Man - featherless biped
Woman - opposite of a man
Conclusion: the definition of "woman" is "feathered quadruped"

Behold, a woman

Man - featherless biped
Woman - opposite of a man
Conclusion: the definition of "woman" is "feathered quadruped"
Behold, a woman
I wanna dance but I don’t have moves???? Like an ABSOLUTE bop will be on and I have just enough inspiration to hop into the spotlight and then. And then that’s it. I ran out of moves.
…it’s like trying to write a speech with no proper vocabulary??? :( I am illiterate in the art of dance
Ladies and gentlemen. mothers and fuckers. guys, gals, and non-binary pals. I stand today to present to you:
The holy grail of American childhood.
You are a werewolf trying your best to live peacefully among humans, but your SO has just proposed to you with a ring of pure silver. You genuinely love and want to marry them, but you also have to somehow get out of accepting this ring.
Imagine you plan this HUGE romantic thoughtful proposal and everything’s gonna work it’s all gonna go right and you get down on one knee and-
and the response is-
“I’m allergic”
Humans eat the muscles of other animals to get bigger muscles
*gymbro zombie voice* gaaaaaAAAAAAAAIIIIIINNSSSSSSSS
I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF
This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.
Reblogging because it’s a damn potato and I want to encourage people to assume potatoes are magical.
Magic magic magic potataooooooo~~~~ ✨
Reblog if you would still study for knowledge if exams didn't exist
Wiki rabbit holes 24/7, babyyyy
you ever find a piece of clothing and feel like you just stumbled upon an essential bit of your character design
If it’s a fedora, RUN AWAY
the AU we never knew we needed
*paints eyes on eyelids*
*gets specialized dentures with extra teeth*
i had an epiphany yesterday and had to make a rushed powerpoint about it.
Do you know any games that are sort of like reality TV shows? Any type of show will do - whether Survivor or The Bachelorette or MasterChef or Real Housewives or This Old House or Fear Factor, I want to know what's out there!
THEME: Reality TV.
Hello friend! I had a lot of fun reading these games. I hope you do too!
Amorous Island, by tucksravin.
Welcome to Amorous Island, where your auras shine bright and your loves loom large.
This is a couples therapy, crystillian reattunement, auric cleansing, and tantric wellness retreat. Your Parent somehow missed that first part about the couples, and brought you here as an early birthday gift. A three month early birthday gift (they never remember the date) but that was fine.
You were enjoying the water and the Sun. And while this crystal crap isn’t up your alley, the Guru isn’t so hard on the eyes and is definitely into you. So, up until now, that too has been fine.
What’s not fine is that your one deepest love, your greatest regret, your Ex has just shown up.
With a new Lover.
Each player will choose one character from the cast - will you be the Protagonist, who wants to fix everything? The Lover, who’s an absolute cinnamon roll but blurts out everything? Or the Guru, who depends wholly on their totally perfect sense of auras to read everyone?
Amorous Island is the perfect set up for a romantic reality tv-show gone wrong. It’s not necessarily a reality tv-show, but you don’t need to do much at all to make it one - as characters all here on a retreat for couples, with pre-established connections to one-another and plenty of reasons to want to stir the pot, you have a bubbling dish of drama just waiting to be served.
Welcome to Imaginary Friend Fight, the no-holds-barred gameshow where we pull impossible people from imaginations throughout the multiverse and pit them against each other in a desperate fight for existence.
The most popular program in the multiverse is The Event. Entities are ripped from their reality to compete in strange challenges. The winner receives an Existence Package allowing them to permanently exist in the Alpha-verse (a coveted existence nexus). The losers are erased from existence entirely; their loved ones will no longer remember them. The Event is being held in a giant stadium filled with beings from throughout the multiverse.
Imaginary Friend Fight is a one-page, rules-light game for 3 or more players. One player is The Host, the entity in charge of The Event. The other players choose any character in media (or maybe your own TTRPG characters from other games!) The Host will choose 3-5 challenges for their Contestants to compete in. These challenges might be things like "bake the most delicious cake" or "get the crowd to cheer the loudest for you." Each Contestant is given points based on how well they performed in the challenge. At the end of The Event, the Contestant with the most points wins!
This is a great game to incorporate characters from different games into one setting for a goofy game, or even as a side-story for your characters in whatever game you’re currently running. What your characters do could be simple or silly; the author references the game show Taskmaster as inspiration. If you want a game where none of your players need to take anything seriously, and the GM wants a place to put whatever ridiculous competition they’ve had stewing in their heads for weeks now to the table, this is exactly the game for you.
Get ready, get steady, bake! In this game, join your friends in creating your own episode of everyone's favorite comfortable, bingeable reality television show. Will you rise like your expertly-made dough or collapse like a sad souffle?
The Fabulous Folkish Baking Programme centres on a group of people in the pursuit of baking glory and perfectly flaky bottoms. This rules-light, role-playing focused game is ideal for either folks who are getting gently folded into the world of tabletop role-playing games for the first time, or veteran gamers who just need an easy gaming break before their chocolate splits for good. The only crunch this game should inspire is the crunch of a(n imaginary) well-baked baguette as a bread knife slices into it. Delicious.
This game carries different phases of game play as well as character interviews to allow the different contestants to air their grievances, talk about what they’re making, and express their reactions to criticism or praise. Interviews can also have an effect on your player’s performance - if you do well during the Interview stage, you may get to adjust a future roll in your favour.
