"What a week..." I say for the 179th week in a row

I really want to run a gimmick sideblog but I don't have any special talents that I can think of, encyclopedic knowledge of any subject or any hyperspecific interests that would be funny enough. I just wanna be part of that world. Any tips or suggestions?

Is it normal to mourn the loss of one's wheelchair?

A fun thing about my university is that the floor of all the outdoor areas is made up of big stone slabs that are deceptively uneven. Add to this the fact that I am a reckless driver who loves runnin' around at the speed of sound on my wheelchair and you end up in all sorts of awkward situations.

Sometimes I'd drop all of my things by braking too hard and have to pick them back up myself because movies lied to me about love. Other times, I would be rolling by myself and fall in a quiet part of campus, which would spare me the shame of being perceived by other people. I would jumpscare my friends constantly by moving beside them one moment and falling to the floor in a cartoonishly loud fashion.

I'd trip up while going at a reasonable speed (for once), which thankfully wouldn't be enough to send me flying off. But what this means is that often some unsuspecting fellow student walking to class would lock eyes with me as I desperately tried to rebalance myself like a tightrope walker on a ten story building in an amazingly tense wordless exchange that would alter the course of both of our lives forever, before I "regained my footing" so to speak and continued on as if nothing happened.

Having learned how to "fall with style" by diligently stacking it multiple times a week over the course of my life, the best (and worst) is when I would be going full speed amidst a crowd of people and have my wheelchair stop dead in it's tracks because it got caught in a crooked bit of floor. The sheer momentum would carry me several feet through the air. And somewhere in the middle, I'd know. People would turn to me in shock and horror and I would look at them for a split second with an expression on my face that said " * record scratch * Yep. That's me. I bet you're wondering how I got in this situation" while I was in midair. Then I would expertly land like a stunt double, only lightly scraping my knee, bending my elbow and banging my head on the stone floor

Continuing my series of Misadventures in Disability (this title needs work), one of my wheelchair's well... wheels has been getting all wobbly and threatening to fall off at the slightest provocation. The manufacturer operates strictly on an appointment system, and there hasn't been an opening for the last two days. So I've been either staying put or shuffling fearfully everywhere, hoping I don't wipe out and cause a scene.

I hereby submit my proposal for a Wheelchair ER - or rather a Mobility Aid ER -, a place where these situations can quickly be resolved by experts (who'd ideally also take house calls) and users don't have to get bogged down by availability and can get back to speeding along and doing sick tricks on the streets and sidewalks

Does writing a novel centered on a minor character that appears in only one chapter of a modern high-brow classic, which deals with the themes of death, the passage of time, generational curses, the creative process, and humanity's instinctive drive to create and build community and be kind to each other count as fanfic?

Finally got around to updating my tumblr description because it felt like having to introduce myself in school, and suddenly forgetting everything about myself. Who, me? I've never met them in my life

I might not have this whole tumblr thing figured out just yet, but last night I had a conversation with @duolingo-unofficial (in German, no less), so I guess the migration is going pretty well