Let’s Discuss: Gaara’s Shyness/Anxiety, Part II - “The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly”
Welcome to Part II of this Let’s Discuss! In the first part, I talked about the hints of Gaara’s anxiety in order to get others a better understanding of who this character is. I hoped to have cleared out at least some of the befuddlement over Gaara’s “personality change”. (I put this in quotes because if you take away his anger problems, Gaara has always been shy. The fear of rejection in combination with his heart being ripped to shreds made him into a cold, hostile jerk.) If not, I highly recommend you to read it. For this post, I will be divulging “The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly” parts of Gaara’s shyness and will follow it up with a few brief additional notes to illuminate some specifics.
However, before we start, I need to clarify on a few things. I stated in my first half of my discussion that shyness was once a trait essential for pure instinct and survival for both humans and animals. It is still used to help us think critically over the positive and negative consequences in life and decide which person or group to trust that will benefit us in the long term. However, does that mean that all shinobi in the Narutoverse are generally shy? No. Inhibition is rooted off of anxiety and continues regardless of whether the individual’s life is seriously in jeopardy. Life-and-death missions would make anyone feel nervous, but if handled right, it can help them prepare for any disaster – it does not guarantee that they will make it out alive, but the chances of survivability are higher when they make good decisions, plan ahead, and work together as a team. Shikamaru, for instance, is a coward yet has always been a deep thinker and would usually find his way out. He is never the type who liked to get involved in conflict, though he would not hesitate to help those in need such as Chouji, Naruto, and to some extent, Gaara and Sasuke. Shikamaru was named after a deer, but he is definitely not timid or shy at all. When he is not in a life-threatening situation, he is generally laidback and is not too worried about how he is supposed to act in public.
There are some ninja that are quiet and introverted, though they also have no concern with “fitting in” with the crowd and are even genuinely okay with being alone once in a while. Sasuke, for example, has the passion and ambition to avenge and honor the Uchiha name. He had no interest in making friends and believed that hanging around with comrades would hinder his true potential, though he knew that needed to be with his companions because Team 7 had once proven to him that when he was with them, it was easier to bear the pain. In fact, he was on his way forward to a better life until his older brother, Itachi, came for a “visit” in Konoha. He felt powerless when he could not fend for them when he fought Gaara and again when he was unable to protect Naruto from Itachi. He figured that since he was not able to protect his friends or his family, there was no point for him to stay around Konoha any longer. He then took the fast, easy route out to obtain power that would be utilized to kill the person responsible for the Uchiha massacre. It was guilt, pride, and his inferiority complex rather than bashfulness that pushed him away from Naruto and crew.
As aforementioned, bashfulness associates with anxiety, but the nervousness goes onward even when the danger is nonexistent. Shyness occurs when a person feels awkward and is unsure how to act around other people even though he/she wishes to fit in with the group. A shy person’s reactivity is high to negative outcomes like pain, fear, sadness, rejection, humiliation, and criticism, and he/she responds either by submission or reinforcement, i.e. hard work for better results. People like Gaara feel that every social interaction must go perfectly in order to be accepted in the group and they try to avoid/prevent any mishaps by any means possible. What confuses some folks is that a lot of Gaara’s shy habits were not that apparent – it had mostly to do with him being on missions almost every time he is on screen. Even when he is not fighting, he rarely makes his “weakness” obvious. However, Gaara and people like him treat social interactions, life-threatening or not, as if they are missions and tests to try to “prove” their worth. Remember, he does not have much of a social life outside of battling. Gaara’s character centers his desire to be accepted and valued by everyone. The thing that separates Gaara from some shinobi is his natural sensibility. While he does not have a mutated gene, possess the eyes of the Sharingan or Byakugan, or come from a clan with animalistic traits like Inuzuka (dogs) or Aburame (insects), his senses come strictly from isolation, overprotection, abandonment, and the number of times the shinobi tried to assassinate him in his childhood. His hyperawareness is useful for his survival skills and can extend to his social skills such as reading people’s mannerisms and listening to people’s conversations and problems – attributes that he never thought to use or believed he had.
