This is me.

Students, you have NO IDEA how high that bar is. 

fuck dude, there’s sure not

Sing|Day 6 of Deceitmber

"Sing to me," Anxiety said as he flapped his hoodie sleeves, plopping down on Deceit's bed across from the older side.

"Of course." Deceit smiled and Anxiety laid down, his head on the other's lap. He was only 7 at the time, while Deceit was 18.

-

Anxiety sighed heavily, knocking on Deceit's door.

"Dee?"

"Definitely don't come in." Anxiety smiled slightly, but it faded quickly. He opened the door, stepping inside and shutting it behind him. Deceit lounged in his bed in silk pajamas, black with yellow trim. "What can I-"

"Sing to me?" Anxiety blurted, his cheeks going red when he realized he interrupted Deceit. The 16 year old toed at the floor, glancing away.

Deceit cocked his head, smiling softly.

"Of course, Anx."

-

"Dee," Anxiety clung to Deceit, suddenly feeling small despite being an adult, "Dee, they- they hate me- I-"

"Anx," Deceit ran his hand through Anxiety's hair like he had a million times before, soft and understanding and everything he needed right now, "calm down. Maybe they do, but I don't. Remus doesn't either. Alright?"

"...alright," Anxiety agreed, taking a deep breath, "sing to me?" Deceit smiled, blissfully unaware of the fact that this would be the last time he'd be asked to do this.

"Of course."

-

Deceit fixed his hat, bracing himself before stepping into the room.

"Hello Anxiety."

"Virgil, actually."

Oh.

"Ah. You told them your name before me?" He asked, a bit of his hurt seeping into his tone.

"Duh." Virgil looked annoyed with him- no, more than that. He looked angry, like he wanted him gone. Deceit knew their fight was bad, and that he'd...left them, but... "Do you want something or could you do me a favor and leave?"

Deceit blinked, heart aching.

"...of course."

I just wanted to point out all of the times someone has been passive-aggressive or mean to Deceit out of pure curiosity. I may have forgotten things, so feel free to add. 

“But Thomas lying would make me just as uneasy. And anyone who doesn’t understand that should just shut up.” — Virgil to Deceit disguised as Patton [CLBG, 17:58]

“Oh, I hate this guy and his creepy… snake face !” — Roman [CLBG, 19:46]

“Nice gloves. Did you just finish washing some dishes?” — Virgil [CLBG, 20:01]

“How dare you stand where he stood?!” — Roman [CLBG, 21:43]

“Get out of here, Jack the Fibber!” — Roman [CLBG, 22:15]

“Uhm, you’re in my spot.” — Patton [CLBG, 22:06]

“GAH! DECEIT! GET OUT! Leave me alone, you slippery snake!” —Thomas [Why Do We Get Out Of Bed In The Morning, 3:28]

“See? See what happens?” — Logan, about Deceit’s sudden appearance [Why Do We Get Out Of Bed In The Morning, 3:35]

“Yeah, he’s a slimy boy, Logan! A slimy boy!” — Thomas [Why Do We Get Out Of Bed In The Morning, 3:37]

“Okay, can I just say it? He’s… freacking… Deceit.” — Roman [SvS, 3:03]

“Hi. Hello. What do you want?” — Virgil [SvS, 3:17]

”Well, your face ruined my day. So we’ll call it even.” — Virgil [SvS, 3:25]

“Just get lost, you… um.” — Thomas [SvS, 3:46]

“No, I honestly don’t believe you can give your honest opinion.” — Thomas [SvS, 3:58]

“Even if he can tell the truth, that doesn’t mean he can be trusted!” — Thomas [SvS, 4:24]

“Yeah, when I think of trustworthiness, I immediately think of someone who consistently disguises themselves like a member of team rocket.” — Virgil [SvS, 4:35]

“Deceit? Standing in the spot of one of my four best friends?” — Patton [SvS, 5:40]

“Because Thomas gave his word, but you wouldn’t know anything about words, would you, mister?” — Patton [SvS, 5:46]

“Okay. Alright. We got a smart aleck over here, uh?” — Patton [SvS, 5:55]

”Are you seriously siding with Deceit?” — Virgil [SvS, 6:10]

“Why is he still here?!” — Virgil [SvS, 6:53]

“I meant Deceit.” — Virgil [SvS, 6:55]

“Can’t say I’m happy about it…” — Patton, about Deceit being there [SvS, 11:18]

“You know? Why is he still… here?” — Logan [SvS, 11:22]

“He tampered with the evidence!” — Thomas [SvS, 15:49]

“So he didn’t want to play by the rules of your game. Big deal! This whole thing is probably rigged anyway it was set up by a liar!” — Virgil [SvS, 16:57]

“I think it’s ridiculous that anyone is entertaining any of this. Guys, he’s a liar. You literally know him as Deceit.” — Virgil [SvS, 19:55]

“Okay…Okay. Well…  Deceit… Let’s get this over with!” — Patton [SvS, 26:09]

“Okay, I can’t believe I’m saying this but that was so edgy and over the top.” — Virgil [SvS, 27:56]

“Why don’t you just leave the teaching to me?” — Logan [SvS, 37:45]

“Bye Deceit.” *sarcastically* “Why don’t we invite him around more often?” — Thomas [SvS, 38:40]

Warning: Angst

He planned for this. He had done everything possible to prepare for anything that may occur. He was the villain. The monster. The deceptive side that had planned on taking revenge on the Light Sides and bringing Virgil back. Then why did he feel so…empty? Why did it all end with every single side there looking at him with hurt and hate, hate, hate? Their eyes boring into him like knives in his chest.

“What are you really after Deceit? What did you really want?” They asked him.

Deceit stared back at them, opening his mouth to say something, anything. But he had nothing to say. He looked at Remus, but the rat side turned away with a sour look on his face. He looked towards Wrath but he avoided Deceit’s gaze. Finally, he looked at Virgil but was met with cold hardened eyes. His hands flew to his head as darkness swam before his eyes. Why was he here? What was he after? Was he only here to deceive? To gain control? What? What? WHAT IS HE FOR?

He didn’t know.

“I-I don’t k-know” he stuttered.  

Tears formed and he squeezed his eyes shut. He felt his breath escaping from his lungs and his body felt so cold, so numb.

“I-I’m sorry” he whispered.

He sunk out before they could stop him. Before they could say a word to him or do anything. He left and appeared in his room, locking the door behind him, and going to his bed.

Had he ever been this tired? Had he ever felt this strange before?

He just wanted to sleep.

To sleep forever and ever.

And nothing more.

Birthday Wishes

hhhhuisbfdubfeiubfuobfuebu I know it’s not Deceit’s birthday still, but I wasn’t sure what to do yesterday for him, but then I saw some awesome art and had ideas! Also sorry to everyone I tag in this. I know I promised my next oneshot would be fluff-

Inspired by : This heartbreaking art created by @lunasfriendgabby 

Warnings : Deceit-centric angst, Morally gray/borderline unsympathetic core sides + Remus 

Masterpost 

——————————

Deceit stared down at the cupcake he’d made himself, and his vision blurred as he sung softly. He was in his pajamas. In fact, he hadn’t changed all day. Deciding to stay in the only clothes that brought him comfort on this day.

They were the last thing he’d received as a birthday gift.

It was quite awhile ago, and the blue and yellow bottoms were showing signs of the time that had passed. The top no longer fit, so he just wore a simple black shirt with it.

Deceit’s hat and capelet we’re discarded beside him. He had made progress, or so he had thought. Deceit had actually left his room earlier, if only to get some food so that today he wouldn’t starve.

Everyone was in the living room, talking amongst themselves or brainstorming for a new video. They saw Deceit walk into the kitchen. Virgil had made some harsh remark that Deceit wasn’t in the mood to respond to. Remus refused to look at Deceit as he walked by.

That’s what hurt Deceit most, he guessed. Was Remus ignoring him. He’d gotten used to the others ignoring the fact it was his birthday, and them always making a point to switch the topic whenever Deceit brought it up.