If you want a game that leaves your mouth watering every time you play it, try out The Fabulous Folkish Baking Programme.
Cryptid TV, by yanahn.
A plague of Reality TV stars has descended upon the sleepy town of Mountain Lake ready to hunt down (and capture on camera) anything that looks even remotely like a cryptid - your crew is among them to cause drama, fake hoaxes, and enact sabotage beyond all reckoning.
The catch? You have only a passing familiarity with eldritch world of Showbiz, also you are all SPOOKY CRYPTIDS.
Will you succeed in your chaotic endeavours or will you be lured into a life chasing the fleeting mirage of fame? - Play on to find out!
Cryptid TV is a 3-5 player TTRPG where you play cryptids out to sabotage the dark designs of Reality TV. It is a hack of Honey Heist by Grant Howitt inspired by childhood memories of TV shows about river monsters and cryptids.
This is less about what you see on the screen, and more about what’s behind the scenes. Your players are all trying to sabotage a reality tv show without being caught or selling out to Hollywood. It’s short, it’s easy, and it’s a complete blast.
It’s all come down to this. You’ve all endured weeks of stress in a strange environment. Cameras have been in your face constantly, and producers have kept asking you to explain your thoughts and feelings. You have been judged constantly, but you have been found worthy. The end is in sight, and the prize is almost yours. There are other people who have gone through all of this with you, and you are all after the same thing. But you’re not here to make friends. You’re here to win.
Not Here to Make Friends is a tabletop roleplaying game to let you play out an episode of a reality competition television show. Cooking competitions, dating shows, performance contests! Whatever wringer you want to put people through, this game can do it.
This is a game in which you get a say in what exactly your tv show is about. It could be anything from drag to survival, in any setting. Are you bounty hunters in the galactic frontier, racing to find elusive bounties? Are you elves looking for love? It’s up to you.
The game does require a bit o design from the players. You will need to come up with 3-5 traits contestants will need in order to compete, preferably ordered into an acronym. (The acronym is more important than the accuracy.) You’ll also choose from a list of contestant tropes - are they all about drama? Always laid back? A huge fan of the show?
This game also includes staples of reality TV, such as the Talking Head segment, where they explain their feelings and motives to a camera, as well as Jury, where producers will secretly vote for a contestant to win. If you like caricature characters, picking up multiple roles, and the petty over-competitive atmosphere of reality tv, this is a game to check out.
Big Chef Energy turns a reality tv style food cooking competition into a ttrpg! This is a cooperative team role playing game. Choose your recipe, collect your ingredients and work with your fellow chefs to cook up the best meal ever for the Judge! The rules are quick and light for easy pick up and play sessions. Each session is fast and exciting with the optional tension of a time limit for each round.
If you like games like Iron Chef, Master Chef, or Chopped, this is the game for you. Each session is a cooking episode, with its own theme and constraints. Players will move through different sections of the competition, rolling to see how they fare, dealing with consequences such as injury, incorrect equipment, or cross contamination. At the end of the Presentation state, the Judge (or GM) will ask questions of the contestants, editing their score based on how their efforts meet the criteria. The session ends when the Judge declares a winner.
If you like a game with competition and if you like Caltrop Core, the system this game is designed on, I suggest checking out Big Chef Energy.
In the footsteps of the (in)famous cable reality shows and streaming amateurs who have come before, your team of Investigators explore haunted locations in search of the supernatural and unexplained in the hopes of becoming internet sensations! It should be easy, right? A few ghost boxes, a rosary, a Ouija board and some nightvision cameras should make for some great viewing, right? And who knows? Maybe you'll actually capture some photos that could conceivably be argued as evidence of ghosts.
Of course, the ghosts might have something to say about that...
Using the Breathless game system from Fari RPGs, lifeLESS attempts to emulate all of our favorite ghost-hunting TV programs and popular indie video games like Phasmophobia and Conrad Stevenson's Paranormal P.I.
This is less a game about reality tv and more about a reality tv show gone wrong. You are wannabe tv show hosts, venturing into a haunted location with the hopes of making it big. Unfortunately, you’ve chosen a location that is very much haunted. Your characters will be uncovering clues and dealing with Stress, attempting to make it back to Base Camp in order to recover and resupply in between each venture. There isn’t really a mechanic involved to replicate the tv-show aspect of it, but there is a Celeb character class that can really let you ham it up for the cameras if you so desire.
When you run out of wholesome baking shows to marathon, play as your favourite baker personality in this GBBO-inspired mini-RPG.
With themed recipe challenges, secret ballot voting, and guided mad-lib recipe generation, whip up wild and wacky bakes just like the baking competitions.
Using an original RPG system, Ready Set Bake is ideal for roping in family members and friends who aren't familiar with RPGs but love baking and cooking shows.
This game is directly inspired by the Great British Bake-off. Characters have three skills: Preparation, Bake, and Presentation, which they will rank from -1 to +1. Since this is a Caltrop Core game, they will roll d4s to determine how successful (or unsuccessful) their attempts are.
For the Game Master, or Host, there’s a table to determine the theme of the episode, an outline of how to play out a recipe, and a tracking aid to help you keep track of how each contestant is doing. Character creation is simple and to the point, and the game so clearly knows what it is that it shouldn’t be difficult to teach new players. If you have a group of Bake-off fans, or you like describing delicious desserts, check out Ready. Set. Bake.!