malec scenes that impacted 18 yr old in denial bisexual me a great deal: (2.18) where the alec furry allegations began
Source: nosfelixculpa
do you ever just in the middle of reading a fic start smiling like a fool because it's so well written and for a moment it feels like you're actually there, in the story and you only realise you've been smiling after a while and it feels really nice in a way
malec scenes that impacted 18 yr old in denial bisexual me a great deal: (2.18) where the alec furry allegations began
Source: nosfelixculpa
sometimes i think about tk’s little head tilt he does when he looks at carlos
I headcanon that one of TK’ s favorite things to do is sit on the counter in the loft. He hops up there and lets his feet dangle and talks Carlos’s ear off while Carlos cooks. Carlos half heartedly tried to stop him when TK first moved in but at this point has completely given up and secretly loves it just as much as TK does. He comes and stands in between TK’s legs at various points and lets him taste whatever he’s making. Domestic bliss.
28 for Tarlos? 💞
28. Forehead touches or nose nudging or any soft variation on the theme
There’s a fizzing under TK’s skin that’s making him feel like he might burst out of it. Not in a bad way; it’s the buzz of anticipation, of something new, something good.
He has to remind himself to breathe as Carlos moves infestimally closer, the palm of his hand warm and large against the side of his face, Carlos’ fingers curling around the back of his neck.
TK looks at Carlos’ lips, pink and perfectly formed and plush then back up to his eyes, so dark and beautiful, framed by thick lashes. Eyes that look so fondly at TK that it makes his stomach swoop. He licks his own lips and catches the way Carlos’ eyes dip down to track the movement.
Carlos leans in and rests their foreheads together, his eyes closed. “Hi,” he murmurs before taking a breath, as if he wants to savour the moment.
“Hey.” TK nudges his nose against Carlos’ nose.
He’s so desperate to kiss Carlos, he loves kissing Carlos, but he doesn’t want to break the magical spell that seems to have settled around them, slowing time down and narrowing all the wonders of the universe to this moment, to just the two of them, sharing breaths.
They’ve shared a lot of kisses, since that first time. Desperate kisses, hard and claiming and full of passion and lust and want; the occasional chaste kiss goodbye. But nothing like this.
Carlos’ lips sliding against his are pressing gently against his own, slowly coaxing him to open his mouth with the delicate swipe of his tongue against the seam. TK opens to him, like flower petals unfurling and reaching for sunshine. He wasn’t ready for this, for the way that Carlos’ lips would feel against his own, the way Carlos would melt into him, when kissing wasn’t just a stop on the way to more.
This kiss though, this kiss is the entire journey. This kiss says I like you and I want to be with you and maybe even, you make me happy. This kiss makes TK’s heart feel three sizes too big for his chest and that terrifies him because how can he possibly have this, with someone like Carlos?
He pushes the questions away and lets Carlos kiss him and kiss him and kiss him until his lungs ache for air and his lips are numb and when they break apart TK can’t help but smile.
“Hi.”
It’s only taken me slightly shy of forever to notice that this photo lives in their bedroom, as per the scene when Owen packs for TK after Gwen’s death.
So 3x13 just dropped on UK Disney+ and I’m starting my day with a little light angst. And it struck me that all the way through season three it was always TK walking through the loft door: Carlos was always home, TK was just joining him there. We saw them walk through it together in 3x04 and after that it was (and is in the rest of the season) TK walking through that door, coming home to Carlos. We had that visual over and over, letting us see and know that TK is home, and is always coming home to the man who’s always been there for him.
Except in this episode when Carlos came home to find TK with the photo albums. In this moment it’s Carlos coming to TK, it’s Carlos meeting TK where he is, even if that is a little stuck in his past and drowning in his feelings. For the first time since the Tarloft we have Carlos walking through that door to TK. TK doesn’t come to Carlos here, Carlos comes to TK. He sits with him and doesn’t push the conversation, he sits and listens as TK talks about his mom and then the call and he sees - maybe for the first time he really sees - that this isn’t something he can fix.
Carlos came to where TK is and he saw where he is and in that moment Carlos understood that he can be the most important person in TK’s life but he can’t be the only person.
TK made the decision in 3x04 to come home to Carlos. But seeing Carlos come home to him in 3x13? No wonder Ronen says this is the moment that TK realised he was going to marry that man.
I am stuck on the “breathe, breathe”. I’ve been stuck on it and I just cannot stop thinking about it. how can anyone? no, because listen. tk just woke up from a honest to god coma. he doesn’t know anything. he’s probably tremendously confused, scared and in his fair share of pain. and yet his eyes fixate on carlos in 0.2 seconds. and what does he do right after? he notices he is not breathing, so paralyzed by fear and self-doubt that nothing of him is moving and tk sees it, because he's so aware of him it’s more reflex than conscious thought. carlos doesn’t have to utter word for him to understand what he’s thinking, where his mind is going, and how to fix it and pull him back. they are so unbelievably seen by one another, so attuned to each other’s presence. they love each other so much, and tk knows it before he knows anything else. he just regained conciousness, merely a brush away from death, and -- and. his hand is for him to touch, to take. his head is his to kiss, if he only were to come closer. and his first words are for him, ready and willing and almost desperate in offering the reassurance he so fiercely needs. the world just came back into focus and carlos is already at the center of it.
