my mom loves plants so i’m convinced that i was a little bean that she planted and i just sprouted into a human bean

bye peter

a venn diagram of the things george washington said not to do and the things america did would be a circle

why does this rare duck pepe look like macaulay culkin

bird: [screaming loudly into cup]

Current mood: This birb

Birb for president

LOOK AT ALL OF THE EDIBLE FINGER HATS truheezy

YASSS

can a dinosaur even get more fuckin rad?

you bet jurassican

i am so impressed by that dinosaur and that pun congratulations

If you put a picture of yourself in a locket

You could say you are… Independant

I am ashamed at 20 seconds I took to understand the pun

You’re safe.

There’s nothing chasing you. There won’t be a face in the window. Nothing is following you up the stairs. Nothing is under your bed. You can throw your legs over your bed, you can have your arm over the side of the bed, because nothing is out to get you. I promise. I’m here to protect you. I’ll kick its ass.

You’re safe.

“Whoa. Intense.”

ULTIMATE "OH FUCK I JUST GOT MY FIRST APARTMENT AND ALL I HAVE IS ONE CHANGE OF CLOTHES AND A THIRD SOCK" CHECKLIST

CLEANING

KITCHENWARE

LIVINGROOM

BEDROOM

DININGROOM

BATHROOM

MISCELLANEOUS

FOOD STUFF

Don't kill yourself, please.

If you’re suffering from depression and are looking for a sign to not go through with ending your life, this is it. This is the sign. We care.

If you see this on your dash, reblog it. You could save a life.

You just saved mine.

when your kindness gets mistaken for flirting.😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