@yoursmokesignals / yoursmokesignals.tumblr.com
God can you imagine if Donald Trump became president? There’d be like a new bubonic plague and he’d be like “idk drink bleach about it”
Throwback to when I took acid for the first time in 2013 and predicted the events of 2020 like the fucking oracle of Delphi
Holy shit
I recently started working in hospitality, and I’ll tell you guys right now, the trope of “there was only one bed” is not as rare as you’d think in real life. A few times a week, at least, I have guys come in who are working together on projects in town or passing through who have to literally book the last room I have available for the night and lo and behold — there is only one bed, and guess what, they give each other a side-eyed look and begrudgingly take it. So write it up, it happens all the time!!!
Never let your There Was Only One Bed dreams die. I was secretly in love with my best friend for over a year when she graduated and moved to Oklahoma (like 1000 miles away) for grad school. Between that travel restrictions, we were so scared we’d never see eachother again.
At the end of summer, when Covid numbers were at a lower point, I took the risk to visit her in her new apartment and I quickly realized that, unlike when I’d spent the night at her house before, the couch wasn’t made up like a bed. She explained that since her new couch was so fancy and pink, I couldn’t possibly sleep on it, and so I needed to sleep in the bed with her. You know, out of necessity. I woke up with her snuggled around me in the middle of the night.
We’re dating now, and I genuinely think I’m going to marry her. Just the other day, though, I mentioned that if she hadn’t been weird about her fancy couch, I probably never would have like confessed my feelings. AND THEN she stood up, took the cushions off the fancy couch, UNFOLDED IT INTO A HIDE-A-BED, and said “I KNOW.”
THIS GIRL. ORCHESTRATED. BED SCARCITY. JUST SO SHE COULD MAKE THE “ONLY ONE BED” EXCUSE. Y’all when I said I just about lost my goddamn mind, I just about lost my goddamn mind. I love this sneaky bitch so much and the moral of this story is BE THE ONE BED YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD.
Fanfic imitates life, and life imitates fanfic. It’s full circle really.
oh my god
there was only one bed
but it was STAGED
I love this so much
New Fanfic Trope Unlocked!!!!!
AU:There was only one bed - by design👀
Fake dating or only one bed?
Fake only one bed
THE TROPE HAS LEVELED UP
I don't want a fucking job I want to be that elegant woman you see studying in the library all day with her cat and a cup of coffee, pouring over ancient texts with a maddening half-smile on her face.
being able to teleport must suck ass when you have adhd
“why the FUCK am I in nevada”
being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit
why does this have 85K notes
because we reblogged it instead of cleaning our [x]
There are not enough hours in the day; how am I supposed to go to work AND read AND draw AND sew AND write AND stay up to date on all the tv people tell me I should watch AND scroll endlessly through tumblr and expect to actually get anything accomplished. I call bullshit on the entire concept of time
#they are 20 year olds talking about a smartass 15 year old boy that bullies them.
GUYS I JUST SAW THIS ON TWITTER AND I AM DYING
Add the author’s reply, cowards!
I scrolled through the notes on this post and my favorite has to be one mockingly accusing Madeline Miller (a Latin and Greek teacher with a Masters in Classics) of needing to do research and she wasn’t a real writer like them.
Anyway when I read that line I immediately understood what she was trying to say.
Articles mentioned (I think, anyway…)
Honestly, the first time I saw this tweet, I laughed my tits straight into the ocean.
I know what ‘olive skinned’ (and thus variations on it) means, but the author taking the time to have a little laugh, acknowledge that it’s at least a bit funny, and drop some knowledge is appreciated.
And a double thanks to the person I reblogged from for linking the articles.
Vampire: *Bites my neck to drink my blood*
Vampire: Stop moaning, you’re making it weird.
shakespeare wasn't lying that tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow can creep in this petty pace from day to day
neither was Smash Mouth. the years start coming and they don't stop coming
#How Eddie became my favorite character with only 42 minutes of screen time
I love you, man. I love you, too.
Steve & Eddie co-parenting Dustin in Stranger Things 4
↳ bonus
the fact that we need 8 hours of sleep is ridiculous we should only need 4 and the other 4 should be used to be cozy in your bed and rub your legs together like a cricket and listen to music and think about your little scenarios