Remus used to always spend it with Deceit, actually making the day fun and interesting. But after hanging around the core sides for long enough… He stopped. Remus two years ago had wished him a happy birthday, and Deceit only wished that he had cherished the moment longer, not knowing that would be the last time he’d ever be told those two little words.

His vision blurred as he started down at the cupcake, and his throat closed up, a choked sob escaping him. Deceit covered his mouth, muffling the sounds and squeezing his eye shut as he finished singing happy birthday to himself.

Tears slid down his cheeks as he tried and failed to regain his composure, the clock ticking closer and closer to the end of the day. Deceit set the cupcake down, curling further into himself, wishing that at least one of them would even acknowledge today.

“Next year will be better,” he lied.

——————————

Taglists

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@cerberusisspot @nexi0us 

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Anonymous

TW: suicidal intent, mention of breakdowns

His job was finished, and he was left alone. The silence kept him company as he danced slowly to the music from upstairs, a small, sad smile gracing him. Thomas accepted his sides, and Deceit would say proudly that he helped, if anyone had wished to listen. His methods pushed them away, painted him a villain, yet he couldn't bring himself to regret the choice.

He was faintly aware of the rooms fading into grayness around him and the tears slipping over his scales, but all he could hear was the laughter from upstairs. Virgil's, Remus's, all the Sides' laughter. Swelling his heart and cracking his lips into a wider, sadder, happier smile. He'd done his job, maybe not well, and definitely not perfect, but now he could rest.

"Why are you still here?"

His steps faltered and he turned to see a stranger moving in the Subconscious' mists. He walked closer and Deceit realized that no, the stranger wasn't in the mist, he was made out of it.

"I am waiting to die. Why else?"

"It isn't your time. You're needed."

The stranger frowned for a moment. His hands came up to his face and when he pulled them down, Deceit was facing a copy of Virgil, with his old jacket.

"Logan and Patton can't get along without you. Roman and Virgil will blame everyone, and then themselves. Remus will go quiet. All your work will go to waste and Thomas will be back where he was, broken and unable to love himself."

"Why? I've done my job, why would they relapse?"

`Virgil` shook his head. He took Deceit's hand and pulled him to the door leading upstairs, the last thing the Subconscious hadn't yet swallowed.

"You've saved them all, true. But has anything lasted forever? You're the missing piece. You've played backstage all your life, it is time your claim your work."

They stopped at the door, and `Virgil` dropped his hand to open the door, music and laughter falling to meet them.

"Go, Deceit. You don't have to remain anonymous."

Deceit took a tentative step up and cast his eyes back to `Virgil`. He nodded, made a shooing motion, and the door closed.

When Deceit broke apart an argument the next week, it was natural. When he comforted each of them during breakdowns, it was nothing he hadn't done before. And when Virgil pulled him aside one day, and asked him how he was so good at what he did, Deceit smiled.

"It's what I've always done for you. Before, I was just anonymous."

Inspired by the song panic room.

This is a smol sanders sides story idea I wrote ig cuz I was bored :P

So, suddenly all of them (6) are in a big ol black abyss

But there are walls they just blend in :P

Remus and deceit are chillin away from the others, and roman goes to threaten him but is stopped by patton

And like, Patton immediately is starting to comfort the others

And he's like yo kiddos it's ok (insert pun)

But then these funky black shadows knida,

Go into him

And then suddenly everyone is seeing his fears:

He HAS to be happy or else his kiddos will be sad

If they’re sad it's all his fault

Thomas has to be happy

Anything bad that happens is his fault

And then its over and patton is crying 

And they're like!! patton are you ok?

Do you really feel like that??

And roman is like-

It must be those heathens (remus and deceit)

And interrupts remus in the middle of something

And he's like yo patton i'll protect you!!

And then the shadows go to him

If he isn't brave the others will think he's useless

They'll cast him aside and they'll hate him

He has to be creative or else he's a burden

And they're like we’d never think that!!!1

And also they're like wth is going on???

And logan is like

I believe that when we express our main trait, these, things, go towards us and reveal our biggest fears- oop

And then they head towards him.

He can't show emotions or else he can't do his job

If he's emotional he'll be useless and nobody will like hin

But nobody likes him already cuz he doesnt show emotions

He's just annoying

They comfort

And then virgil panics

And he's like how do i not do my function!!!

We are in a panic causing scenario and i'm supposed to,,, not??

And oop

The shadows again\ ;;:D

He is a burden

All he does is scare the others

And weigh thomas down

And make everyone sad

No one likes him

They'll just throw him away

And then it's in color instead of shadowy shapes and it's the others, glaring at him.

Comfort, and logans like, that must be a memory instead :((

They say sorry

and romans like

Yo we should be leaving now, right???

Their dark sides they don't have fears obviously 

And remus goes to make a comment

O.O

He’s trapped in a hole and its getting smaller and smaller help he cant get out its too small-

And then everyone is yelling at him

They all hate him

They'll never like him

Anything he does, he's too annoying, too vulgar, too insensitive

Roman yelling that he hates him

They're in shock

And as remsu cries, deceit goes to comfort him w/ a forlorn look on his face

Like, he could just not lie, and boom it's ok!

But

“Remus its ok, everything is gonna be ok, it's all over now”

:,((

It's too open there's no walls he cant move cant make cover there's no walls it's too open why iSNT THERE ANY WALLS

Everyone insulting him

And virgil leaving, not looking back, yelling at him

Them commenting on how they'll never believe anything he say because he must always lie

The others glaring when he comes

Them scooting away from him

Remus leaving like virgil

And then they are back in their areas, shocked and with many things to talk about.

(Btw I headcanon that remus has claustrophobia and deceit has agoraphobia, where he doesn't like open spaces, like snakes)

Lost Loves - Kingceit

AO3 / Masterpost

Part two: AO3 / Tumblr

Warnings: Fusion, Angst, Deceit straight up slaps someone, i dunno it’s a sad one friends

Summary: 

Deceit really didn’t care for fusion.

Don’t get him wrong, it’s a neat idea and it’s quite interesting to see what two combined sides could become but the lying side really had no interest in ever letting himself join that little party that the others seem to be enjoying so much.

Perhaps he should have been paying more attention to the others though.

Or The King returns when Roman and Remus fuse and Deceit temporarily reunites with his long lost love but it’s not a good time for anyone.

Keep reading

ok but like, imagine late In the night deceit softly singing connie’s part in here comes a thought because he related to it and that’s one of the only ways he knows how so deal with negative emotions,

and maybe someone’s passing by and they hear it or he sings it just a bit louder then he thought he was?

Deceit never having had a genuine laugh. Not once. All the times he’s laughed were either sarcastic, a way to charm someone, or a mask to cover up how empty he feels inside. Every giggle that rose in his throat was backed by a hope that this one was real, not fabricated. Every chuckle uttered filled him with the anticipation that it wasn’t just his natural reflex to appear charming to another. Every loud howl of laughter at something others found funny left him disappointed that he felt no internal reaction. He wanted to feel that urge so badly, he wanted to not be able to control himself when he saw or heard something hysterical. But he was so used to putting walls up, fearing what his real laugh sounded like because a Dark Side’s sounded eerily evil, and what others will think of him that he never learned how.

So if or when he does genuinely laugh for the first time, it’s uncontrollable. It echeos. He’s overjoyed, overwhelmed. His giggles start to morph into loud sobs of joy then relief then overwhelming sadness and he breaks down. The person that made him laugh tries to calm him but the sound of his own weeping and racing thoughts block them out. Finally, finally he was able to laugh…for real this time.

Heat Stroke

I’ve seen a lot of “deceit is cold blooded so he gets cold easily” and I decided to flip the script. Too much heat is just as problematic for reptiles as too much cold. Read on A03 Here 

He was warm. Not unusual. He tended to burrow under blankets while he slept, making more of a nest out of them than anything. He rolled over and yawned, about to go back to sleep, but he frowned. It was bright. He could see the light through his eyelids, it was far too bright in his room, he never left the lights on when he slept.  

