When I was little I wanted to be Italian REALLT badly bc I loved the movie cars and specifically had a crush on this fucking THING

Which doesn’t speak English at all, all it’s line are in Italian and it’s name is GUIDO. And everyone knew I was obsessed with Italy in elementary school but they didn’t know why bc I, even as a young autistic child, had the sense to know this was a rightfully so, highly mockable thing. So I would read about cars on IMDB and then one day someone posted a crackfic on the message boards there and it was about this guy getting drunk and beating his wife, and it snapped me out of my fugue long enough to realize how absurd wanting to be Italian was, but then it made me cry really hard and my parents were like ‘hey what the fuck’ and I didn’t have the chutzpah to admit anything so I told them I saw a naked lady online and then they went into the computer and found all the weird south park midi songs I downloaded on lime wire and I thought they were literally going to kill me for about two weeks.

The reason I was downloading South Park episodes and songs on limewire and frostwire was because I was also obsessed with Kenny McCormick and for school we had to make a shitty little website about a world issue, so I found this free platform that doesn’t exist anymore but it was like a horrible little wix site from the mid aughts, and we based my groups theme on global warming. But when we were done with it I repurposed it as a perosnal site and lied about being a voluptuous blonde 19 year old woman who worked at a fictitious restaurant called the lunchbox, and I just wrote about how obsessed I was with Kenny McCormick and my sister found it and was like what the fuck is wrong with you. But she never told my parents. She also found this 80 page story I was writing about buddy the elf and all my weird skater ocs breaking into the moulin rouge, and at one point I was sick of buddy so I had a herd of buffalo trample him in the middle of a city and it was very tragic but jarring and unexpected. And she referenced a part of the story to me and it made me SO fucking paranoid that I wiped our entire, family shared packard bell computer and got in huge fucking trouble for it.

My Girlfriend Recommend An Amazing Bag To Me……

Last week my girlfriend recommended a handbag for me. The time she told me that she found a super cute bag and it is a must-have bag for girls, I thought SHE WAS CRAZY! Honestly, I cannot remember how many items she has recommended to me.

But this time I was pleasantly surprised by the design and quality of this bag! It can be both used as a handbag and crossbody bag with an adjustable strap. It has super large capacity with so many pockets to hold your cards, lipstick, brush, phone, Ipad or notebook. With the chic design and large capacity, this bag is perfect for date, shopping, school, work and street snap.

➷ Cannot Wait to Get Yours? Click here

20% OFF coupon code： tumblr-Feb04

Let that man go

Parents: HOORAY! You’re 21 now! Let’s go for your first drink!

Me: OH BOY MY FIRST DRINK!!! CAN’T WAIT!!

its dem boys………..

what if you went outside and saw slender man what would you do

tobey maguire or andrew garfield 

i thought this said spider man please ignore me

no way in hell am i passing this up

a student from uni scrolled past this and ended up failing all of his courses, even the ones he thought he passed… not gonna take this chance.

yall like “I wanna die” like a broken record but a buncha clowns come over wanting to kill you and youre all shitting your pants. hypocrites you are

the day i let fuckin bozo stab me to death is the day i die, pal

well yeah thats how being stabbed to death works

dont make fun of me dude what if a girl sees this

i love it when youre drinking citrus drinks and you cant feel your tongue and your entire face starts sweating its so cleansing

my doctor said im allergic to citrus

me, 80 years old with osteoporosis: I’M WEAK 😂😂

why do people say chicken as a term for coward? Have you ever meet a chicken? Cause those things will fuck you up man

hmm 666

6+6+6=18

18….

Obama was 18 once

very scary

not sure what this information means

GOSH

mY GIRLFRIEND IS JUS T REALLY BEAUTIFUL AND CUTE AND WONDE RFUL?

I LOVE HE RR. .. …… . .

Finding Masculine Clothing in the Women’s Section

Kai says:

I have parents who only let me buy clothing from the women’s section, so I thought I would compile a list of places I know you can find masculine clothing in the women’s section for all the other transmasculine people who might be closeted or have parents like mine! If you know of any I’ve missed, please send an ask to my personal blog kaikev

Note that some of these stores/brands may be more expensive than others if they aren’t on sale. I also apologize in advance if these stores are not accomodating to plus sized individuals; I don’t have any experience with that and if anyone has suggestions for additions to these lists, please tell me!

Button down shirts/flannels:

T-shirts:

Pants (I recommend chinos because they tend to be less curve hugging and have bigger pockets):

Shorts (these are hard to find in the women’s section unless you can get athletic shorts):

Jackets/Hoodies/Sweatshirts:

Formalwear (specifically blazers/suits. If you’re looking for button down shirts, see the section above as well):

Shoes:

Swimwear (rash guards and boardshorts):

Binders/High compression sports bras:

I hope this helps! Please feel free to send me more suggestions if you come across anything helpful - this post will probably be edited to add more links so check back every once in a while and reblog again for your followers and for updates!