Imogen really did the whole relationship thing in reverse didn't she?

In that order

bocchi the rock Who doesn't' ship them?

the issue with the dishes and getting rid of leftovers in the fridge and so on is that Well you dont want to do it because it sucks and is gross. so you can avoid it for a while. but watch out! because now its worse

starting a collection

repurposing my dragonborn dnd character so I can become a furry

look at her 🔫 fursona

no one is talking about her rock bra

I love the rock bra/breast forms! I'm not sure if this is the intention but I love the worldbuilding idea of dragonborn women, trans or cis, being dysphoric about a lack of mammalian tits because of mammalian-dominant culture or something. Or maybe they as a culture are perfectly fine going bare-chested but after all this time breast form carving is an honored tradition so they start getting funky and intricate with it without trying to perfectly replicate flesh. Maybe it's become un-gendered and the apparent presence of tits has absolutely nothing to do with the gender of the dragonborn.

Not sure if this random riffing off the image is in any way accurate to the worldbuilding of the campaign she comes from but I will be stealing it for the next campaign I DM.

It is part of the worldbuilding, in-campaign it’s the hip new fashion for dragons & 100% gender neutral 👍 it’s mostly seen as like a weightlifting thing more than anything else which is very fun

casts a little spell that materializes a blunt on the hand of every affected creature in a large aoe

my instagram explore page loves showing me those like erotic dark romance novel tiktoks and i really have to wonder: why do all these straight women desperately want to fuck a mafia boss

Okay, let's try and break this down.

Sexual fantasies are, by their very nature, transgressive. Yes, even the fluffy, romantic ones. As long as general culture remains negative about sex and sexuality in any form that isn't cishet procreative sex within the confines of matrimony with the woman not as an equal actor but an object sex is performed onto, this is going to remain true.

And the thing about fantasies is that our brains like to take the things we crave the most and mix them up with our fears, anxieties, pain, and trauma into a melange of, sometimes, truly epic levels of fuckery.

But here's the secret - things we fantasize about, from the most wholesome to the bizarre to seriously fucked up? They are very, very often NOT what we literally want.

Being into dubcon or noncon doesn't mean you actually want to be raped or rape. Being into monsters doesn't make you a zoophile. And fantasizing about violent, obsessive men doesn't mean you wouldn't run as far the fuck away from a man like that the second one of them set their sights on you.

If you're really interested in the subject, I recommend reading My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday, a compilation of anonymously submitted women's sexual fantasies. And, as it turns out, women fantasize about a lot of really violent, uncomfortable, and just plain screwed up stuff.

And, for most of them, even when they don't actively realize it, it's about reclamation. Of fear, of trauma, of loss of power. It's about THEMSELVES and how THEY feel. As weird as it's gonna sound, the men featured in those fantasies don't really matter, they're just a vessel, a manifestation of the extreme version of what you're dealing with and/or crave. A safe, cathartic way to experience something profoundly unsafe, unwise, and terrifying.

For women fantasizing about criminals, villains, monsters, and anti-heroes, it's very often about the idea that someone like that - intense, violent, with single-minded focus, and immense power - would love her, want her, always put her first, go against all his instincts/training for you without a second thought and be a clear and present danger to everyone but warmth and safety for her and only her, and burn the world itself down for hurting her in even the slightest of ways. It's a sexual version of the fantasy of having a pet tiger, one that would never, ever attack you or hurt you in any way.

And just like the people who want to boop the forbidden snoot, the women fantasizing about their fantasy Mafia Boss Lover are very well aware of the fact that 1) men like that don't actually exist, 2) the criminal world of their fantasy has all but nothing to do with reality, and 3) that the thing they're actually fantasizing about is being loved, wanted, and safe... just in a REALLY intense, exaggerated way. And, let's not mince words, there's also often a more or less strong D/s dynamics at play in the scenario, too.

Now, you can choose to be judgy bitches about it (goodness knows plenty of you in the replies, comments, and tags are), in which case I would suggest you examine why you're feeling such a profound need to shame women for enjoying themselves in their own little world, or you can apply the YKINMKATO mantra and understand that straight women, living in the constant state of preyhood, sometimes consciously or subconsciously reclaim power over that situation through transgressive sexual fantasies.

Also, fuck this idea that queer people only fantasize about healthy and wholesome relationships, romantic, sexual, or otherwise, as if at least half of Tumblr isn't simping for, oh, for example, Hannibal fucking Lecter. Do you have ANY idea how many Mafia and Thug BL content there is out there?! FFS, Tom of Finland, a WWII veteran who fought against Nazis, drew art of exaggeratedly masculine men in Nazi uniforms in pornographic situations as a way to dissociate himself from those traumas and fascists themselves as far back as the 1950s!

So yeah. Less judgement, and more taking some responsibility for curating your online experience if seeing someone's kink truly offends you this much.

"Booping the forbidden snoot" is a good way of putting it

prev tags, text ver. below the cut

I'm going to try to explain this without sounding completely deranged but like, okay: IMO, there are two kinds of fantasies. let's call them horses and unicorns.

a horse fantasy is something that is theoretically possible. I do not currently own a horse, and the reality of owning a horse would involve boring stuff like paying for its food and mucking out its stall, but it is something I could do in real life. like, horses exist and can be owned by humans. lots of fantasies can fall into this category: traveling to a foreign country, living in a cute house with just you and a cat, winning a marathon, basically anything that is technically achievable even if it would be difficult to do so in real life.

a unicorn fantasy is something that is definitely (or almost definitely) impossible. I do not currently own a unicorn, and there is no version of reality where I could own a unicorn, because unicorns are not real. the actual logistical issues that might arise from owning a unicorn, like paying for its food or mucking out its stall, are completely immaterial because it's not something that could ever actually happen. and like, it's in my brain! I control it! I can imagine a unicorn that only eats marshmallows and shits potpourri if I want to!

