Rannva

He’s so cool

fixed it

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

*gathers all of the people in the world who write the number 7 with a little dash in the center of it so I can study them like little critters and find out what makes them do that*

[Video ID: a TikTok that starts with a person asking "What's a word you pronounced incorrectly one time and it still haunts you to this day?" The video cuts to Justin Timberlake, who takes a pause then says, "Uh.... 'me'." /End video ID.]

Realistically, a household the size of Wayne Manor needs more than just a butler, and while Bruce might imagine he can keep his proclivities secret from his own domestic staff, Alfred certainly harbours no such illusions. I've gotta wonder what the orientation lecture he's worked out looks like. Like, of course they're going to be extensively vetted before they ever set foot on the premises, but at some point during the onboarding process the subject of the Batcave has gotta come up – I just wanna know how Alfred broaches that.

serious answer: it’s the sex dungeon, and everyone knows it’s the sex dungeon, and alfred is extremely good at getting across the point, in his Very Proper Butler Accent, that domestic staff don’t get to go anywhere near the sex dungeon EVEN WITH an airtight nda contract because someone at some point tried to leak pics to the gossip mags and alfred had to murder them and it was annoying. alfred takes care of the sex dungeon himself. if you find a secret passage on accident you stop and immediately go tell alfred, so he can close the security hole, because if you follow the secret passage yourself and end up in the sex dungeon, he murders you. also if you ever so much as say the words ‘sex dungeon’ he murders you.

funny answer: everyone knows the batcave is underneath the sex dungeon because everyone knows bruce wayne is batman’s sugar daddy.

Oh my god, though, because if 'it's a sex dungeon' is the implied cover story there is a 100 percent certainty that Bruce 'contingency-awareness' Wayne has built a sex dungeon down there

Like, the clock leads to a tunnel that leads to the sex dungeon and in the back of the sex dungeon behind the leather pommel horse and the rack of whips is a secret door leading to the batcave. Please take a moment to imagine with me the first time Bruce takes Clark down to the cave through the house.

The creator of Phineas and Ferb sorting his M&Ms on tiktok bc that's just what he does. as a middle aged man.

its tagged Stimming and ADHD. "i dont know why [i sorted the M&Ms]" sure you didnt. Autistic ADHD man made a show of autistic ADHD characters.

Peer reviewed ADHD

how do people come up with titles?

why can't we just number fics like classical composers did with their stuff?

"tentacle porn No. 8 in [fandom], [pairing], op. 57"

that would solve so many problems

You could if you weren’t a coward.

Stretching isn’t enough I need to be able to disassemble my body like legos

Loser baby emos ;)

what the actual fuck

we did it everyone. we’re no longer allowed to talk about the CISGENDER MALE CHEST because it’s sexually explicit

i hate when i send someone a meme in another language and they're like "uhm... translate? 😒" fucker i sent you a meme where 90% of the words have an english cognate and/or you don't need to know what they're saying to find it funny. can you at least TRY

i sent this meme to 7 people, and 4 of them asked me to translate for them. i legitimately do not think that was necessary.

Is Chris Evans Steve Rogers or is Steve Rogers Chris Evans?

good

“Fellas, is it gay to be a good father?”

Shout out to Harry Hill

I think Piers is somewhat of a national laughing stock by now

if I don’t reblog a good burn on piers morgan, assume I’m dead

The logic of “Brands will only hop on the train if they can prove it’s profitable” makes it so much funnier when they clown on this fool. “Yeah we crunched the numbers and we found it to be profitable to call this clown out in public. Jacob hit the post button.”

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

Don’t do this to me

my brother in christ you made the post

@baddywronglegs

And then they tag you in every other viral post so your virality can become other people's problem too.

did I ever tell yall I used to think charlie chaplin was a drag king. for like three years straight

we watched modern times in seventh grade n I saw this shot n just took it face value that he was a twinky butch. for three years

I only found out he wasn’t because in tenth grade the topic of old hollywood leading ladies came up w my friends n I went “I think it’s so cool how charlie chaplin did all those drag roles. she was cute too haha” n they all looked at me like I’d said something just truly fucking insane. which for the record I had

no the butch you want is Dorothy Arzner, one of the only women directors from the silent era to continue directing after the transition to sound

she directed a multitude of films about atypical domestic relationships and has two entries in the criterion collection. you should absolutely read about her life, because wow. fascinating figure

SWOON!!!

fuck it. kafcake

gregor cake is 1 years old today<3

Poll: if your mom remarries when you’re 26 years old is that guy still your stepdad or is he just your mom’s husband.

The poll winner seems to be “depends on whether you like him” which is super valid.

Mine watches fox news so “mom’s husband” it is!

My family has a great way of distinguishing between a new spouse you like and new spouse you disdain!

Your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are actually a cool person, you use their first name. So if you were to introduce them they would be: Aunt Jane and Bob.

If your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are a fuckwad you introduce them as: this is Aunt Jane and her second husband. The implication being that they are very replaceable and that we’re all just waiting for her to wise up to the situation and serve you divorce papers, she did it once, she can do it again.

MAGNIFICENT

Alright, but what if my mom on her third marriage found a decent man, but my mother herself is shitty

"my stepdad's wife"

@sapphic-sargent your tags omg

You are doing God’s work

Why do people need subtitles to watch a show in English? I don't get it. What is wrong with the ears of young people?

Modern movies and shows tend to have very unbalanced mixing. Also, a common trend in modern movies is more realistic dialogue (mumbling) that is not as crisp as it was in previous eras of film making.

I’m eating corn chips and they be crunchy and loud as hell and also I’m half deaf I think