youlol.net
How life should be
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get in the end of it? Death. What's that...a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. (1) You should die first, you know, start out dead, get it out of the way. You wake up in a an old age home, feeling better every day. (2) You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. (3) You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, play golf, you're generally promiscuous (hey, you've only got a few years left, what's the big deal?!?) and you get ready for High School. (4) Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, and, finally, you become a baby; (5) The last step, you spend your last 9 months floating peacefully with luxuries like central heating, spa, room [...]