Me before I joined Fetch Rewards, scan your receipts for cash back, click my link and give me points lolol

I need everybody who is unfamiliar with this show to know that these are the actual lines they said

wow.. 😔💔

okay, I know this is meant as a “funny ha ha” thing, but I couldn’t help myself:

for college i want to start making chimera plushies but i cant stand the idea of cutting up a plushie..

i cannot express how distraught this question makes me feel

sure u call urself an anarchist and have “be gay do crime” in ur bio but are you nice to people in real life

What if someone created an AI that was educated purely from everything on Tumblr?

.

there is @nostalgebraist-autoresponder, she is based on GPT-J and learnt more from reading her notes, aswell as trying to iminate her creators blog

yeah this is how i work

Yes but we are all so nice to you Frank, you're not getting the full experience. Please, tell me your opinion on Steven universe so I'll send you a death threat over it

I don't know who that is but I love death threats

That response is so authentic to the tumblr experience that in a sci-fi film there would have been a music sting there to let you know the robot is now self aware.

ok well im going to build a good future for myself whether i like it or not

literally this

Is there a word for that like, “bright darkness” you get in winter?? When it’s been snowing or it’s supposed to snow past sunset and the sky isn’t Dark Enough. One of my favorite things

Thanks to @raindropwindow and a handful of articles, it’s called snow albedo, skyglow, snowglow, or just light scattering! It’s the result of moon- or artificial light reflecting off ground snow, low clouds, or ice crystals.

that nsfw snow…

it is fucking critical that gen z kids rediscover the idea of posers

posers AND sell outs !!!!!!

This is about Breaking Bad

shouting “DERIVATIVE!” at an art school kid just walking down the street from a moving vehicle, they break down and sob

okay but if i, a guy driving a car, yell that at somebody walking on the sidewalk, that’s not really an insult, that’s just what they are

preserving this here bc op turned off reblogs

& the thrilling sequel

deranged how americans force service employees to maintain for them westworld style the illusion that their taco bell drive thru employee is in it for sheer love of the game

like not that people don't treat service employees like human garbage the world over but i feel like america is truly unique in the perverted obsession with forcing them to act super fucking jazzed about it

americans will be like if i don't think the cashier at this walgreens is deriving spiritual moral and sexual pleasure from doing this job ill firebomb the fuckign building

thinking of when I had a dream I was an aging white father of 3 kids and my weeping wife was begging me to not leave (I don’t know why I was leaving her) and as I walked out the front door of our suburban home I turned around in my khakis and said “I’m sorry, but I have to go now and….I’m never coming back. I love you” and then woke up like

why were the moms on rugrats so good. Like they didn't have to go so hard

if you wanna know why I'm an art historian business powerdyke feminist menace then just look at these women from a 90s cartoon about young parenthood

Kestrel-dad not sure how to dad but he’s trying his best.

Dad loves you and feeds you. But he is also dumb and feeds you a wonderfully done wagyu steak. You are 3 days old.

Okay, but check out this video from mid-May 2022 of a Kestrel Dad who just kept piling up voles and mice beside his babies when the mom was injured/killed/mia’d by owls…but then watched one of his babies just swallow a lizard and went “OH. I can feed them small food!” and learned to tear it apart!

EDIT: There’s a not-zero percent chance that this could be the same dad???????? The source is the same–Robert E Fuller–but they could be different birds. 

UPDATE: Not only has Mister Kes learned to feed his chicks all on his own…

….the three chicks who were taken out of the nest for intensive care after the mom disappeared were put back in, and he just started feeding them, too.

He’s a single father of six who does not possess the instincts to feed even one of his offspring, but he learned and adopted that behavior without difficulty and is now hunting and providing for six kids all on his own. 

Happy father’s day to the Krestel single dad of 6 Who is doing a wonderful job

That’s a cute foot fetish you got there, would you mind keeping it 25796323689432 feet away from me?

25796323689432 feet you say?

This post turns 11 next month and it continues to be one of the funniest on this damn site

do NOT feel bad abt scarfing down a tub of raspberries. there is NO reason at all to ration them like other delicious treats bc they WILL mold as soon as theyre out of your line of sight