please spread this so that it can actually be funny instead of just 1 person voting

obsessed with this random-ass blog that showed up in my messages, accused me of being a past lover, and immediately blocked me

i have never once used a dating app before

what the hell, man

haha yeah his pussy was insa— oh sorry his pussy was neurodivergent

When I was a kid one of my moms would call her period "moon time" or "her monthlies" or shit like that and my other mom straight up stealthed it, but when I'm a dad I think I'm gonna go straight down the middle and call it Werewolf Week. Like sorry kids, dad can't roughouse right now, it's Werewolf Week

"one of my moms"

*points finger*

child of lesbiabs

I actually have six parents and three moms total but they're all straight as far as I'm aware

Polyamorous parents or divorce?

Turbo divorce

What the heck is a turbo divorce?

It's when you end up with six parents

Overcocked? That cat is burnt!

i love stuff like this, some videos don't need commentary or loud noises to be funny

[ID: A hand pointing to an edited poster from the Simpsons with text in all caps that says, "Don't forget: Theythemming trans women and men and non-binary people who dont use they is still misgendering" /End ID.]

And like, intersex people. Pls start including us in this kind of stuff.

junji ito whip gif

Reblog if you think asexuality is a legitimate sexuality.

I'm trying to prove something.

Reblog if your blog is a safe place for asexuals.

Me is ace :3

thank you solid snake

thank you solid snake

thank you solid snake

so bc i am a Gross Dude my friends i and sometimes rate our burps and my coworker (who is a teen girl) burped in front of me once and i instinctively rated it

so now every time she burps she looks to me hopefully for a rating and bc she has delicate little baby burps i now have to create an entirely new Burp Rating System unique to her bc i rate anything below a 5 and she looks at me like this

I think I've worked out (part of the reason) why there's been such a huge uptick in folks who don't reblog things on here.

This post has like 14k notes right now, and the tags and comments and reblogs are FULL of people who didn't know about fast-reblog, and -- you guys have been slow-reblogging this whole time!?!??!?!?

In the interests of a) making your lives easier, and b) encouraging you to reblog posts, which is what keeps this site alive, here's how you fast-reblog:

You're welcome. Now get reblogging.

as someone who lives by tags i'm begging everyone to at least try @new-xkit-extension /x-kit rewritten!!! hover over the reblog button and tag without leaving the dash, my beloved... among 8 million other indispensable features. i don't get how ppl use tumblr w/o it. <3

beautiful boy 🐇🏳️‍⚧️

(HE/HIM)

I'm a Transgender man despite my appearance, I don't want to conform to gender norms and I'm happier that way. I love being a boy ^⁠_⁠^ 🏳️‍⚧️💜

also....I think I got better at drawing faces...

@guiltiest-gear

I’m tired of people acting like Zhongli is a serious and chill guy who would never cause problems on purpose as if he isn’t one of the biggest menaces out of the Seven. He used to throw mountains at Venti for annoying him. He, the god of history, starts fights among historians for shits and giggles. He tried to gaslight the Traveler into thinking he was totally not at the Chasm guys really Aether/Lumine you must be seeing things maybe you should go see Baizhu. When Qiqi wanted “Cocogoat” milk he was like “Oh yeah sure totally let’s go look for it” knowing damn well it was a wild goose chase. He made the Traveler sing to a flower and then was like “Oh would you look at that” when a Whooperflower jumped out to maul them. I love him. He’s like a cat pushing things off the counter to see how people react. I would pay to see him interact directly with Neuvillette because I know for a fact he’d get on that man’s nerves and argue about water tasting just to feel something. Furina used freedom from godhood to take a nap and Zhongli used it to give psychic damage to anyone who talks to him longer than 5 minutes. Iconic.

He's continually improving on that record. Soon he'll be able to give psychic damage with just 3 minutes of exposure—

...oh. That's why he's working for Director Hu. He's taking notes.

Eugh! Blegh! Ptooey!

Tumblr users will see a post mentioning a day if the week and just fucking black out and reblog it

happy tuesday wednesday

Happy Tuesday Wednesday Thursday.

Happy Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday

Happy Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday