@tylersharpies-world / tylersharpies-world.tumblr.com
And I'm absolutely in love with it. I've been waiting for an opportunity to buy one, but my family decided to treat me and get one for me. Along with the waiting to actually get a PS4, I've been putting aside my desire to return to gaming. I dont have many games of different series, but I did get full series collections along with the system. So, armed with the Batman Arkham series and the Kingdom Hearts series (minus 3, but January is almost here!), I venture on!
me as a hotel receptionist: *greets guests by playing hotel california but cutting it off right before they say california*
Just a head’s up, when meat eaters say things like “I’m glad you’re not like most vegans you’re cool about it” what they really mean is “I’m glad you’re silent about animal cruelty so I can eat animals without having to think about it.”
No actually what they likely mean is “I’m glad you’re not like PETA and compare women’s bodies to beef and pork” or “I’m glad you’re not the type of asshole who blames poor people for not being able to afford healthy vegan foods instead of getting upset at the grocery chains who throw out tons and tons of perfectly good produce”
see also: “im glad youre not one of those vegans who compares the meat industry to the holocaust”. anti-semetic, sexist, racist, and classist rhetoric is unfortunately quite common among vegans and it’s disingenuous as hell to act like having an issue with that is silencing vegans.
Also “I’m glad you aren’t one of those vegans who thinks I should put my health on the line”
“I’m glad you don’t harass me over my life choices because you’re a decent fucking human being who realizes that throwing humans under the bus so you can have an ego trip is a shitty thing to do”
Also: I’m glad you’re not one of those vegans who lies about what’s in food they’re feeding me when I ask about my allergens so that I don’t have to risk literally dying
“i’m glad you’re not literally blaming global climate change on me, personally, for liking cheese while corporations dump pollution directly into the ozone by the ton because it saves them a few dollars”
“i’m glad you’re not getting on a moral high horse about animal cruelty while ignoring the human rights abuses that go into farming your vegan faves like quinoa”
THAT LAST ONE
(to the tune of The Final Countdown) it’s a mental breakdown
*off-key kazoo*
After vine died we are reduced to text form vines
Counter Strike: Global Offensive
this guys videos are fucking incredible i really want everyone to watch them
this man is like midas but with knives instead of gold, he can make anything a knife, sicssor knives ,ice knives, cardboard knives, tiny knives if it can be made into a knife he will do it, and if he cant, he will do it anyway because fuck you
This doesn’t even have the best one. One time he made a knife out of ravioli then proceeded to use the knife made out of ravioli to cut up cheese and tomatoes and basil and shit then took the ravioli knife that he had used to cut up his other ingredients and cooked said knife with those ingredients and ate the fucking knife!
ate the fucking knife
Let’s not forget everything else in his videos.
Listen my dudes Ancient Egypt existed for a really fuckass long time. Literally just Pharaonic civilization lasted 3,000 years. That’s not even including predynastic civilization and Roman rule. If you lump that in you’re looking at more like… 5,000 years. Like. If you want a comparison of how long that is: THE YEAR IS CURRENTLY 2018. TWO THOUSAND. TWO-THIRDS OF ANCIENT EGYPTIAN PHARAONIC CIVILIZATION HAVE HAPPENED SINCE THE ‘BIRTH OF JESUS CHRIST’ We comparatively just entered the Third Intermediate Period. The Greeks will not take over for another 700~ years. Cleopatra will not be born until the year 2931.
It’s a really long time guys.
Anyway look. Listen. I sat my ass down and wrote out a timeline of “when shit happened if you started at 1AD” because I know backwards numbers are hard to process but here’s an abridged version. If the first Egyptian Pharaoh came to power in 1AD then…
300: step pyramid built 450: Great Pyramid at Giza built 815: Pepi II dies and civil war breaks out 950: Egypt re-unified 1350: Middle Kingdom ends 1450: New Kingdom begins 1520: Hatshepsut is on the throne 1650: Ahkenaten switches to monotheistic religion and builds a new city 1680: Tutankhamun dies 1720: Ramesses II ‘the great’ ascends to the throne 1740: World’s first peace treaty signed 1790: Ramesses II dies leaving way too many children 1920: Egypt breaks into 2 states again And now we get to ~~~~the future~~~~. If we started at 1AD all of this stuff hasn’t happened yet 2050: Briefly re-united as a single state 2180: Civil war 2250: Nubian kings take over 2335: Assyrian conquest 2665: Alexander the Great conquers Egypt 2930: Cleopatra VII born 2970: Cleopatra VII dies. Egypt falls to Rome. Fin.
And that’s just starting with the Pharaohs. If you wanted to start with Predynastic Egypt, you can go ahead and ADD ONE THOUSAND YEARS to all of those dates
I hate that this is still getting notes but that it’s getting notes *without the timeline addition* like c’mon, man. I had to do MATHS for this. I DID MATHS FOR YOU PEOPLE AND ALL I GOT WAS A BUNCH OF RACISTS
the legality of parodies is so funny. if you take a bit from someones work without their permission its illegal UNLESS you make fun of them
Mockery is so central to human culture that the right to it is enshrined in law. Aliens have written many volumes on this. Which humans have duly parodied.
Who wants to see a FAT otter. A real ROUND boy. A HUGE man. A CHUNKY guy.
This is so much fucking funnier with the gif removed
sail boats are the easiest thing to steal ever because they don’t have a key because there is no engine. all you need is a sound knowledge of the wind and a yearning to conquer the seas
You’re healing every time you
Dogs on TV always look so stiff. Like they’re supposed to be just sitting there but you can tell that the dog is like “!!!! Am good boy!!! Am hold position!!! Am look off stage at handler!!! Hi handler!!! Ready your finest treats for the good boy!!!”
My favorite are dogs who are supposed to be fierce but are so clearly playing at it. Just dubbing in growls can’t change that butt-wiggle of “I’m doing THE THING and soon I’ll get PRAISE and play with MY TOY”
Yes. This too.
In the Lion the Witch and the Wardobe movie (the one with Tilda Swinton, not the BBC one) the wolves all have CGI tails. Because they’re actually Malamute or Huskie crosses and wouldn’t stop wagging their goddamn tails all the time because they were so excited to be playing with all these nice people on this nice set with their nice handlers just out of shot holding lots of nice sausage.
jesus christ this is seamless
this is fucking witchcraft if I didn’t remember the original scene it would be IMPOSSIBLE to tell me this is fake
This is edited ???
Why are we acting like this is more shocking than the original
If you’re a lesbian and someone asks “have you ever been with a man” they’re about to try to convince you that you’re not gay
If you’re a bi woman and someone asks you if you’ve ever been with a woman, they’re about to try to convince you that you’re not bi
No one believes wlw about our own identities, and dating history questions are almost always loaded questions
# I C O N I C
This honestly looks like a post from those “Incorrect avenger quotes” blogs that are floating around but it’s real and thats amazing