“The Good” (Shyness that benefits Gaara):
- tendency to think before he speaks (Gaara’s pauses and “eye blocking” tic), plan ahead to avoid unnecessary conflict and embarrassing mistakes; selective with words, has a sway with people; capable to deeply reflect on his actions and learn from his mistakes
- “the power of silence” = gives people their undivided attention to the quiet person speaking, “you” are in control of the room
- anxiety actually gives him the extra push to fight off the pain when a problem arises, the courage and power that he never thought he had rather than give up, gaining confidence little by little
- detail-oriented, observant, looking before leaping; spots things that are easy to miss
- Gaara and shy people in general are loyal friends and the type of people you could always rely on
- sensitive, empathetic listener, mindful; has the mentioned qualities of a leader as opposed to the loud and aggressive types who like to hear themselves talk
- sensibility allows him to slow down, review, and appreciate the little things in life like how he was able to easily see the negative aspects
- healthy amount of anxiety = more alert and better prepared, anticipating the worst possible case; better performance in school, sports, speech, etc.; tendency to make better decisions to prevent from making a grave mistake
- imaginative, creative, resourceful, a great problem-solver and peacemaker
- forms deeper friendships to a select group of people, cautiousness narrows down to a few (“quality over quantity”)
- his ambitiousness, the desire to be productive so he can be a part of the group, the aspiration to improve and succeed
- usually humble about his strengths and talents
- the will to be strong for others as that would make him feel at ease, would prove to be a valuable member to society; help himself keep away from the spotlight, attention should be placed on others; “fake it ‘til you make it” – masking his outwardly nervous tics so that it would not cause other people to be alarmed, especially since he is a leader
- shyness can actually be an endearing trait, shows more of his “human” side such as awkwardness, humility, gentleness, and empathy; a display of “vulnerability” makes him more approachable; a mysterious cloak breeds wonder and curiosity
- has survivability value: social Darwinism, existentialism, risk vs reward, fight-or-flight response, etc.
Additional notes: Most of the listed positive traits are seen from Gaara post-Naruto. Of course, that does not mean that he did not have redeeming qualities before. First, Gaara has always been deep in thought as evidenced in his reading ability with people and his value of existence speech. Since he had no peers to talk to growing up, he became much more introverted and introspective; his words are rich in depth and could make an impact on others whether it was to sound intelligent, intimidating, or to persuade people that he was serious about what he says. He made himself bigger than he actually was to fend off some of the potential predators who stand in the way of his goal. Secondly, Gaara wanted to ensure that his battles and missions are a success. He once made Sasuke’s dead body to be the ultimate goal to prove his “value of existence”, and he would not stop until he gets the results that he needed. Moreover, he believed that no one would accept him for being so spineless and weak, so killing Sasuke was the way to prove his “honor”. Anything short of that would mean certain death, or worse, being rejected. That was why he went all-out on him and later, Naruto, in full Shukaku form. (Fun fact: Humiliation and rejection, to some people, believed it to be worse than death. There were several surveys that enlisted public speaking as one of the top common fears – even surpassing death – due to the sheer dread of being rejected. We actually see Gaara do a speech in the War Arc. He, initially, did not say anything because he did not want to make a fool out of himself like he has done in the past. Plus, he knew that failure was not an option.) Gaara has never been the type to idle for too long. If his fight with Rock Lee taught him anything, it was that life will come at him fast with opportunities that he could easily miss if he were to continue to dawdle in his cocoon on “what ifs”. He has the power like no other to save his comrades. If he were to otherwise delay and feel sorry for himself, then he would have even more reasons to be depressed for simply not acting sooner. The companionship that he just gained from his peers could soon be dead in seconds if he does not react quickly. Additionally, Gaara’s nagging anxiety actually reinforces him to make better decisions. Before his fight with Naruto, he never lost to anyone in his life, let alone got injured from anybody. He never felt the need to reevaluate his strategy or social life since there was no one daring or strong enough to stop and teach him a lesson about life and rewards and repercussions. Losing to Naruto was actually a blessing in disguise since now it forces him to think critically of his actions before repeating the same error. He realized that he nearly blew his one chance to genuinely become good teammates to the ones he already has. His defeat also proved that fighting for oneself to gain strength was counterproductive.
You may have noticed that I included a statement claiming that shyness can be seen as a charismatic trait. But why? Gaara was once shy and sweet to the people and they have rejected him before! What was the difference? Suna’s idea of a monster was someone who was short-sighted and self-serving. Monsters have immense power and cannot possibly experience pain the way humans could. Furthermore, they are the kind of creatures who could not be reasoned with because of their lack of emotional capacity and intellect to feel like humans. Back then, Gaara was unable to control his power or emotions because of his selfishness and the lack of company and security of himself. However, now, it was thanks to his heedfulness that he was able to keep his emotions and the beast in check. Ever since they first saw Gaara’s weakened state, the Suna community slowly realized that it was now possible for him to die like any human would. Gaara was eager to help the people in dangerous missions, yet he and everyone else were all aware that he is not immortal – for each assignment that was given to him, he valued the people’s safety over his own, and in turn, has helped saved countless lives, something that a monster would not do for humans. He had all of the beastly strength to protect himself, yet he chose to donate his chakra on to the people who possessed no such power. It was almost as though he wanted to kill himself if it was to ensure that no one would be afraid of him anymore. The more risky errands he volunteered in, the more “human” people are starting to see in Gaara; they eventually started treating him like an actual person and later figured that Gaara, no longer as Shukaku but as a human being, would be somebody he could trust and depend on. Although he was still quiet, he was at least mindful of the community’s opinion about him. His actions, although reckless, has moved the people closer to him. Their curiosity of his well-being was probably the motive behind his choice of color in his clothes (though it may have started when his siblings were expressing concern over Gaara’s health).