He realized with a jolt of panic that he wasn’t lying in bed, either. He didn’t feel the soothing weight of his blankets atop him, nor the softness of his mattress below. Instead, he felt hard ground.

He shot to his feet with a hiss, instantly awake and on guard, quickly taking in his surroundings with a sinking heart.

He was on a large, smooth rock. Before it was what looked like mulch woodchips. But beyond that….

He was in a cage. A terrarium, more accurately, he imagined Logan saying with an adjustment to his glasses. That brought a smile to his face for a moment, before it slipped away.

The glass sides of the tank extended upwards, so high and smooth there was no chance he was going to be able to climb them. The tank itself was a decent size, long enough it took him forty paces to reach from one side from the other, and twenty paces wide.

The most concerning part, besides having been somehow caged in the first place, was the light, and the heat it brought with it.

Looking up, he could make out what seemed to be a uv light, mimicking the sun and its rays, as well as its heat, along with a heat emitter bulb.  

He was already growing uncomfortably warm. He could feel sweat starting to slick his skin, and he desperatly realized there was no shelter from the “sun", not shade, no water, anywhere to be found.

This was bad. This was beyond bad. This was awful.

Without realizing it, he reached for his power, trying to sink out, panicking further when he realized he couldn’t. He could still feel Thomas, but something was keeping him well and truly trapped here.

He started pacing furiously, knowing it would only make this worse in the long run, but he supposed it didn’t matter.

None of the so called light sides would trap him in this manner, no matter how much they disliked or disagreed with him. They were too fundamentally caring to put him through this. No, if they had the nerve to want to kill him, it would be a blow from Romans sword, not… not this.

Which meant it was one of the others, one of his… no. They weren’t his people anymore, were they? Hed given that up when he appeared to Thomas, when he’d made himself known, inserted himself into the equation after denying the rest of them that very thing for years.

He’d be lying of he said everything was fine over on the dark side of the mind, if he denied it was all falling apart, he’d known sooner or later there would be a price on his head. Because he was the only obstacle between them and Thomas.  

And they were tired of waiting.

Suddenly furious, he glared at the glass. He took a breath, retreating as far as he could, before he took a running start, slamming his shoulder against it.

He fell back with a pained cry, gasping as he tried to push past it. He only fell apart more as he looked up, realizing his attempt hadn’t even left the faintest trace of a mark against the glass.

He growled, getting to his feet, winding up before charging again. And again. And again. And again. And-

He screamed as he felt something in his shoulder give, his arm hanging limply at his side, the smallest twitch of his fingers sending agony coursing through his entire left side.

He slumped to the ground, head pressing against the glass as he tried to contain his sobs. He couldn’t cry. He couldn’t afford to lose any more water content.

He was hot. He was so hot. It felt like he was slowly burning, from the inside out, any moisture on his skin had already evaporated, and he could feel himself starting to get lightheaded, the world spinning ever so slightly.

No. No! He wouldn’t give up, he wouldn’t die here, he wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of killing him.

Because unless he got out of here soon, he was going to die. His reptilian traits went deeper than the surface, after all. He’d always had trouble regulating his body temperature. With no shade, no water, no respite to the endless, aching brightness, he was going to overheat. He was going to be cooked alive. He was going to die.

It was slow, and cruel, because he knew exactly what was happening, he was lucid and aware as he staggered back from the glass, searching for something, anything, he could use, common sense giving way to terror.

His only hope was to buy time. Time for the lights to find him, as slim a chance as it was they would even notice, much less care.

Wincing and swearing with every step, he made his way to the edge of the rock, praying it didn’t go down too far, that it was just settled in the dirt, and started to dig.

It felt like hours. His forehead burned and his hand shook and he could feel his heart pounding too hard and too fast, like it was trying to claw its way out of his chest. He kept stopping to cough, so hard he thought his lungs would burst, so short on breath his body was convinced he must be choking, but the air scalded his insides, sent pain blazing down his throat.

Finally, he was down deep enough, down was the hard part. The mulch down here gave way to soft earth, still blessedly moist earth, and he widened his hole until it was just big enough for him to fit, if he curled up his tightest.

He’d made a burrow, digging out a small shelter underneath the basking rock, out of the light and the very worst of the heat, though it wasn’t enough.  

He shivered. He knew that was bad, shivering. It meant his temp was hotter than that of his surroundings. Down here was cooler, only slightly, but cooler, and that meant he was already as hot as the surface of the cage, he guessed 101 or so, and rising.  

He curled tighter, head against his knees as dark spots danced before his vision. He counted his breath, trying to slow his racing pulse, trying to breath in air, but his heart was so, so loud, it drowned out even his thoughts as he felt his muscles go limp.

What did it matter, anyway? No one was coming. No one cared. What did it matter, if he burned to death on his own heat, here?

It didn’t, he supposed. He let out a dry laugh, his tongue sticking to the bottom of his mouth, so dry he couldn’t even make spit anymore. It was like the sahara, in his mouth. He couldn’t speak now if he wanted too, which was somehow the most terrifying thought of all, because words were his weapon, his armor, his defense. Without them, he was nothing.

He was nothing.

He was…

Virgil was in the midst of the worst panic attack he’d ever had in his life. His knees were curled to his chest and he was rocking back and forth, unable to focus on anything else besides the noise in his head, screaming at him that it wasn’t safe, wasn’t right, wasn’t good!

He couldn’t see anything through the black and white spots peppering his vision, his breath coming in too short, unsteady gasps, that tore at his lungs and throat, that burned his chest and screamed in his ears.  

He couldn’t hear anything over the blood rushing, pounding in his ears, his hands gripped his hair, he could vaguely feel his nails digging into his scalp, pricking fine points of pain, he could feel his teeth biting his lip so hard it started to bleed, but that pain wasn’t enough, it wasn’t grounding enough, he could taste the copper on his tongue, and it only made him gag, made his pulse rush faster. He knew someone was counting, someone was trying to reach out, but it was too hot, too hot, too hot!  

“He can’t hear me.” Logan stated, withdrawing his hand at Virgil’s strangled noise at his touch, shaking his head hard and fast. Logan had stopped his counting. “He’s too far in his panic spiral.”  

“So what do we do? Just leave him?” Patton asked, fear pitching his voice higher than usual. None of them had ever seen Virgil quite this bad, he looked to be on the edge of passing out.

“Where is he?” Roman yelped, jumping as Remus launched himself over the couch and into the common area.  

“What the lemony snicket!? What are you doing here?” He asked, but Remus’s gaze had locked on Virgil. He walked purposefully towards him, before being blocked by Logan.  

“Move.” Remus growled, glaring up at Logan, who’s arms were folded, letting his fierceness drop when he found no suspicion or hate in his eyes, only concern.  

“I don’t know if given your turbulent history with Virgil, you should be interacting with him in his current state.” Remus shook his head, and Logan was surprised to find tears forming in his eyes.  

“I can, I can, I need to, you don’t understand, it’s not him, it’s not-” Remus’s fists clenched and unclenched as he let out a breath from between his teeth, struggling to keep his words in order, to keep everything from spilling out, he was shaking, he couldn’t stop shaking.  

“Please! Pleasepleasepleaseplease…” Logan heard Patton’s sharp inhale of breath as Remus broke into tears. He looked over Remus’s shoulder, seeing Roman speechless, gaping like a fish. Patton looked shocked, and he nodded once, towards Virgil. Logan frowned, but nodded back, looking down at Remus.  

“ok. Just… just be careful with him.” Logan said softly, squeezing his shoulder as he stepped aside. Remus nodded, taking a few steps forwards, before kneeling in front of Virgil, who still rocked, breath catching and heaving, eyes covered by his bangs.

