Cyrus: [starts to have fun]

Cyrus: “the fuck is this??”

If you ever catch me staring, I am:

1) admiring your piercing/tattoo/hairstyle/outfit

2) trying to figure out if I know you

3) think you’re gorgeous and can’t help myself

truth

4) just staring into space and haven’t realised I’m staring at a living person

they gon smooch,,,,,,,

“Sir, I can has fish?? Thank you, kind Sir!”

Translation:

[weasel? comes up to a fisherman]

Fisherman: Friend, what do you want? [weasel sniffs at a closed bucket with fish] Hungry for some fish, aren’t you? Maybe I should give you a fishing pole? Eager beaver. Let me open it. [weasel is busy digging under the bucket. fisherman gently pokes it] Hey, there is a lid up here. Come on, pick any you want. [weasel grabs a fish and runs away] Hey, no “thank you”? Well, you’re welcome. 

I’m NEVER going to get tired of watching Russians interact with wildlife

Man, this is adorable.

“You need to believe in things that aren’t true. How else can they become” - Hogfather, Terry Pratchett

it’s seasonal lads

IT’S SEASONAL AGAIN LADS

The USPS is the fastest, cheapest, and most accurate mail service on the planet last I heard, and is the biggest employer of veterans in the entire country. 

On top of that, mail carriers:  -have wages that top out at over $30 an hour (and their wages go up in predictable steps based on how long they’ve been with the USPS) -have excellent benefits, including a shit-ton of vacation time, plus a pension, and they can retire after thirty years

But they also have one of the oldest, biggest, strongest unions in the country. That must piss off Republicans so much. 

Also, side note: they take zero taxpayer dollars. They’re entirely funded by postage. 

(”But I heard they were doing terribly!” They’re not. Congress saddled them with pre-funding their retirement 75 years out to intentionally put them in the red and make them look bad. I’m not joking or exaggerating. There’s tons of info, but here’s the USPS’s own info: https://about.usps.com/who-we-are/financials/annual-reports/fy2010/ar2010_4_002.htm )

wow. i can’t believe tomorrow is christmas.

hey fucker. i made this post the day before halloween. you’re not supposed to actually reblog it the day before christmas. it was supposed to be big jokes but now this post has no meaning anymore. i will wipe you off the face of this earth

you have no power here, fool.

two greek artists paint some vases

greek artist 1: hey so i’m painting a child right greek artist 2: yeah greek artist 1: so they’re basically like tiny men right?? greek artist 2: yeah pretty much

greek artist 1: okay so you know how you told me to paint a guy riding a big cock because people like that greek artist 2: yeah? greek artist 1: i’m not sure i did it right greek artist 2: what do you- oh. hmmm

greek artist 1: hey when women plant gardens what do you think they like to plant greek artist 2: dicks, usually greek artist 1: oh

greek artist 1: alright so i’m doing this battle scene and i was just wondering, what do soldiers usually ride into battle, is it horses or greek artist 2: dolphins, actually greek artist 1: even if they’re foot soldiers? greek artist 2: yeah

greek artist 1: hey so like how should i show Achilles’ extreme grief tho

greek artist 2: make him a burrito

greek artist 1: but-

greek artist 2: burrito

#1380. (Modern AU) When The Kids In The Car Are Chanting "McDonalds! McDonalds! McDonalds! McDonalds!"

“We have food at home:” Fi, Lana, Marin, Ruto, Zelda *Pulls into the drive-thru, orders a single black coffee and leaves*: Cia, Fierce Deity, Ganondorf, Ghirahim, Impa, King Daphnes, Midna, Volga, Yuga Joining in on the chant: Darunia, Link, Linkle, Ravio, Wizzro, Zant

As if Zant wasn’t the one who started the chant

decided to turn some of my various headcanons into icons because why not :v

Guess who has a new Mastodon icon?? I’m humanish@queer.party btw

someone please get me off this site

I am CACKLING

okay im going through the rules and stuff on matsodon rn and

sexworkers are good here as long as what they post is tagged. the gore thing is :// but like the person said sexworkers are supported here.

all of this. all of this is hot as hell. 

they actually have specific rules disallowing pedophiles and nazis+the terfs from the last screenshot.

dogpiling and harrassment and stalking is listed as a no go thank fucking god??

there is not one specific staff account as each member of staff has their own thing so it’d be most likely easier to get in touch with them

and the best part

a peek at the list of blocked domains?

ive legit been on this site for ten minutes and i feel safer on this site than ive ever been on tumblr. again im not like, leaving tumblr but this place is nice as hell.

the site itself is https://mastodon.social/  and im @extinction on there lets get this bread in a safe and orderly manner gays

btw this is okay to rb so more people know how sexy this place is

I just started looking for groups and such, and I already love the site! It’s straightforward and is really neat! Check it out, y’all!

“extra crunchy peanut butter” has the same syllable count and rhythm as “teenage mutant ninja turtles”

Extra crunchy peanut butter

Extra crunchy peanut butter

Extra crunchy peanut butter

Eat it in a sandwich

Peanut power!

Hey, look, an XKCD comic! His license lets people put stuff up, but if anyone wants more, it’s at xkcd.com

For everyone’s information:

The plan for the 17th, when the adult content ban comes in, is to protest.

To do that, we are making as much noise either side of the 17th as possible, and using the site as normal.

On the 17th, dead silence.

People are saying log off but what they really mean is don’t open the site or the app.

But, on the 17th make as much noise as possible on every other platform. Tweet about it and post on facebook and instagram and everywhere else.

What this does is causes a massive dip in ad revenue for one single day. That does not make staff think ‘oh everyone’s gone let’s shut down.’ What it actually makes them think is 'oh shit people aren’t happy and if people don’t keep using our site we’re out of money and out of jobs.’

A boycott reminds a company that the users (consumers) have the power to make their site (business) worthless with one single coordinated decision.

If you want to join in, here’s what to do:

Remember: the execs don’t care about anything but money. Shutting down the site means there’s $0 further income from it. That’s their last possible course of action. If we make it clear we’re not happy, they’ll have to do something or we can do more and more until it becomes too expensive.

Protests take commitment. They’re a defiant action against a business that is doing something wrong. They will try to scare you into not participating, because they’re scared. We hold all the power here, sometimes the execs just need to be reminded of that.

Please Help Me Save My Dog

For those of you who follow me you probably know I got a puppy recently who I named Honeydew (this is her the day I brought her home)

(And this is a picture of her from yesterday)

I got Honeydew to be my ESA (emotional support animal) after encouragement from my therapists, psychiatrist, and family due to the fact that I have had issues with mental illness and behavioral problems since I was 6 years old (I am now 18) and animals give me a lot of relief from the symptoms and stress caused by this. When I brought her home everything was going great, I had a healthy, active, and happy puppy, that is until this Wednesday morning when I woke up to her being lethargic, vomiting, and refusing to eat. I took her to the vet, and she was a healthy weight and even a bit large for her age, she was alert albeit still lethargic and the vet told me it’s probably parasites/worms or it could be parvovirus (a very very very serious and fatal virus for puppies) but she was optimistic that Honeydew was just suffering from an upset stomach due to worms/parasites and gave her deworming medication but told me to get in touch with her immediately if her symptoms worsened. The next day Honeydew was back to her normal self, she was active, eating, and playful (though she still had some diarrhea) and because of that I let my guard down assuming the issue was resolved. I was wrong.Yesterday morning(friday) I woke up and went to check on her only to be greeted by clear vomit and diarrhea everywhere. She was again refusing to eat but not too lethargic, regardless I called the vet and made her an appt for their soonest availability, cleaned everything, and went to school for a few hours. When I got home I went straight to check on her and she hadn’t pooped or vomited so I was hopeful it had subsided, I, again, was wrong. After about 10 minutes I noticed how skinny she looked, as if she hadn’t eaten in weeks (I encouraged her to eat but she refused so I have made attempts to feed her I didn’t just leave her like that lol) and not even 5 minutes later she vomited blood three times in less than 10 minutes. I immediately called my vet who told us to call the ER who told us to come in ASAP so less than 25 minutes later we arrived and were rushed into an examination room. Honeydew was extremely dehydrated, and tested positive for parvovirus which the ER vet called lovingly referred to as “Ebola for puppies”.

I had the choice of having her hospitalized so she could have around the clock care which would have costed me well over $2,000 or I could try to take care of her at home for a (somewhat) more affordable price. I had no choice but to treat her out-patient since I have no way of funding her hospitalization which dropped her chances of survival from 80-90% to about 65% IF my care for her is PERFECT with absolutely 0 mistakes. The thing is I cannot afford her treatment at all, I’m a full-time college student working night shifts part-time and had been relying fairly heavily on my savings for the past 2 months due to my hours at work being cut down by more than half. She needs frequent vet visits to survive this and I absolutely can’t afford this. I had money saved for her standard vet visit where she would get vaccinated etc. but I never expected anything like this to happen. The ER visit cost me $420 that I don’t have and she’ll need to see the vet multiple times over the next 1-3 weeks which will probably put me out another $300-400+ that I don’t have. 

I wouldn’t do this unless it was a last resort which it unfortunately is. She wants to live so so so so bad even the vet said that the fact she responded and tried to struggle against being poked with all those shots they gave her was a good sign. Watching as she struggles to raise her head, struggles to drink water and watching her try to walk and almost being unable to breaks my heart in a way I can’t explain. How she went from a happy go lucky baby girl to a fur covered skeleton in 24 hours absolutely baffles and devastates me. I’m doing my absolute best to be on top of her medications and giving her subcutaneous fluids but if I can’t afford to continue her treatment there is a very very good chance she will die.

I am begging you please please please donate if you can, even just $1 would help. Please help me save Honeydew  

(link to Honeydew’s GoFundMe)

I’m boosting this. Help save the puppy!

Loyalty that surpasses the stars. I have a lot of feelings about space and Laika  Patreon

Laika should be reverred as a sacred entity honestly. As with all the animals we have sacrifieced for human acheivements.

more of botw link’s personality because i didnt feel my last post on it was the cream of the crop. hes so funny

@staff Everyone that reblogs this, is against the ban on adult content, and we are strongly requesting that it dose not get put into place.

If you agree we the above statement, comment your blog name.

kinky-kittenmaw.

Iamnotadamnedmonkey

scp-l4-clef-alto-001

yahimnotposting

The cup has a warning label on the side- do not allow contact with a dead body.