Four years plus one more later * Christina Says Things
This time last year I was getting ready to visit San Fransisco. I was excited about this trip only because I was finally completing the last process of my second citizenship. However, the light heartedness of this trip didn’t last long. I was pulled and I was pushed into situations that were beyond my control. I was tested, I was pressed on harder then I think was necessary. I also realized in those passing months that my anxiety was not gone, it had been dormant. I also noticed that I was still having my ups and downs in moods. I recognized the the dark feelings, and the indecisiveness. So, I started writing more. I started making myself do things that I knew I loved before I felt myself slipping further. I made myself face the heaviness. And trust me that was hard! I am still a work in progress, but as of right now, four years and plus one more later I am learning ways to release all that negativity. Below I am sharing with you a poem I wrote in July of 2017. Mind you my state of mind at that time was in a very dark place, and even if it doesn’t not reflect it in the poem, know that this poem helped me come to terms with a rough patch. Take my hand Hold me now Even when I ask you to let go, please don’t No one sees me, not like you No one cares that I’m here, just you I feel invisible I feel lost, like nothing I’m scared I’m falling I don’t want to feel invisible anymore Hold me Take my hand Tell me things I need to hear Make things better Show me the way Please don’t stop seeing me. Never stop believing in me Pick me off the ground Take me home Take my hand Make me feel not so invisible If you are going through a hard time, please tell some one. If you have no one, I’ll be your ear! Sound off in the comments if you have a healthy way of releasing your demons. I’d love to hear some of your ideas. Until next time, please take care!