“Vee.” He said the old nickname, and instantly Virgil froze, head jerking up, eyes blown wide with panic as they met Remus’s.  

“R…r…ree…” Remus shook his head, moving closer.  

“It’s ok, stormy, don’t try and talk. It’s him, isn’t it? It’s Dee?” Virgil nodded so fast his head spun, and he closed his eyes against the wash of dizziness.  

“Feel it. Bad, is bad, too hot, too hot!” Virgil cried, hands digging deeper into his scalp.  

“None of that, now. Squeeze my hands ok? As hard as you need. You’re not gonna hurt me.” Remus said softly, surprised as Virgil instantly let go of his hair and clutched Remus’s hands as if they were his only lifeline, so hard Remus could hear bones popping.  

“Good. That’s good, Vee. I know it’s hard, but I need you to focus. I can feel it too, he’s in trouble, bad trouble, right?” Virgil nodded again, and Remus could feel him calming somewhat.  

“I need you to tell me what you can feel. What he can feel. We need to find him.” He could feel Virgil trembling, shaking as he started coming back to himself, rocking a bit faster on his heels. “I know its hard, I know it doesn’t feel good, I know it hurts, but you’re the only way we have to find him. I need you to try. I’m right here, I’ll be right here. Okay?” Remus reassured. Virgil bit his lip, wincing at the pain.  

“O… oh… okay. Cl-closer? Pl-pl-please?” Virgil asked, breathless and shaky. Remus scooted closer, surprised as Virgil climbed onto his lap, letting out a trembling breath. Hesitantly, Remus let out his tentacles, wrapping them around Virgil to keep him steady on his lap, so he didn’t have to let go of his hands.  

“Too much?” He asked, feeling Virgil shaking in his grasp.  

“N-no.” He mumbled. “G-g-good.”  

“Okay. Are you ready?” Virgil nodded. He took as deep a breath as he could, before squeezing Remus’s hands tighter, closing his eyes.  

It was hot, it was far too hot. His throat was dry, scorching air in and out. It was dim, but not dark, he could feel something soft and dry on either side of him, dirt? Hopeless, he was hopeless, he was sure no one was coming, no one would find him, the others had done their job well, caging him in this glass prison like the snake he was, light and heat and rock and it was hot, hot, hot!  

Dying, he was dying, he could feel it. His heart pounded too hard and too fast, his breath was shallow and quick, his vision was failing, his senses shutting down, he was burning, every inch was burning, and he was giving up, it was too much, his eyes slipped closed and-  

“No! Nonono n-n-n-no, D-d-dee, Dee, d-d-d"  

“Virgil. Virgil, where? I need to know, where?” Virgil was hyperventilating, on the edge of breaking down again, but he knew Remus was right, they needed to know where. He squeezed Remus’s hands harder, it hurt, it hurt, he couldn’t hold it much longer, but he needed to know, which one, which one, where…  

“Wrath!” He gasped out, slumping against Remus, exhaustion cresting over him. “it was wrath.” He whispered, feeling the tentacles retract, only Remus’s arms left holding him, his hands having let go at some point, but he was too worn out to care, to open his eyes. He felt Remus press a soft kiss to his forehead, the tip of his nose. It reminded him of when Remus used to put him to bed at night.  

He would always tell some rambling, nonsense story, it didn’t make any sense, and it didn’t have to, it kept his brain occupied, trying to decipher the words, letting his worries fade and allowing him to get some sleep. Before he drifted off, Remus would always tuck him in tight, whisper words of love, kiss his forehead, his nose, his cheek, before turning on his nightlight and gently shutting the door.  

“Thank you. You did so good, my little storm cloud, my dark night. You are so, so, good, love. I’m so proud.” Remus murmured in his ear.  

“Dee… y-you need to g-get Dee.” He felt a gentle hand brush his bangs back from his face, caress his face softly, and he shuddered, leaning into the contact.  

“We will, Vee. I’ve gotta let you go, okay? We’re gonna go get him, right now.” Virgil clung to him tighter, shaking his head. For the first time, Remus looked up at the others.  

Logan was looking at the two of them critically, no doubt trying to decipher what was going on, what had just happened, and Remus thanked his lucky stars that he had let Remus through, none of the others would have known what was happening, much less how to calm Virgil from an attack like this one. They’d never had to.  

Roman was looking at him with wide eyed surprise and suspicion, a frown on his face, but Remus didn’t care what Roman thought at the moment, he had more important things to worry about.  

“patton. I’m leaving you with Patton, ok? He’ll take care of you, you know he will. And… and I’ll be right back, ok? I’ll be right back with Dee.” Remus promised, shifting Virgil in his arms as he stood, passing him to a surprised looking Patton.  

“He needs to sleep. Lots of sleep. And he usually gets cold, after this. And… and he might have nightmares. He will, until I get to Dee, but even after that, so be careful if he wakes up in the next hour or so, he won’t be here, fully.” Remus listed off, turning away with fire in his eyes.  

“Remus. I would like to come with you.” He stilled at Logan’s words, turning to face the logical side, eyes narrowed in suspicion.  

“Why?” Logan adjusted his glasses.  

“because from what I heard just now, it seems Deceit is in some sort of mortal peril, and I have the most medical knowledge of anyone here. Whatever the situation, I will be able to assist.” Remus didn’t have time to argue, and truthfully, he didn’t want to.  

“I’m coming too.” That was more surprising. Roman and him were on ok terms, but still, Roman kept his distance, thought Remus was weird and gross. Roman softened at his brother’s gaze. “I know we don’t always get along, but I don’t hate Deceit. We need him, as much as we need you, as much as we need any of us. And if it is wrath, you might need the extra sword.” Remus nodded curtly, running a hand through his hair.  

“Ok. I can take us directly there, take my hands.” Remus ordered, smiling just a bit as he felt two hands instantly hold onto his. He let out a breath, steeling himself. “this might be a bumpy ride.” Then he closed his eyes and the three sank out.

Logan and Roman staggered as their feet touched solid ground. It had felt like they were falling for eternity, swirling around and around until they hadn’t known up from down, until their minds spun and they feared they’d never make it out.  

Then it was suddenly over.  

“Um… you alright? I did say it was a bumpy ride.” Remus said sheepishly as Logan straightened his glasses, and Roman stood up from where he’d been hunched over, trying not to hurl.  

“Fine. I’m fine. Let’s just… get a move on.” Roman replied, glancing around. They were in a hall with doors, much like their hallway on the light side. Remus stalked over to one painted brilliant, crimson red, flame decals across the bottom. With a battle cry, he kicked the door in, mace in hand as he prepared to swing. He froze instead, mace dissepating in the air as he ran to the glass.

“Dee! Snake face, can you hear me?” He shouted, pounding against the glass. No response. He swore, mace appearing back in his hands. He wound up, and swung forcefully. It bounced off, but left a hairline crack. He screamed, and hit it again, fractures spiraling up the glass. One more swing, and an explosion of glass shattered inwards, sending him stumbling forwards and onto his hands and knees. He barely noticed the glass cutting into his knees, scratching his hands and cutting into his skin. It didn’t matter.  

Dim, not dark. That’s what Virgil had said, so he wasn’t above ground, somewhere, there was no shade to be seen. He noticed the heat next, it was hot, easily over a hundred, probably more, and he cursed again.  Too hot, burns, Vee was right yet again.  

He scanned the mostly empty area, noticing a strange pile near the large rock in this… god, he hated to call it an enclosure, but that’s what it was. He sprinted towards it, feeling himself sweat. He ran hot, if he was already sweating from this, and Dee had been here long-

The pile wasn’t Dee. It was dirt. But next to the pile was a shallow hole. He dropped into it, looking around, dim, not dark. And there he was. He sucked in a breath, cursing in a nonstop rant as he reached in, gently extracating Deceit from his clumsily made burrow.  

