i think the coolest thing would be to see a new color

*lies in the sun for 5 mins*

wheres my tan

DID THEY EVER THANK HIM

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

people that point out acne:

you give my butterflies…… but not even in a cute way anymore talking to you gives me anxiety and I’m terrified about everything I say I’m so dumb

How I view my Tumblr audience: 

How it actually is: 

when people casually mention something you’re completely obsessed with and it takes every fuckin ounce of your self control not to propel yourself into the stars and scream for the rest of eternity about how much you love the thing

how to get a hot body: set yourself on fire

avoiding responsibilities like

do you ever just want to hold someone in your arms for about 37 years

reblog if you are cute and hilarious