I think the disconnect comes in when people assume that a unicorn fantasy is actually a horse fantasy. to use the tiger example from upthread: you can own a tiger. you can't have a completely domesticated tiger that would never hurt you, not even by accident. so saying "I want a pet tiger" is a unicorn fantasy, because everything necessary for that fantasy to work (it being completely domesticated and incapable of harming you) are not things you can have in real life.

now, serial killers/war criminals/normal criminals/etc. are all things that exist. and there are definitely people in relationships with them in real life! so it's tempting to assume that something like "I want to fuck a serial killer" is a horse fantasy: something you would want to do, and could do, if given the opportunity.

but for the vast majority of people, that's not the fantasy. the rest of the fantasy ("he's a serial killer, BUT he only kills bad people and he's nice to me and is both able and willing to protect me from literally anything and has sex exactly the way I want to because he magically knows what I want because, again, this is happening in my brain") is what makes it a unicorn.

...huh. My thanks to @bemusedlybespectacled​ for putting NAMES to those things, “horse fantasy” and “unicorn fantasy”; because I’ve come across those concepts before, but never with WORDS for them. I hope that those terms become commonly understood, so then people can have discussions about them without having to spend an hour ahead of time just making sure that everyone’s talking about the same thing.

Your father use to roleplay as a tape worm for my pleqsure

hope he did a good job at least. Didn't embarrass the whole family.

He strutted his shit kinda

Nyx - 2022 Engineer, Heavy-loader platform Human, arachne Lower-back/Hip reconstruction Wastes

what if there was a woman who attacked you with an axe

parry

wuh oh she went for the grapple. and now uh. oh gosh i should give you two some privacy

Zombie now

Yuri zombie tho

Yuri Zombie now

petition to change the ending of totk so kohga flies in at the end on one of his contraptions and does an 'undefined magic beam blast™️' to undragonfy ganondorf and when asked how he just shrugs and says "power of love idk"

(everytime i think about how that part with zelda was handled i just get mad bc its just so dumb and robs the whole game of so much and there was so much you could have done with this but no lets use the dumbest way possible it literally feels like one of those rushed endings of a series that got unexpectedly canceled)

the easiest fix imo: impa, maybe even with minerus help bc idk let her interact with anyone but link?? at all?? hello??, finds out about secret forbidden mcguffing, go you and search for secret forbidden mcguffin (reason to infiltrate yiga? extra dungeon opportunity?) you find an keep it and you activate it after the end battle and it retreives the enigma stone out of her or sth, so you can actually walk into the end KNOWING you have something to help zelda (impa can tell you its best to use it when you are done with everything so you dont get confused about wanting to use it right away) and feel like you actually did something to help her (i also feel it would have more impact if the gone gone ghosts are actually gone gone and dont reappear in naked dimension tm again to cast magic tm beam blast despite going poof and never appearing anywhere else until then)

i absolutely hate that you walk into the end like you just .. dont care, like if you kept zelda a dragon that would be cool and daring, actually have her sacrificing her soul you know, be a sacrifice, and if you want her to return then well LEMME DO SOMETHING instead of just walking into it like you dont care and then watch it solve itself

(also let zelda have lasting effects from it and take AWAY LINKS ARM IT WAS EATEN BY MIASMA LET IT STAY GONE THATS SUCH A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY TO GIVE LINK A SHIEKAH PROSTHETIC OR SOMETHING OOOOH MY GOD AT LEAST MAKE IT SCARRED LIKE AAAAAAH)

my dnd party has run into an npc who may or may not be evil and may or may not decide to betray us and the dm was in chat today like “just so everyone knows…not addressing this comment at anyone in particular…his favorite colors are red and black…wink” so now i’m desperately trying to get a real physical friendship bracelet done before session tomorrow in the vain hope that i can somehow stop this npc from trying to do a murder on my party

UPDATE: the npc was in fact a shapechanged adult black dragon with violence and conquest in his heart. however he did let merry put a friendship bracelet on him and then when she was like “hm okay how big is your wrist in dragon form” he was like “you wanna see?” and then turned into a dragon and let merry measure him for a second, dragon-sized friendship bracelet. the dm described him afterwards as being deeply confused as to why he did this or let any of this happen to him. call that the merry effect

this guy is now a recurring npc because merry was SO determined to make him her friend that it actually somehow worked. he cast dream to talk to one of my party members like “hey…how’s it going…how are the tieflings in the party…not that i care…also i’m not lonely. bye” and the player was like “is he still wearing merry’s friendship bracelet in this dream” and the dm was like “yeah…”

fsdfjhskdf the dm just sent us all this image

so merry taught naeric (the dragon) the power of love, obviously, and because his heart was open and beautiful he started dating…a SECOND evil dragon. and then that gf betrayed him and cast ninth level imprisonment on him so now naeric is our damsel in distress and we have to save him from his girlfriend, the actual villain. how the turntables…

and. in the most horrible plot twist of all. the gf stole his friendship bracelet.

NO MERCY ON THAT HARLOT! MURK HER!

Head from the alcoholic Bocchi the Rock bassist would be terrible, painful, and you would probably need to go to the hospital afterwards, but I think it might still be worth it

wallace gromited so that chicken run. is this something

well you can’t say i didn’t try ❤️

i’m in spain rn and i said wallace gromited so that chicken run to my friend on the bus and the woman in front of us looked back at us then pulled out english duolingo