He was burning hot. He was so hot his skin was red and burned, his scales were dry and flaking. His breath was far, far too fast and shallow, rapid breaths against his too quick heartbeat. His head lolled against Remus’s chest, completely limp in his arms, and one arm hung at an unnatural angle. He was too hot, too dry, his fever was up to 110.  

“The fuck are you doing in my room?” His voice was hot and scorching, raspy and burning. Remus turned, glaring just as hard as Wrath was, feeling his tentacles sprout from his back, his mouth twisting into a snarl. Surprise flashed across his face as Roman and Logan stepped between him and Wrath, Roman’s sword drawn, and Logan’s hands glowing a deep green.

“Oh come on, you brought the lovey dovey squad with you? How pathetic.”  

“Not pathetic. Strategic.” Logan replied. Wrath rolled his eyes.

“Please. How’d you even know he was here? I made sure he couldn’t call for help.” Wrath stated, leaning casually against the wall, making Remus growl deep in his throat. “Was it that little tattle tale wannabe light side? I’ll have to pay him a visit, teach him a lesson.” Remus moved to step forwards, but Roman did before he could, eyes aflame.  

“You won’t be going anywhere near him. You won’t be going anywhere near any of them, ever again.” Roman growled, flames erupting from his sword, and with a slash, they sprung from the ground, surrounding wrath in head tall, burning blue flames. For the first time, fear sparked in Wrath’s eyes as he pressed back against the wall.  

“you wouldn’t.” Wrath hissed, and Roman’s eyes narrowed as he leaned through the flames, which didn’t singe a hair on his body, pressing his blade to Wrath’s throat, just hard enough to draw a bead of blood.  

“I fucking would. And if i ever see your face again, if you ever threaten my family again, if you ever hurt any of them again, I will. I’d lay low for a while, if I were you.” Roman hissed, twisted smile on his lips as flames danced in his eyes. ”Otherwise, who knows what unfortunate accident might befall you?” With that he turned on his heel, walking back to Remus, Logan already examining the unconcsious Deceit with a frown on his face.  

“He’s gotten heatstroke. A very acute, severe case, as well. The best thing we can do is get him back to the commons and work on cooling him off, slowly, so as to not shock his system. If we do this carefully, he should be alright. I can tend to that arm there, as well.” Logan reassured lowly. Remus nodded, glaring up at Wrath once more, hoping he conveyed all his hatred and ire in that one look, succeeding, if the shudder Wrath gave was any indication. Then Logan and Roman each took hold of one of his arms, and they sunk out.

Hot, hot, burning. His scales were flaking, falling off, his skin was peeling, turning red, his breath was short, his heart was failing, he was dying, Dee was dying, he couldn’t hold on any longer, they were too late, and he was gone-

He shot awake with a wild sob, hands covering his face as he shook, unable to shake the vision of Dee from his mind, unable to tell if it was true or not,  but he could still feel the residual pain, the fire that crawled through his veins, that burnt him up from the inside out, that devoured his breath and his lungs.  

He jerked as he felt a hand on his shoulder, meeting Patton’s eyes.  

“Kiddo? You okay?” Virgil shook his head, arms wrapping around himself. It was still too hot, too hot, but something else, something good. Safe, he was safe, they had him!

He scrambled to his feet just as the others sunk back in, everyone staggering except Remus, who had a determined look on his face as he set Deceit down on the couch. Instantly, Virgil was on the couch, Deceit’s head in his lap, stroking his hands through the side’s hair, tears falling silently down his face.  

“Roman, get me a box fan, something that can blow a steady stream of air on him, and the aloe from the bathroom. Patton, a bowl of cool water and a washcloth, as well as the ice packs. I’ll get my medical supplies. Remus, stay with the both of them.” Logan ordered, everyone splitting up on their respective quests.  

“Vee? How you doing?” Remus asked softly, sitting on the arm of the couch behind Virgil, wrapping his arms around Virgil’s middle.  

“good. Bad. I don’t… it’s all… still see it.” Remus nodded, tucking his chin against Virgil’s shoulder.  

“It’s ok, stormcloud. Can you breathe with me? Just try to match me, okay?” He breathed in deep, mentally counting, emphasizing each step, feeling Virgil begining to copy his rhytm. By the time the others returned, he’d slid off the arm and into Virgil’s seat, Virgil curled on his lap, arms wrapped around his neck, face pressed against his chest in sleep, Dee’s head in his lap.  

“We need to remove his layers, it’s only hindering him at this point. Roman?” Logan asked. Roman nodded, and with a snap, Deceit was in a soft tee shirt and pajama shorts. It was strange, seeing him so exposed, and a bit unnerving. It frightened him, seeing the usually suave and smooth side so unguarded and unresponsive, Roman realized, and looking at the others, he could tell they felt the same.

Quietly, Roman plugged the fan in, turning it on low and setting it on the coffee table, blowing air at Deceit’s torso. Logan took the ice packs, and positioned them under Deceit’s armpits, under his knees, and behind his neck, setting the arm in a sling, frowning as Deceit didn’t react at all to what would have been a very painful jolt. Patton carefully, gently, rubbed in the lotion and then the aloe onto his skin, wincing at the burns and dryness, at the flaking scales, at the heat still emenating from his body. Remus took the rag and started dabbing at Dee’s forehead, trying to cool his temp.

“Now what?” Patton asked, slumping back on the opposite end of the couch, looking to Logan for answers.

“We can do nothing but wait. Now that he is out of there, and cooling down, his pulse and breathing should start to return to a steady and normal level. He will be exhausted, his skin will hurt like a severe sunburn and take some time to heal, but he should be stable in only a few hours, awake a few after that.” Logan said, falling into his armchair. Roman was the only one who couldn’t seem to settle, pacing the floor.  

“Remus, what…what was happening? With Virgil?” Patton asked, concern in his eyes as he realized Virgil was still shaking, face scrunched tight in his sleep.

“He sees things. When… when one of us is in trouble, he can sense it. Usually it’s not much, it’s small enough it doesn’t affect him at all. Like when Roman’s stressed over a video deadline, or Logan can’t solve an equation, or you can’t find the recipe you’re looking for. He feels it, the… stress, the anxiety, he can tell where it’s coming from and who. This… this was so strong, I could feel it. I knew he must if I could. When it’s that strong, he can’t separate what’s happening to the person he’s feeling and what’s happening to him. It’s like he’s there. That’s how I knew he could find Dee. He could see where he was, feel it, though it’s hard to focus enough to see details through someone else’s perspective. Between pushing himself to see, and the panic attack, he’s completely wiped out.” Remus answered, rubbing Virgil’s arm as the side started to whimper in his sleep.  

“There’s only been a handful of times it affected him this badly. The first time was me. I got into a fight in the imagination I couldn’t win. I managed to get away, but I didn’t have the strength left to heal myself or shift the enviroment. I was bleeding out on the forest floor. Scared the hell out of Dee, but he caught on pretty quick that Virgil wasn’t just panicking, something was up. Enough details spilled out, Deceit realized what was going on, managed to find me based off his descriptions. I’d be dead three times over it weren’t for him.”  

“And the other times?” Logan asked. Remus scowled, face darkening.  

“What, can’t deduce that? Most of the others have never been fond of Dee. He’s the only thing keeping them away from Thomas, the only obstacle in their way to running rampant. I at least have the sense to see he’s right! I hate it, but he’s right to keep me from Thomas, to keep me away, to keep my presence to a minimum. I hate… I hate how I am, but that’s not his fault, has never been, and he…” Remus stopped, too choked up for a moment to continue, his gaze resting on Deceit’s too pale face. “The other three have been traps. Set for Deceit. To kill him. So the others can run free.” Remus laughed hollowly, shaking his head. “How funny, right? He plays the villain, puts on the façade, so you all don’t have to face the real monsters in Thomas’s mind. He’s spent every second of his existence protecting you all, keeping them away, almost dying for you and your precious standards of purity and light, and you couldn’t give less of a damn if you tried.” Remus closed his eyes against the grief and sadness and futility overwhelming him.  

