sounds like a prison song or something what the hell

I don’t throw around the phrases “the worst thing I’ve ever made” or “abomination before God” very lightly, so believe me when I say this is both of those and also a mistake

I present to you Mr. Sandman, but the opening clapping is uncomfortably meaty and plays throughout the whole song

THANOS OUT HERE STEALING HEARTS, BEING A TRUE VILLAIN

Someone take away his Instagram. Please.

How the fuck is this guy better at memes than everyone on this site

Josh Brolin is an absolute treasure.

hot take: jake peralta is bi and john mulaney plays his ex boyfriend from high school in season six of brooklyn nine-nine

john mulaney plays a rockin’ twink

John Mulaney: *to himself* What would Leonard Bernstein do?

Captain Holt: *to Jake, quietly* I support your and Amy’s relationship with my whole heart but why on earth would you give up a man like that

I don’t even go here (just like… my toes) and I want this, specifically with all these tages from @bosstoaster

#The episode would be Amy getting jealous not of John and Jake but that he has so many interests in common with Holt#So she spends the whole time trying to win back the Captain#Meanwhile Rosa is on a warpath at Jake#Because she told HIM about her sexuality and stuff and had EMOTIONS#And he didn’t tell HER#How DARE he

“look, it’s not like i hid anything, it just never came up!” 

“You called yourself out for ‘straighsplaining’“ 

the whole bi thing goes completely over charles’ head and he keeps getting really aggro like “oh you and jake were real close huh?? too bad, sucker jake is MY best friend!” 

everybody else is like “charles no” 

at the end john mulaney turns out to be the embezzler they’ve been looking for

The only way Jake Overshare Peralta, Jake TMI Peralta, Jake Heart-On-His-Sleeve Peralta would fail to bring up the fact that he is bi, is if he himself were oblivious to the fact. 

Come on @morthils this isn’t Gina Linetti we’re talking about. Stay in character.

The only way Jake would have had a high school boyfriend and not told Amy and Holt is if Jake himself did not realize that this dude was his boyfriend.

He would describe the relationship to Amy and she’d be like, “So you guys were dating” and he’d be like “It wasn’t like that that” and she’d be like:

:|

and Jake would be like, OH MY GOD. I HAD A BOYFRIEND IN HIGH SCHOOL. WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME THIS.

Lots of “practice kissing” was involved.

Jake’s mom is absolutely That Overly Supportive Parent with the bumper sticker and the flag who never actually like, talks to her son about it.

“I just thought she was really liberal!”

THINGS SONY DID: THAT

Holy crap, this isn’t a fan edit.

My look is attractively ambiguous. Am I cute? Am I ugly? You don’t know . You need a second opinion .

Imagine being able to detach your titties before bed.. so you could actually sleep on your stomach. Lol

My dumb ass gon over sleep and forget my tiddies in the morning..

Keys … wallet… damn, my titties .

The perfect use of this damn gif 😂😂😂😂

 For you 

You are beautiful.💗  You are strong.  You are important.  Everything will be okay in the end.  Don’t give up on the person you’re becoming .

(if you want, show/tag someone to let them know they’re not alone and they are going to be OK )💖💗

Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

English has a lot more words created for very specific phenomena! It’s not just rick-rolling. Language is always evolving and it’s super interesting! Here’s a list of hyper-specific/untranslatable words in English.

Murder at Disney

If Edna dissed me like that I’d have to throw my whole self in the trash out of shame.