Invest in Yourself...

my friend was testing perfumes out at the store and she sniffed a bottle and anounced "ngl this bitch kind of sucks" The girl at the counter suddenly looked really sad, and my friend was like "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking about you." And the girl looked up and said "No don't worry, I didn't think that, but I just crushed a ladybug with my shoe" We both took a peak over the counter. she'd stepped on a red m&m

I think the hot new trends for this summer should be reading comprehension and critical thinking skills

not now kitten, daddy's about to have a mental breakdown from seeing the prices at the grocery store

this getting 20 notes in under a minute... we need to start killing the government

it’s so insane we have to just keep showing up for work. no matter what is happening globally, locally, personally, you’re supposed to show up and act like the formatting on a report is actually really important and demands your attention.

Abény Nhial

Today’s card is: A 3x5 index card

My boyfriend prefers his mattresses firm, and I need a soft mattress. He prefers his food temperate while I like my food hot and spicy. This is another good reason to not have a kid, because even if the kid averages out and prefers everything in the middle, there's the risk of some blonde bitch breaking into our house to rummage through our stuff.

my middle aged client going off about kids these days and how they have such a different childhood and back in the day kids used to have real experiences like how she and her girl friends used to practice kissing on each other and now kids just sit in the same room in silence on their damn phones. hey ma'am run that back real quick

oh im down bad for this bow dress by helsa studio