“I… I didn’t know… I’m sorry, Remus.” Remus shook his head, laughing bitterly at his brother’s words.  

“You didn’t care to know. There’s a difference. Whatever. It doesn’t matter, it’s not the point.”  

“Remus. It does matter. I mean it, I didn’t think, and I’m sorry. How… how long has it been like that?” Remus shrugged.  

“It wasn’t so bad. We were never as close as you guys. But it only got worse after Dee revealed himself. It made them mad, why should he be able to show himself, but keep them all hidden? Who was he to hold that power? It had always been him, me and Virgil, against them. We both understood Dee, agreed with him. Virgil is fight or flight, anxiety, after all, he knew it was a bad idea. And I… well. Look at me. I know I’m not good. I know I’m just… just an illness. Then… then Vee left. We both helped push him out the door, pushed him to show up and make himself known, we knew what would happen, we knew he would leave, but we knew it was for the best. But it got harder, after that. They got stronger, and madder, and Virgil still stepped in, if we asked, but we didn’t want to drag him back into it, so we didn’t as much as possible and it was only a matter of time until something like this happened and I-” He caught his breath, gently stroking Deceit’s scaled cheek, cracking open his tear streaked eyes as he felt Deceit lean into his touch, though he still showed no signs of awakening. “I tried. I just… I can’t be everywhere at once. And he doesn’t tell me everything. He goes off on his own sometimes, and Wrath must have nabbed him then. Probably ambushed him, else Dee would have bit his head off.” Remus said fondly, dabbing the cloth over Dee’s scales, trying to get some moisture on them.  

With his normal outfit gone, it was easy to see why Dee wore so many layers. Scales in varying colors, from the gold on his face, to deep silvery blue along his arms and pale lilac on his hands traced patches and lines across his body. His nails were sharp, reminiscint of talons, and he was thin, but his muscles were toned, no doubt allowing him more strength than he seemed capable of, and his whip fast speed. Along with the scales, they could see lines of old scars on his skin, no doubt a testament to all the scrapes he’d gotten into with the others.  

“We’re moving you. If… that is, if you want. I’ll move your rooms up here right now. Then they can’t get to Deceit, and he can keep them contained using his power from a distance. If he has to go down there to handle them, at least he has a safe place to come back to up here.” Patton’s voice was gentle but firm, and Remus was left speechless at the offer. He opened and closed his mouth several times, taken aback.  

“yes. Please.” He finally managed to spit out, spurred on by the concern on Patton’s face. Patton nodded with a small smile, closing his eyes. He felt out their rooms in the mindscape, in the downstairs, and pulled, with all his might, feeling them settle in the hallway, opposite each other, next to Virgil and Roman’s rooms, respectivly. He staggered as he finished, Roman stopping in his pacing to catch him, keep him upright.  

“Okay, padre?” He asked, Patton clutching at his shirt.  

“Yeah. I just forgot how much energy that takes. The last time I did it was Virgil, I don’t think I’ve ever moved so much at once. I maybe got a little ahead of myself, there.” Patton said, trying to step away from Roman. His legs buckled from under him, and Roman swept him up off his feet, leaving Patton giggling and smiling sheepishly at the bridal hold, Roman equally as flushed at his own instincts.  

“Er, sorry. I’ll settle you down on the other recliner, yeah?” Roman asked, chuckling as Patton yawned, shaking his head.  

“Nah. You’re cozy…”  Patton murmured, tucking his head against Roman’s chest, arms wrapping around his middle in a hug as his eyes drifted shut. Roman rolled his eyes fondly, kissing the top of Patton’s head, smiling as Patton let out a soft happy noise, nuzzling closer as he sat down in the chair and tucked a blanket around Patton.  

“Guess it’s naptime. Wake me up if anything happens, Lo.” Roman said softly, settling in and closing his eyes, starting to snore softly almost immediately.  

Logan’s full attention turned to Remus. Despite Deceit in his lap, and Virgil koala hugging him, he was tense, eyes roving over Deceit’s face as he dabbed at him with the cloth, frowning at every tic of his eyelids, every twitch of his fingers. Occasionally he paused to smooth back Virgil’s hair, murmur softly in his ear when he made a distressed sound or squeezed him a little tighter, no doubt having a nightmare, as Remus had said to expect.

His mind turned over and over all the things Remus had said. He should have realized sooner that the others would not be friendly towards Deceit, and it was not a large jump to violence, for those sides, anyways. But that’s not what his mind was stuck on.  

“Remus. You… do you believe, what you said, about yourself?” He asked, watching Remus flinch imperceptibly, sink back into his seat, brows furrowed as he looked at the floor.  

“yes. It’s… it’s true! I’m just the screw up, the bad part of creativity, the part Thomas didn’t want, and all I do is drive him up the wall and none of my ideas are good, and Deceit was right, to keep me locked away. Cause look what happened when he let me out. It’s like you said. It’s better… it’s better to just ignore me until I go away.” Logan softened as Remus’s voice cracked, the creative side still refusing to look anywhere near him.  

“Oh, Remus. That’s not what I meant at all. And you’re forgetting what else I said. That you would help Thomas if he chose to pursue more adult themes, which we all know he is going to. Perhaps not dolphin sex or whale genetelia,” That got a snort of laughter out of Remus, and Logan adjusted his glasses, pleased, “but the topic of depression, which has already been lightly touched on, the topic of suicide, of self harm. And that is just as you pertain to Thomas. Not as you pertain to us.” Remus looked up at him, hope and puzzlement warring on his face.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, we care about you, as Remus, not just as creativity. Patton doesn’t shift the mindscape lightly, and surely you’ve noticed Roman trying harder to spend time with you, to get to know you again. I had been trying to be welcoming as well, though emotions are… hard for me to express in the way I would like. You are not an illness. You are not a disease. You are useful, you are needed, you are loved.” Logan said the last sentence with a rush, already embarased by what he’d said, but the broken, shattered look on Remus’s face stopped him. He took a breath, and crossed the few steps to where Remus sat, crouching so he was at eye level with him, holding his gaze steadily.  

“Remus, you are needed. You are loved. You are wanted.” He repeated, slowly, wishing he could chase away the doubt and fear on Remus’s face.  

“Truth.” Came a quiet, rasping whisper, making the both of them jump. Deceit’s eyes were open a slit, though he didn’t seem to have the strength to move, to even turn his head.  

He felt awful. His limbs were like noodles, his head lolled against Remus’s knee, and he tried, but he couldn’t even shift his neck to get a better look at Remus, who was hovering over him like a mother hen. His vision was blurry, forms too bright and fuzzy at the edges, he couldn’t even open them all the way. He only knew it was Remus because of the streak of grey that stood out against the dark, and his voice. He tried to speak again, to reassure Remus, but his words caught in his throat, and he ended up coughing, his mouth desperetly searching for moisture, but it was dry, dryer than it had ever been, his tongue swollen and thick against the roof of his mouth. By the time the fit had passed, he was wheezing for air, air that burned his too dry throat and nearly sent him into another round.  

But then someone was helping him to sit, and there was a glass of water to his lips, and he tried to drink slow, but it felt so good. It was like a cooling breeze in the midst of a muggy summer day, like rain over a forest fire, the sweetest, purest, relief he’d ever felt in his life, and he let out a whine as the glass was taken away.  

“Easy, Deceit. Too much at once will make you sick. You can have more in a few minutes.” Logan’s voice reassured. He cracked his eyes open further, squinting against the brightness that seemed to be everywhere. “How are you feeling?”  