Okay I love how in the pilot engaging is a big gesture to save a relationship that TK probably unconsciously senses is becoming distant and then in the season 3 finale he’s engaging without a ring or any fanfare just because he’s so in love and feels so safe in his relationship that he doesn’t want to waste any time. He’s finally learned that the power of love is not in the grand gestures but it’s in the day to day moments like putting your hand through your lover’s hair as he tries to sleep and just being glad to have him there.
i firmly believe that when carlos goes to owen’s house to get tk’s stuff mateo takes it upon himself to reassure him that tk did not have any gentleman callers at the house during the breakup era, he mostly just went to work and then came home and cried himself to sleep. carlos just blinks at him and mateo sighs and says ‘these thin walls are no joke, man’
“I can’t even hold your hand.”
Yes that broke me. But for all the people I see saying “yes you can, it’s right there,” while I get where you’re coming from (believe me, I really do) I disagree. Yes, physically he can, it would be really easy. But does he know if TK wants to be touched by him? We don’t know what happened. We don’t know the circumstances. What we do know is who Carlos Reyes is. And that is someone who would never push a person’s boundary. So unless he is absolutely, 100% certain about where he and TK stand he’s not going to initiate contact. Even if it is killing him to not have that comfort, to not feel the touch of the person he loves one more time, he wouldn’t unless he knew for sure it was alright with TK. And he can’t know that, so he’s going to stay at arm’s length, because that’s a part of who he is.
okay wait like tk seeing carlos’ goodbye in his dream makes his moment of waking up so much more impactful because here he is, waking up and telling carlos “breathe breathe breathe”—after he himself was INTUBATED—because he knows how hard and overwhelming all of this has been for carlos. because if there’s anything tk knows for sure he knows carlos reyes down to his bones and he knows how this man feels everything so hard and keeps things bottled in until it’s just about to burst and even after all they’ve both been through tk is here telling him it’s okay. he can take a deep breath for the first time since nancy called him to the icu because the worst is over now. he can let himself go and feel what he needs to feel because tk’s here and he’s not going anywhere and carlos listens to him because tk’s awake and okay and he’s not going another second with them being apart.
inevitable discourse sight unseen i’m just gonna say: it’s incredibly fucked up for carlos to go behind tk’s back, buy a place they had seen together and passed on because tk couldn’t afford it, and put both their names on the deed! it’s also fucked up for tk to panic and bail in a way that leaves carlos feeling heartbroken instead of talking it through! they both handled it poorly!
that’s GOOD WRITING. that is EXCELLENT writing, totally consistent with both of their prior characterizations. carlos has been shown, over and over, to be someone who plays his emotions/intentions close to the vest and tends to make decisions for both of them and then get upset when tk doesn’t respond the way he wants. tk has been shown, over and over, to be someone who responds badly to the feeling of being cornered or thinking he’s about to fuck up something good and so he does it preemptively (the fact that “gwyn” calls him on this shows you that he knows this).
i am fucking thrilled that their break-up absolutely made good, characterization-consistent narrative sense. and it’s perfectly reasonable, especially given the genre constraints of a weewoo show, that tk’s near-death experience put things in perspective and led them both to forgive and forget and move on more quickly than they might otherwise have done. this is all amazing work and i can’t wait to see where these Idiots In Love go next
RAFAEL SILVA and RONEN RUBINSTEIN onstage at the 2022 Outfest Legacy Awards - October 22, 2022 | via Out Magazine’s IG Stories
It’s pretty simple to understand wille’s need to be with simon, he quickly became the person closest to him and the one who made it possible for him to bear the unbereable. It’s not that easy to empathize with simon’s same need instead, because to run away would be the easiest “way out”, get to know someone new, go on with his normal life.
I think this is exactly what markus’s presence will be there to portray, the breath of fresh air in simon’s already complicated spot. But it’ll most importantly reveal that simpler does not necessarily mean it is the right choice to make you happy or what love is supposed to feel like.
Simon’s “i’ve been thinking about you all break” to wille is a raw and heartfelt confession. It speaks for itself. I bet it was truly nice to have space, but some things never change as his mind coming back to him. He let wilhelm know it, for all the honesty and care simon has within and openly shows, his need to be present because he simply cares too much to not be.
It’s always been in their darkest moments that feelings took over and they learned how to grow stronger together. The second season will be the manifesto of their love and i’m so ready to witness it.