good morning to women above 5’7, men below 5’5, bisexuals with clear phone cases, girls that hated the color pink growing up but like it now, college students ignoring academic emails, high school students that are cheating in all their classes, ppl who own too many candles or mugs, lesbians that had a crush on their best friend, ppl who have never watched one piece, ppl that don’t drink coffee or tea, girls that wear false lashes, men that wear chapstick, ppl that were dinosaur kids, and last but not least ppl who play as yoshi in mario kart

ppl who think that saying “I love you” to someone a lot makes it lose it’s meaning are so boring literally what could make you think that? if someone tells you they love you like 3 times in an hour it means that 3 separate times they were sitting there and thinking about you and how wonderful you are like. smh. say I love you to everyone that you love as often as possible bc sometimes it’s easy to forget that there are people who love you

BTS’ FIRST IMPRESSION OF EACH OTHER: “WHY IS THIS DUDE NAKED??!!!”

| Cr twt tr sebyul Gifs @mimibtsghost

Jk: the first thing i noticed about RM was his t h i g h s

i got a college degree and the thing i’m most proud of producing in the process is a full academic presentation about what makes a himbo

this is the only important thing i did in four years

saying “sorry im out of it today” as if im not like this all the time is my fav lie

Scottish sculptor Rob Mulholland creates creepy mirrored sculptures out of acrylic glass that makes them blend into their surroundings until your perspective shifts and they suddenly catch your eye. Source Source 2

imagine getting lost in the woods and coming across these

on a scale of 1-10 how ready for death would you be

i didn’t know chaotic evil looked like someone’s dad from north dakota

x

— outro: t e a r

Thor about to demolish the entire battlefield by electrocuting every bad guy in a 20 foot radius: vibe check

"You can't change nature." "Change is nature." is kind of a raw line to be from ratatouille

the fuck is a resume bitch give me the job

Ain’t that the vampire baby from Twilight?

This is funnier than any joke told by 90 percent of the comedians out there

The older I get the more fiercely protective I get of younger girls. I was heading into work yesterday and I saw that 12 year old (I mentioned her before, the one who wore makeup) talking to this older man. She’s normally really bubbly but she looked a little more subdued talking to him so I go over and loudly say “Hey sweetheart, who’s this?” And the guys just glares at me and she says “oh um his name is Justin.” And I’m like “Hi Justin, how do you know her?” And he gets nervous and is like “I just saw her jogging and thought I’d give her pointers.” So I just kinda tilted my head and looked at him for a minute. He literally asked me “are you a cop or something? I haven’t done anything wrong.” So I took her to the McDonald’s near by, bought her something and had a talk about not talking to strangers. Low key I’m debating the next time I see her parents (they drop her off at the gym and leave her there for hours) to maybe have a talk with them or something. Idk if it’s my place tho

Just to add because some messaged me saying that I was being a nosey bitch: so a woman who used to go to my gym (and my same university. Like I used to see her at my job and on campus) actually went missing not far from my intersection (literally a 5 min walk away from the major intersection) on may 10 and they found her body literally last week (June 19). Everyone has been on high alert lately so when I saw this random dude talking to this little girl, my brain immediately went into defence panic mode. So yeah call me nosey if you want

This world could use more nosey b*tches.

I’ll stop being a nosey bitch when males stop being predators

Always be a nosy bitch where young girls are concerned. Always be a nosy bitch where creepy old men are concerned

His first reaction was to go on the defensive and ask if she was a cop. HE WAS UP TO NO GOOD AND KNEW IT. That girl he was talking to was 12. TWELVE.

Be a nosey bitch til the day you die. No regrets.

This has happened to me before when I was in college at a frat party. This girl comes squeezing herself in between me and my friend and throws her arms around me. “Amanda, I am so glad you decided to come!” I was so confused and just figured she was drunk and mistaked me for someone else, until I saw the panic on her face. She leaned close and whispered that a guy was following her, was certain that he had put something in her drink and if I would please play along. I looked behind her and sure enough, some creep was watching her like a hawk. We invited her to hang out with us the rest of the night and even waited until her ride showed up just to make sure she was safe. Always look out for each other!

If you ever feel scared like this just come up to me like we have been friends since kindergarten, call me any name u can come up with ill play along.

Stay together, stay safe

Perfect advice. I’m reblogging this as a guy, because first of all, if you”re a guy : DON’T DO THAT. Don’t be that creep.

And if you’re a guy and you notice some creep is following or stalking a girl, and that she’s obviously uncomfortable or panicked, go ahead and say hi, long time no see, pretend to be her cousin, and tell her discretly you noticed there was a shady guy. Ask her if something’s wrong, if she feels unsafe, if she wants your help (very important - she may not trust you enough, no one could blame her, don’t take it personally). (and don’t you dare take advantage of the help you offered for a flirt opportunity, that would make you no better than the creep)

We can all stop “witnessing and do nothing”, and set an example.

Alternative option for a guy: if you feel safe doing so, go up to the creeper who’s following her and be like “hey WHAT’S UP bud do you like SPORTS? My favourite team is the redsox what’s YOURS my man? What you DRINKING dude that looks GOOD.” and be friendly and just loud enough to blow his cover. Draw attention to him and see what he does. He won’t feel as safe creeping if he knows people are looking at him, and maybe he’ll leave. It also means the woman won’t have to worry that you are *another* creeper she has to be wary of, and you may distract the bad dude enough to give her a chance to lose him.

Reblogging for that last comment.

Last week I joked that my very cerebral, retired-police-chief-grandpa is basically Holt from Brooklyn 99 and then today someone said, “damn, we’re out of decaf” and he just deadpans “well there’s no need to get hysterical.”

Yesterday he said “if you need to insult the same person twice you’ve already failed in your goal to devastate them”

My Yaya was trying to remember the name of a guy who stole money from her in high school today and my grandpa instantly pipes up “his name was Bernie Ryan and he was a scoundrel”

i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

Wtf????

Smoove with it too 

This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

“Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

reminds me of this gif

Baseball players are to be feared

Reblogging for the last one

^Same for me

They just kept getting progressively more “woah”

much woah

Oh my god this is a lucky universe

every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”