What can the harvest hope for?

Things cats were right about all along:

Hate it when you have An Appointment in a few days and you're like well now I have no time to do anything at all because there is An Appointment in my future

“…use things to have good days.”

the loading screen trying to convince me to use even one of my 3000 consumables

THE GOOD PLACE | 1.04

LOL I QUOTE THIS SO OFTEN!

horatio’s epilogue

maybe me and youuuu

not enough of a spotlight is shown on Ratthi and Gurathin in Fugitive Telemetry. SecUnit isn't allowed to hack government security systems so it invites its Two Best Guy Friends to come watch it break into a transport ship, AND BOTH OF THEM ARE LIKE "sure thing, sounds fun" ?? They put up the weakest "are you sure this is a good idea?" argument but otherwise just do what SecUnit needs (which is stand in front of security cameras and act as character witnesses). SecUnit's narration also implies that it would have just let its Two Best Guy Friends tag along for the rest of its murder investigation, for funsies, except the cops said no (booooo).

later THE SAME DAY, SecUnit (famously allergic to asking for help) messages their group chat "I need help" with ZERO context, which gives Ratthi and Gurathin such a shock they almost knock their table over. then it facetimes them from the NATIONAL HISTORY MUSEUM to ask which of these Preserved Artifacts works best for jetting out into space? and Ratthi and Gurathin are like, "that one with the red tags, but ummm why?"

"don't worry about it," it says, "I'll tell you later."

then it HANGS UP and they don't hear from it for the rest of the day.

just a day in the life.

Also, Ratthi may have already had theater tickets, but he might have also thought his friend SecUnit was having a rough day and live theater would help, then had Dr. Mensah each out with the invite.

BABY!

Thinking about murderbot being a rental unit and how that interacts with its trauma

Bc like. The most important bots it meets are all from vastly different situations and backgrounds than it. ART has been valued and loved by humans its whole life - its dad is literally the captain and its sister is one of its crew! And they clearly cherish, love, and value ART. Miki is a less sophisticated bot, but also so clearly loved and cherished. They ordered it to protect itself! And it had the capability to reject that order! That says a lot about the love, trust, and mutual respect they had for one another.

Even Three, another secunit, seems pretty different from murderbot. It was made by the company it’s working for and the vibe I got was that it and the other two secunits were sort of permanently assigned to that ship?

Which, look. Humans imprint on anything and build familiarity. The more time we spend with something the more sentimental we might get about it. If Three was on that ship for a long time, I wouldn’t be shocked if at least some of the humans on board were pretty chill or even affectionate towards it (in a condescending and dehumanizing way probably, but still). And even so, the length of time spent around the same secunits clearly allowed Three to establish bonds with its fellow secunits if nothing else!

But being a rental unit means murderbot went from group to group. The other secunits it worked with were always Temporary Company (will never see them again after this contract likely) and also Active Threats to murderbot bc they’re the most likely to notice murderbot is rogue and be forced to report it. Even the humans were Temporary, so even if there were Nice Humans they’d be swapped out with Bad Humans soon enough.

Like. No wonder it insists it doesn’t have friends. If you don’t have Feelings about people then those feelings can’t be hurt when you’re inevitably torn away and never allowed to see them again (or have your very memories of them torn out of you and erased)

(Feelings about media are okay because the media can go with you, right?)

It’s funny to point at Three when murderbot makes sweeping generalization about secunits bc it’s an unreliable narrator but also. Just having feelings about how specifically being a rental unit effects murderbot and its relationships to others

A porcupine’s Halloween present (+ original sound effects)

I had no idea giant porcupines made fucking precious sounds

THAT’S THE SOUND IT MAKES!?!?!?

UN-BE-FUCKING-LIEVABLE 

We got asked if this is cute and okay. I can very happily say yes, this is stupid cute and those are happy porcupine noises. 

One of my favorite things about doing zoo work was all the noises you never realize the animals make when they’re excited or interested in a new thing. Coatimundis squeak and snuffle, and giant porcupines make that sound. 

Omgggg the sounds.

Teddy is back on my dash and all is right with the world

WE ALMOST TO OCTOBRE POST OF PUNKINBEARS

HI TEDDY I MISSED YOU

Happy October, everyone! Have some pumpkins and a happy porcupine!

asking for praise for a thing you made feels so humiliating like oooh look at me I’m a little animal and I did a trick and made a thing can I have pets and treats about it. and then somebody tells you it’s good and you understand why golden retrievers are the way they are

bingewatching will never come close to bingereading. there is nothing like blocking out the entire Earth for ten hours to read a book in one sitting no food no water no shower no bra and emerging at the end with no idea what time it is or where you are, a dried-up prune that's sensitive to light and loud noises because you've been in your room in the dark reading by the glow of a single LED. it's like coming back after a three-month vacation in another dimension and now you have to go downstairs and make dinner. absolutely transcendental

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

@tvarchive TV APPRECIATION WEEK || day 3: favourite tv genre (sitcom)

ART: hmm not so sure about this Tarik guy. He's been part of my crew for over a year, but i still think his background in the corporation rim makes him potentially too unstable for anti-corporate espionage. Hello, rogue secunit i have known for approximately a week and a half and who I watched slaughter an entire shuttle of corporates that one time. I have decided you will make all security decisions instead.

MB, employing powers of selective hearing usually only seen in humans: ART doesnt trust Tarik? I mean, neither do I but still .... This is bad news for me. If ART doesn't trust Tarik after knowing him for a year, what does that say about how it feels about me? If only there were some way to get ART to trust me ......... Anyways time to respond to the mission critical security decision ART is demanding I make and the others listen to me about.

Murderbot + text posts [59/∞]

Looking back on 2020, I think it's hilarious that Wellerman of all shanties is the one that blew up online. It's not a song about life on the high seas or adventuring

It's the "Where the fuck is my delivery" song

On Shopping While Fat 2: Son of Fat

Personal gold stars

What if murderbot is hot. That wouldnt make any difference it would just be really funny. It would hate that

This is hilarious to me because Gurathin is possibly the last person in the world Murderbot would want to learn this from. No one is allowed to think it's hot but Gurathin is especially Not Allowed

Gurathin leaning in the doorway of the room Murderbot is in, Ratthi clearly visible making frantic NO DON’T gestures behind him, in a tone of both boredom and intellectual curiosity: hey we’ve been discussing it and you’re attractive by human standards. how do you feel about this

murderbot: i am either going to shut down or kill you and you have three seconds to start running before i decide

actively losing it