“tired. Cool. It’s… h-how did you…” He swallowed, trying to get the lump in his throat down as it all came rushing back. The heat, the fear, the surety that this was it, this the end, no one was coming, he could still feel the earth under his nails, the heat all around, the fire eating away at him-

“Dee! Deedeedeedeedee-” Then there was a bundle of warmth throwing itself at him, sending him sprawling back across the couch, and it took him a moment to recognize the splash of purple against the darkness of his jacket. Without pause, he wrapped his arm around Virgil, pulling him close, realizing the other was bound in a sling against his chest, aching dully. Virgil didn’t seem to care, he wrapped his arms around Dee’s neck, burying his head in the crook of his neck, legs wrapping around him in a koala hug, pressed so tight against him Deceit could feel every tremble and breath and heartbeat against his skin, soothing something inside him, warming him in a good way from the inside out.

“Shadow, little shadow, you found me. You did it, you found me, dearest, it’s going to be ok now.” He murmured, feeling Virgil’s tears against his shirt. “so brave, you’re so very brave, dearheart.”  

“W-w-wrath had you, h-h-h-ot, saw it, can’t, c-c-can’t st-st-stop-” Deceit shushed him, pulling back, pressing a kiss to Virgil’s forehead, his cheeks, finally resting his forehead against Virgil’s, all he could see those dark, violet eyes.

“I know. But I’m here, dearest, because of you, I’m here. I’ll be right here. Go back to sleep, lovely.” Deceit murmured, watching as Virgil struggled to keep his eyes open. “I’ll be right here.” He kissed Virgil’s eyelids as they fluttered shut, and Virgil let out a soft sigh against him, curling into his chest and somehow holding him tighter. Deceit nestled his head atop Virgil’s, and let his own eyes slip closed once more.

“Dee?” Remus, voice worried. He couldn’t find the strength to peel his eyes back open, not with Virgil hugging him tight, filling him with warmth.  

“M’fine. Tired. Lil dizzy, yet, but m’fine.” He mumbled, slipping into darkness once more.

With those two curled up together on the couch, there was room for Logan to slip into a seat beside Remus, hesitantly, carefully, pulling him into a tentative hug. Remus froze at his touch, and he worried he’d overstepped, then Remus let out a soft wail, hugging him back, letting his stress and worry and fear drain out of him in his shaky, quiet sobs.  

“You meant it. You meant it.” Remus said breathlessly, wiping away tears and snot on his sleeve. Logan frowned smally.  

“I did. I think it is safe to say Deceit will be alright. He has clearly recovered from the heat, if not the exhaustion. Meaning you should get some sleep, as well.” Remus looked like he wanted to protest for a moment, before slumping into Logan’s arms with a sigh.  

“Alright. Only for you, Lolo.” He closed his eyes and started snoring just as fast as Roman had. Logan chuckled, taking off his glasses and setting them on the coffee table, before settling back in his seat. Some sleep would be good for him.

Virgil woke first, slowly, sleep trying to tug him back into its warm embrace. He was still tired, no, exhausted. It reached to his bones, the weight trying to tug him back down, and blearily he thought he hadn’t felt like this since-

His eyes shot open, breath speeding for a moment as he saw only black, before he felt the warm exhale of breath against his hair, and realized he was being held tight, entwined with another side. Shifting, he felt everything inside him loosen as he saw that half-scaled face, as he felt Dee’s heart beating, his breath coming in and out, his skin still looked red and flaky, but far less angry than the day before. As he watched, Deceit let out a soft groan, his own eyes slowly flicking open, resting on Virgil’s, a soft smile quirking his lips.  

“Hi.” Was the tired word that escaped his lips, but it was enough, because Virgil was hugging him again, so tight he could barely breath for a moment, before his hold loosened and he pulled back, a fierce look on his face.  

“Don’t you ever do that to me again, Dee. Don’t… don’t scare me like that.” He muttered furiously. Deceit sighed, shifting to sit up, Virgil following and settling beside him on the couch. Deceit ran a hand through his hair, looking around the room, surprised to see Logan curled up with Remus in his arms, less surprised that Roman and Patton were in the same position on the recliner.  

“Oh yes, because I very much wanted to get trapped in a container like I was some kind of pet and then boiled to death from the inside out. That was exactly my intent.” He replied, unable to help the sarcasm that slipped into his voice. He smiled as Virgil let out a breathy laugh, resting his head on Dee’s shoulder.  

“Okay, fair. You’re just lucky Remus was around.” Deceit frowned, turning to look at Virgil.  

“How are you doing, dearest?” Virgil let out a breath, fidgeting with his hoodie sleeves.  

“Alright. Still… worn down. Remus helped. God knows I wasn’t making sense, but he calmed me enough I could focus, I could see… I was scared…” Virgil said softly, so softly, and Deceit reached out, tucking Virgil’s bangs back, stroking his cheek.  

“I know. But you did such a good job, shadow, little shadow.” Virgil rolled his eyes, but shoved his head against Deceit’s hand much like a cat demanding pets. He laughed, and started massaging Virgil’s scalp, the action soothing both him and Virgil, it had been so long since he’d had this much contact with anyone, he realized.  

“Mhph. Virg? You up?” Roman grumbled, stretching and yawning hugely as he blinked open his eyes. Deceit froze, flinching back, expecting Roman to shriek or summon his sword, and he was too tired to deal with his theatrics and put up his usual façade. Instead, Roman’s eyes widened, and he gently shook Patton.  

“Pat! He’s awake!” Instantly, Patton was on his feet, crouching before Deceit.  

“Oh, goodness, I’m so glad you’re up. Logan said you’d be fine and just needed to sleep, but you had me scared, kiddo. Um, we have some lotion and aloe here, for you, but I don’t know if you use something else on your scales that might help, they’re pretty bad, too. Do you want something to eat? Oh, and I should get you something to drink right away, you’re still really dehydrated, water? Or would juice be better, it has more sugar and stuff?” Patton rambled.  

‘Patton, you’re crowding him. Juice would be preferable, and something simple, toast and scrambled eggs, if that’s acceptable?” Logan asked, looking to Deceit, who nodded.  

“Yeah. Sounds… fine. I have some oil, in my room, Remus knows where.” He said softly, realizing Remus was awake and staring at him as if he hadn’t seen him in years. Abruptly, Deceit realized his normal outfit was gone, leaving his legs and arms exposed, and he shivered.  

“We changed you out of your clothes yesterday, to aid in your cool down. Your temperature is sufficiently lowered now, if you wish to change back. We also have moved your and Remus’s rooms up here, with Remus’s permission.”  

“You don’t have to do that.” He answered softly. Logan cocked his head.  

“But we have. What I said to Remus applies to you as well, Deceit. We should have worked to make that clearer, sooner. Please, let us help.” Deceit blinked slowly, before nodding, settling back on the couch.  

“Ok.” He snapped his fingers, and his outfit changed into soft fleece pajamas, patterned with dark scales. It felt good against his sensitive skin. Remus popped back up, a bottle in his hand, which he passed to Deceit.

“Let me help. I can reach the ones on your back.” Virgil said, gently taking the oil from him, waiting for a reply. Shakily, Deceit nodded, feeling his aching muscles start to relax as Virgil carefully rubbed his back. He realized Remus still hadn’t said anything, an unusual occurance, and met his gaze, tilting his head in a silent question.  

Remus let out a breathy laugh, sitting on the couch cross legged before Deceit, taking both of Dee’s hands in his, simply staring at his face as if he couldn’t get enough of it, searching it for something, though Dee couldn’t pinpoint what.  

“Ree?” He asked, gently, and Remus squeezed his hands.  

“What if I hadn’t noticed you were missing? What if they distracted me enough I didn’t come after you? What if I didn’t feel your panic? What if Virgil hadn’t been able to see? What if no one realized what was happening until it was too late? What if we found you and you’d shriveled up like a prune, crumbling to dust before our eyes? What if we watched your heart slow and stop and your breathing stutter out and your eyes close and they never, never opened up again? What if-” Deceit gently extricated one of his hands from Remus’s, and guided it to his chest, over his heart. “I can’t stop, can’t stop, it’s so loud…” He muttered, Dee rubbing circles against his knuckles.  

“I know, love. But you can feel that, right? Tell me what that is.” He asked softly, earnestly.  

