new novel is about grief and the ocean and small town northern california and realising your father may be a bad person and teenage lesbian self discovery and dreams and attempting to escape reality. if you were wondering

rereading the great my chemical romance novel of 2022 is very funny because like. is this a good piece of writing? i cannot say. but it is a very beautiful time capsule of my terrible sexuality crisis + incredibly intense band related feelings that is so personally revealing it is probably a good thing i cannot publish it. my wan little husk i guess. anyway very glad i have moved forward as a person since then

shinji is always so sad that "no one cares about him" but misato is TRYING and he is just ignoring it. i get that it is the point as neither of them are able to form true connection due to inner walls etc but. she obviously cares so much :( the tragedy of eva is that these characters are all so close to understanding and helping each other and yet in the end it is impossible

oh so the boy and the heron is about the dead mom as a protective force? yeah great theme :) one i feel very normal about :)

y/n feels so obsessed with analyzing the weirdness of fandom that it’s missing any element of humanity. like being a fan is about love and connection actually. show her connecting with her kpop boy or other fans or something. i know nothing about why she likes this guy other than that she’s projecting feelings about some guy she broke up with onto him which. yawn could you pick a more boring angle

reading y/n by esther yi and its attitude towards kpop so far reminds me very much of how i was when i first got into it which is not a good thing i don’t think. like i understand feeling as if you are uniquely weird and crazy for being into kpop and writing fic or whatever especially if you consider yourself someone who is “smart” or has “good taste” but like. in the end being a fan of a massively popular band is actually quite normal.

david lynch: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called “twin peaks” 🪄🔮😳 you’ll be zonked out of your gourd 💯

me: yeah whatever. i don’t feel shit.

5 minutes later: your cousin looks almost exactly like laura palmer

my buddy dale cooper pacing: the owls are not what the seem

in eoe when asuka says her mom has been protecting her all along through the at field it is of course a reference to her mom's soul being inside the eva but also. considering what we know about how the at fields are the inner walls we possess there's this added second layer of meaning that through her death, which was the very thing that caused asuka to become so closed off and distant from others around her, asuka's mother was protecting her, making that inner wall harder to breach and in doing so making the at field stronger but at the cost of well. her mental well being