“The Bad” (Shyness that can be overwhelming and problematic for Gaara):
- “cynical shyness” – extreme kind of shyness where he would go so far as to take vengeance on those who rejected or humiliated him when he really wanted to be accompanied, allowing himself to be bitter and distant overtime as he felt it would be easier this way; while aloofness keeps him safe in his cocoon, it only made him more depressed, anxious, and lonely because of the lack of support and friends; rather than tell others how he felt, he instead sucked in and acted out in violence to show his discontentment
- tendency to hold on to his past errors
- lives by the label, can easily submit to what others say about him rather than prove them wrong (given that he has no support), lacking in confidence and willpower
- makes people around him uncomfortable, the cold exterior would make him unapproachable; being “too perfect” or “untouchable” will make others feel a bit intimidated via reputation, power, title, or appearance
- is generally misunderstood, relying on others to guess and fill in the blanks on what he is thinking, would often lead to mistrust and assumptions
- shyness is a special type of narcissism: being overly concerned with how he appears (sometimes called a “fake”, “show-off”, or “poser”); feeling insecure about himself since he dislikes his “weak” personality, would often wear a mask to hide his true identity as though he wanted to escape reality for a little while, subconsciously running from responsibility as the result (In real life, some shy celebrities made careers out of acting because it was convenient for them to hide their insecurities about themselves.)
- fear could keep him from what he truly desires, not daring to take risks for others’ sake
- putting himself down, the distorted belief that he lacks the ability to overcome an obstacle, focusing too much on his own faults and giving himself very little credit when things go in the right direction for him (would dismiss it as either “luck” or claim that it is only “natural” for him, nothing out of the ordinary)
- has impossibly high standards of himself, would frequently beat himself up if things do not go his way
- the time lost and missed opportunities to meet new people that could provide him support and guidance; would sometimes wish that he had took a risk for a probable positive outcome, a chance that he may never get again
- tendency to internalize his problems, failure to take the initiative to ask for help when necessary
- sometimes would not allow the person to get too close due to fear of being rejected or losing them, the guilt that he bears is devastating
- showing genuine interest and seeking to find opportunities to interact with people while hiding could be seen as creepy
- would sometimes be interrupted or even taken advantage of because of his reticence and loyalty
Additional Notes: The list of Gaara’s negative qualities is evenly shared in both his debut in the Chuunin Exams Arc and post-Naruto. Most of what I listed for Part I is self-explanatory. Even though Gaara has gotten a better grasp with his anxiety spells overtime, it could still sometimes hinder his progress mainly due to his preoccupation of his past, although it has more to do with Naruto and his friends than his childhood. For instance, he once acted cold to Naruto due to his concern for him and Sasuke since he would have to be the one to hunt down Naruto’s best friend for his protection as well as the world. As far as Gaara being taken advantage of, his reformed docility has proven to be an asset to the Elders and would later get to seize him to keep his power and intelligence from expanding any further.
“The Ugly” (Shyness that can spell a disaster for everyone including Gaara):
- failure to act, letting things go awry; the “spotlight effect”
- racing thoughts, overthinking, and second-guessing may lead to trouble, especially when dealing with problems alone; “sensory overload”
- too much anxiety could hamper his ability to think things through when unprepared, drawing blanks on what to do on and off the battlefield, could push him to make a careless mistake
- could lead to destruction in existing relationships and himself
Additional Notes: The chaos occurred back when Gaara was in Shukaku form and later when he remained silent before making a big speech in War. The lack of him doing something has sometimes brought about disorientation and confusion from both himself and the others around him. “The spotlight effect” hits Gaara when he least expected it, giving him a “sensory overload” in his brain – this neurological effect causes him to shut down and let things to go out of control. Sensory overload also includes difficulty concentrating and focusing on one activity, getting overexcited, muscle tension, irritability, etc. Gaara was pushed to resort to use Shukaku because of his uncertainty, desperation, and panic. For the first time in his life, his existentialism philosophy was questioned and made it some kind of test to prove whether or not his theory was true or false. The “test” would also be “the end of all tests” since he also happened to be facing a jinchuuriki. A small conscious part of Gaara told him that it was wrong, though he was unsure how he could change since he was forced to grow up isolated while he was fending for his life.