O M G

All hail King Kaneki! ^^ I miss him so much, so I did this little something. ~

…you laugh, but I did literally once reach for a soothing sip of tea and find a dead freakin’ moth hot tubbin.

Tour 8: Naka-Meguro.

こんにちわ!　

Today I went to Naka-Meguro, because, well, it was a holiday and I felt like doing something slightly cosmopolitan in the afternoon. Also, it didn’t rain, which is always a good reason – at least considering that it did rain yesterday and the day before, the two days that coincidentally make up the weekend. So, Naka-Meguro: I had heard that it is supposed to be a hipster place, a bit like Daikanyama – indeed, it’s the stop after Daikanyama on the Fukutoshin Line, so a certain alignment of vibe and style seem likely and appropriate. I was quite amazed by the area, it really is très hipster, with nice shops and funky-dressed people and coffee and all that hipster baseline entertainment. Now, one sensible and convincing point of critique about this is that you could find the near-precisely same setup of consumerist établissements in London, Melbourne, New York or Portland, Oregon (apparently that’s hipster, too) – the hipster subculture is in fact neither “sub-” nor very authentic, it’s generic, global, mainstreamed and basically just a subcurrent of Capitalism, rather than a ‘cool countermovement’. Nevertheless, leaving all this leftist philosophizing aside, it’s just fun to see expensive stuff that was made in supposedly super-cool ways by super-cool people. It’s just hipster.

So, let’s get some photos started!

At this point I should probably mention that it was a rather cloudy and grey day, so you’ll find a lot of B/W photos further down; I think I’ve explained in an older post that it there are no colours, it just makes sense to ban them alltogether, rather than frickeling around with some washed-out leftovers.

Anyway, that concrete canal that is absolutely not natural is about as much nature as Naka-Meguro has to offer – I guess it’s like with tropical heat or suger in British food, you just adapt your standards to the contextualities. So, this is natural!!

P.S.: That was referring to the awkwardly high sugar content in Domino’s tomato sauce. Tomato sauce does not need sugar. No sugar, at all.

That’s what I meant, not much colour coming up…

Huuu, I found some! Green, yay. That’s what the concrete-canal-promenade looks like, it’s quite nice actually with those trees. The shops are on both sides of the canal along that promenade, so you get a nice shopping-strolling-experience.

I bumped into this on my way around Naka-Meguro Station; look at the contrast between these two ethically responsible and environmentally friendly means of transport.

“Sidewalk Stand” serve Allpress coffee, which I happen to know from Allpress’ branch in Shoreditch – this is a prime example for the global nature of hipsterity that I was ranting about earlier. It’s supposed to be cool and special and unique, but they sell it on at least three different continents. Probably four.

If the woman hadn’t been there, it’d be boring, but she was there, so it’s great.

Enough colour for the next 100 phlog posts: Rainbow cycles! So cool, so retro, so hipster.

Even more colour: a weird pig-figure. Elephant figure? Probably some character of some unnecessary and Capitalist Disney comic that I never watched but supposedly should have watched because it’s sooooooooo unbelieeeeevablyyyyyy cuuuuteeeee. Well… it’s a pig-elephant?

Cycle, take-away counter.

Rusty, pink and green. Complimentary colours!!

More pink and green.

Not complimentary: the paternalistic state in symbolizised intervention.

Yellow!

Grey?

I think this is the look towards Shibuya. But that’s wild guessing, I have no actual clue – I just wanted to share my unsubstantiated, unqualified and totally Trump-worthy guess.

A funky tree!

Now this is colourful: a graffiti on a wall.

Woman, car, fence.

Enough colours: Hipster rucksack in front of hipster établissement. It wasn’t actually that dark, by the way, that’s fake, like in the movie night scenes. I wanted to be fake, too, for once.

Hat (and robe) of the day!

Best hipsterity indicator: Nige Cabourn was here before you. This must be hipsterritory!

I had a coffee, too, at the aforementioned Sidewalk Stand with Allpress coffee.

The inside.

A typical Tokyo photo: a big road, big buildings, big everything. Small cars, to be honest, but yeah, mostly big. I like!

