actually u r so young and have so much to live for and experience and that lil voice in your head saying ur behind in life is a liar !!! there is no ‘behind’ as life is a continuous journey. how can u be behind in something that is so magical?
We failed as a society when everyone stopped wearing headphones.
At my parents place with 2 children watching YT on tablets and 2 adults watching tiktoks and reels on their phones and trying not to summon a comically sized Loony Toons hammer out of my back pocket to smash them all.
WOULD’VE, COULD’VE, SHOULD’VE - Taylor Swift & Aaron Dessner The Eras Tour: Nashville, TN Night 3 (May 7, 2023)
Source: tiktok.com
Thinking about 13 Latvias again
I genuinely belive this is the funniest fucking thing we will ever get from reddit
babygirl I'm bothered by noises you wouldn't even hear
wrote this about sensory issues but people relating because of hallucinations or tinnitus or anything else I am shaking your hand in solidarity if you are comfortable with that
i just want a simple life !! i want to eat well and feel whole and laugh and love!! why do simple things seem so out of reach sometimes?
spilling a drink is one of the deepest pains imaginable. the loss of delicious liquids. the knowledge your adult ass needs a little no-spill baby sippy cup. now you have to clean instead of enjoy your delicious beverage and pray that the ants dont discover youre a god damn fool
idk when we decided that explaining yourself shouldn't be part of an apology but like. if someone was a dick to me and apologizes but I still don't understand why they did it I'm not gonna feel any better
"Sorry for hurting your feelings earlier. I was trying to say x, but I guess it came across wrong. I don't think you're stupid."
or
"Sorry I snapped at you. I didn't get enough sleep last night so my patience is a little low today."
is a better apology than
"I want you to know that I am sorry that my actions offended you. I take full accountability for my actions and I am listening and learning. I hear you."
OP allow me to introduce you to my 5 part apology
- Statement of regret
- What happened
- Why what happened happened
- A plan to do better
- Reassurance
Both of your apologies up there follow the steps pretty well.
"Sorry for hurting your feelings earlier. I was trying to say x, but I guess it came across wrong. I don't think you're stupid." "Sorry I snapped at you. I didn't get enough sleep last night so my patience is a little low today."
Depending on the situation, you don’t need to follow all 5 parts every time, but I would consider a full and complete apology:
“Sorry for hurting your feelings earlier. I was trying to say x, but I guess it came out wrong. I’ll try to work on my wording in the moment. I don’t think you’re stupid” and “Sorry I snapped at you. I didn’t get enough sleep last night so my patience is a little low today. I’ll work on not externalizing that. I’m not mad at you.”
The reason why these steps work so well is because they follow the steps of problem solving. When solving a problem, you have to
- Identify there is a problem to be solved
- Identify what it is
- Figure out its cause
- Come up with a plan
- Execute said plan
If we build problem solving into our apologies, we may solve our problems and miscommunications a lot easier imo
i feel like no one really wants to hear that sleep/exercise/nutrition/hydration are major factors in treating mental health issues bc we’ve all talked to that person who thinks your depression would be cured by one good session of goat yoga or whatever but unfortunately they do help and i’m chronically annoyed about it
also even just missing one meal can tank your mental health, so chronically undereating can really significantly impact your mental health (and physical health to a huge degree!)
dude kevin the sea cucumbers “hat” was actually his nuts and his goons fucking ripped it off
My therapist: just because you made a plan doesn’t mean you’ll always follow it perfectly, and that’s okay. It’s better to follow a plan cursorily than not at all.
Me, sobbing: THAT WAS AN OPTION???
Oh, this is super important.
⠀
When trying new coping strategies or learning a new habit, you’ll fail. Possibly many many times.
But that’s alright! No one just PICKS it up immediately.
⠀
You’re trying to learn to do it sometimes, and then occasionally, and then more often than not, and finally every time!
Similarly, you might fail in any plan or timetable you’re trying to use.
But that’s alright!
As OP’s therapist said, it doesn’t have to be perfect! In fact, no one can pick it up immediately.
⠀
Doing things OCCASIONALLY is better than not doing it at all.
Doing things LATE is better than not doing it at all.
Doing things PARTIALLY is better than not doing it at all.
Also don’t aim for perfection. Just aim for as best you can, ideally a little better than last time. But? There will be ups and downs. That isn’t a flaw in you or your techniques, it’s just how people work.
i’ve heard a lot of people say “don’t reach out to your friends first and see how many people will remain in your life. those are your true friends” and i get it. it sucks and it’s tiring constantly being the one to message first, to initiate hang outs but don’t take this so literally. some friendships require initiation. i have lost touch with so many people who genuinely cared about me and wanted me in their life because i stopped reaching out. it’s a hard pill to swallow but honestly some people just suck at it and it doesn’t mean they don’t love and value you. i’ve reconnected with some people over the past few months and it’s crazy how genuinely happy they are to see me and how engaged they are in the conversation. i just think sometimes we’re too harsh on each other & too quick to emphasize other peoples flaws and remove them from our lives but then we’ll all be alone and what’s the point of life then!!!!
I think it’s really important also to figure out if it’s just the means of reaching out that doesn’t work. my best friend sucks at text conversations, and after talking about it we now schedule in video calls and make sure to plan seeing each other in person every few months. not everyone communicates in the same way! it’s ok!! but please please please talk to your friends about it before cutting them off. there could be a better way
honestly will never forget this older client we had who told me how her life had gotten so much better with time and age and asked how old I was and when I told her I was 28, she said I was just a baby and reassured me I had so much time ahead of me and how much better it'll get as I grow into my life. There was such an indescribable amount of love and hope in that single interaction I think I'll hold it with me forever.