Drink by Numbers!
In response to recent allegations that Anheuser-Busch has been watering down its beer to boost profits, my lab recently used gas chromatography with flame ion detection to determine if this was indeed the case. Based on our findings, it is clear that Budweiser is, and shall remain, the king of beers. Beer lovers around the world can continue to drink soundly with the knowledge that their euphoria and elevated levels of self-confidence are in no way psychosomatically induced. Budweiser continues to be the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.