These are all the photos I wanted to show (off?). On a different note, though: I just came up with the idea that the anglophone part of mankind should adopt a new vocab, namely “trumping”. This is for two reasons: firstly, it just makes sense to dedicate a word, or a word family, to the Donald, just because he’s so present. Secondly, the German language, which I believe is, or if not should be considered très intellectuelle, has a similar-sounding and similar-signifying word, namely “trompeten” – or, more precisely, “heraustrompeten”, which can roughly be translated to something à la “trumpeting out”. The argument, then, is as follows: if the current polemico-political situation calls for the adoption of the word “to trump”, and if this is supported by an opportunity for root-drawing back to the intellectual German language, then this should be done. Does this sound compelling? If you like it, please start using the word “to trump”. Variations that can be employed are listed below:

to trump – to polemically speak out or raise one’s voice

to trump down – to polemically and personally, vulneratingly denounce

to trump up – to exaggerate, to blow up irrelevancy beyond its natural size, to overstate excruciatingly

trumping (+ noun of communication, e.g. speech, presentation) – a performance that was actually wrong, bad or just hollow, but presented with a whole lot of self-conscience and hairspray

Feel invited to add to this list. Sorry for the politico-creative detour, I thought this idea needed sharing. Please also comment, I never get comments although I’m so keen on interaction with my numerous readers. And even more importantly, please shareshareshare, because I also need readers. Do it! Yes! Make #robertxtokyo GREAT AGAIN!

" Damn " = i ain't listen to shit you just said

K but Why are you exposing me like this

Unpopular opinion: time is linear

I’m no expert but I’m almost certain that’s the most popular opinion

Don’t embarrass me on this fucking website there are girls on here

if you don’t know what 2 heck you’re doing with your life (me) and YOU LOVE PERSONALITY TESTS!!! try this app there’s always new quizzes and it’s super well done to help you know yourself 

from now on, I request that my parents only call me by one of those terms I’M A CREATIVE VISIONARY MOM, NOT A LAZY PIECE OF GARBAGE (ok maybe a bit of both)

this is great to find a career, if only I hadn’t retired from being a blacksmith in 1659

things to take * a nap * it easy * care

* on me

* me on

I don't understand this picture at all but I love it

Evil Egg

hey if you’re under 18 dont post nudes of yourself 

Hey if you’re under 18 do whatever the hell you want with your body because it’s your body

Hey if you’re under 18 and post nudes of yourself that is child pornography.

it always really bothered me when wait staff ignored me + my friends just because we were young bc we are all really respectful people but the assumption was that we wouldn’t tip

anyway so fast fowards to when i became a waitress and one day this group of scrubbyass kids came in and i had 8 other tables with other people to look to but i overheard that one kid wanted a milkshake but he couldn’t afford it and the other kids offered to pay but he was like “nonono it’s fine” and i looked over and he just looked real run down and sad and stuff —- later it just so happened that our kitchen had a mixup so we had an extra shake and since it would just be dumped otherwise, i snuck it out to their table and gave it to him for free

and his friends were so fucking impressed by this they pooled every fucking cent they had i got a $50 tip and later his friend’s mom came in and said “i heard what you did for that boy” and gave me another 20 and offered me a better job working with her

and meanwhile at my other table a rich white guy i was serving complained bc he didn’t want to pay the 15% tip on a $8.90 bill and when his wife said “she’s been a good waitress, though,” he said, “but just plain good isn’t worth 15%”

damn

DANG

This is still one of my favorite stories

im glad whoever made this photo helpfully added a red circle so i could spot the alien but im still not sure where the alien is. could someone please magnify the alien so i can see it. i cant find any

hope this helps

thanks jens but i still dont know what youre showing me. could you point some arrows at it or something. maybe that will help me see it

here you go

thank you for trying to help jens but i dont see anything of interest. could you maybe increase the saturation and exposure on the alien or something. that oughta make it stand out. add a few more circles and arrows too maybe

hope this is helpful

thanks jens this has been really helpful. i dont see anything though. could you magnify it a little bit more 

okay

oh shit is that an alien

yeah

oh wow

same

you must have a lot of tea cups

yes

i am very proud of your collection

hey guys

dude fholy shit

😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

HE GOT THE WRONG ONE LMAO

Go the fuck off

*wakes up* oh no. Not again