“You’re heart.” Came the mumbled response.  

“Yes. And what is it doing?” Remus’s eyes flicked to his for just a moment, before looking away again, though he could see the thoughts starting to slow, his eyes starting to clear.  

“Beating.”  

“Good. Now, what about this?” He asked, moving Remus’s hand so it was over his diaphram. “What is that?” He could see the small smile starting to grow on Remus’s face.  

“You breathing.” He murmured. Deceit smiled.  

“Indeed. Do you know why, my heart is still beating, I am still breathing?” Remus didn’t respond, but he was looking at Deceit now, meeting his affectionate gaze. “Because you did notice I was gone, you did feel my panic, you did find Virgil, you did focus him enough he could see, you did find me in time, you did get me help and you did make sure I was alright. That’s what matters. Can you remember that for me, Ree? Can you focus on that?” Remus’s smile was bright as he nodded, tears in his eyes as he wrapped his arms around Deceit, who laughed as Virgil was pulled into the hug by Remus’s tentacles, grumbling but making no move to escape the hold.  

He could hear Patton in the kitchen, the smell of eggs starting to waft through the room. He could hear Roman talking softly with Logan, who was already flipping through whatever book he was reading, trying to find the page he’d been on. And he could feel the warmth from his two best friends surrounding him, filling him with a soft joy he hadn’t felt in far too long.  

And he wondered if nearly dying was maybe the best thing that had ever happened to him

Deceit kisses them like he's dying, like it's the last thing he'd ever do, the only thing worth doing for the rest of his life. He clings to them like they'll disappear when he lets go, hands gripping at their shirt, their hair, their shoulders, anything to keep them here, to keep Deceit here, where he wants to stay until he breathes his last breath.

"Please," he whimpers against their lips, a muffled sob wracking his body, "please, don't do this to me, I can't- don't leave me, please, don't make me wak-"

"It's time to wake up, De." They whisper to his horror, cupping his cheek.

He sat up in bed, eyes wide as he gripped the sheets.

"No- no!" He hissed, drawing his knees up to his chest and fisting his hands in his hair. "No..."

Why couldn't he just stay asleep?

Asleep, where his love was returned and he could kiss them until he was out of breath abd his lips turned blue. Asleep, where he didn't have to worry about them not even liking him, let alone loving him, because of who and what he was.

He knew that here, in real life, he was hated, and he was so, so tired.

He just wanted to stay asleep.

Here's a small doodle of Kingceit angst cause why not.

When you find out your dead bae wanted to get married with u and now the angst level is rising-

TW: Deceit Angst and sorta mean quotes from Roman

So yeah....

That's probably why they haven't showed up.

Lmao :V

So I may have made Light!Side Deceit. 

He’s the same as canon Janus personality-wise. The only differences are that my version is a he/they nonbinary icon and he has a new outfit (prone to another redesign.) I’m very proud of the first panel, tbh.

What basically happens, if it’s not clear, is he’s fully accepted and goes through a magical girl transformation.

Bonus:

[who is boyfriend is is up to discussion… uwu]

A fic to procrastinate my WIPS

Ships: Brotherly Creativitwins (DON'T TAG AS REMROM)

TW: uhhhh just tons of sadness. Remus angst, And Roman angst. (ik a lot of people are mad at him right now but even so he's still one of my favorite characters) oh and minor cursing

This is inspired by this post by @stargazing-squid

Part 2 coming soon

Janus entered the "dark side" mindscape. What a day! The light sides... well most of them, had finally accepted him as part of Thomas!! He understood that Roman had to unlearn what had been taught to him for so long, that all "dark sides" are bad. Still, it kinda stung. Him laughing at his name.

But it doesn't matter right now! He can't wait to tell Remus what happened!

"Hey, Remus! You would not believe the day I just had-" Tears? Those were tears running down his face. Janus' grin began to fade.

"Remus?"

"You.. You think I'm evil?" he whispered

What?? No! Why would he even- oh. Oh shit.

"Wh- Oh. No of course not! Oh my gosh I'm so- I didn't mean- I didn't even think-"

"Think what? That I would hear you? So it was perfectly fine for you to tell you're new friends what you thought of me? Tell my brother? Tell Thomas?"

He wasn't yelling. His voice was still quiet. Too quiet compared to how Remus normally talks. He didn't even sound mad either, which was the worst part. He sounded sad. Janus decided that that was a sound he never wanted to hear again.

"Remus I don't think-"

"Then why would you say it?"

"I.."

He didn't know. That was the honest answer. He didn't know and that... that confused and hurt him almost as much as it did Remus. Why did he say it?

"I don't know, Remus."

"You don't know?"

"I don't know. I just... I just said it."

"... Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay. I'm gonna take a walk, Janus. I'll be back... eventually."

"Remus I-"

"Just... I won't be home before dinner, don't save me a plate."

•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•

" 'we still love you' 'of course youre still my hero' Bullshit. It's all BULLSHIT." Roman yelled at the the sky. He went to the Imagination, of course. He couldn't go to his room right now.

"Who could love me, huh?!?! I'm a big jerk, I'm certainly no one's hero so.. what AM I??" Roman stood there, in the middle of the forest. Screaming at nothing in particular, but also everything. He wiped the tears off his face. He was crying now. Fantastic.

"who am I?!" he whispered this time

Roman was sobbing now. He sank down to the ground and sat there for a while. Just sobbing. And though he asked the question, he didn't expect an answer. He wanted one, but he didn't get one. Did he deserve one?

"You're my brother."

Oh. There's an answer. He turned around.

"Remus?"

"You're the good creativity. You're a prince."

2 more answers to the same question.

"What are you doing here?"

"You certainly have a lot of questions today."

Remus went to sit next Roman.

"You uh, you heard all that huh?"

Remus shrugged "Most of it."

"Oh. You're unusually quiet."

"So are you."

"True. So, what happened to you?"

"What happened to me? Dude, what happened to you? I'm not the one screaming at the sky."

"No, but you do that for fun. You forget, we grew up together. We were one person once. I know what you're like when you're upset."

"Yeah, I guess I am. Just a bit."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Do you think I'm evil?"

The question shocked him. It was just another question he didn't know the answer to. Add that to the list.

"I'm... I'm not sure."

"Agh!!!! Janus said that too!" Remus picked up a rock and threw it towards the nearest tree.

He stood up and looked like he was about to walk away.

"Remus let me explain. I don't think you're evil. But I'm supposed to. I'm supposed to do a lot of stuff." Roman said with a dry laugh

"Ah so that's what this is about then? Can't keep up with your responsibilities anymore, bro bro?" Remus asked

"I just, I can't be there for Thomas anymore. I'm in the way."

"Roman don't..." Remus said softly, knowing what he was getting at.

"Thomas already has you. So really what does he need me for?"

"Roman, I refuse to take over your job for you." Remus said, firmer this time

"You don't have to. No one has to fill the empty slot. In a way it's been empty for a while. Thomas will be fine if I'm..." Roman trailed off

"Roman no. No he won't, he needs you."

"I'm gonna... I'm gonna go to my room for a while, okay?"

"What? No! No not okay! Roman get back here!!" Remus called

But he had already disappeared into the forest. Remus knew who he had to go to now. Someone who had experience with this kind of thinking. But man, he was not gonna want to see him

Taglist:

@theyluna-womoon

@justsomebandomtrash

Look I KNOW this probably wont happen considering Virgils previous shown attitude towards the dark sides, but I just want virgil to hear someone call janus by his name and like immediately become more chill with him like I want this to happen:

Virgil:*acts like his usual normal self around the dark sides, all hissy and upset and disliking*

Patton: so janus-

Virgil, visibly relaxing: oh thank fuck, we're all chill now? All good? Janus you're the best, I fucking missed you, how has remus been? Still killing ladybugs? Still being batshit?

Everyone but Janus and remus, who expected this: *shocked pikachu face*