help me bowl o’ rice help me bowl o’ rice help me down those stairs

i saw this on twitter and DIED cause of their faces i love black people

lady in the pink LMAOOO

We need more women like this

My reblog was pretty aggressive on this one

im going to p

ractice my cooking.  i need to be able to cook 10000 eggs in 10 minutes.  that’s 1000 eggs a minute.  that’s 16.666666 eggs a second.  i need to be fast.  so fast you cant even see my arms as they frantically prepare egg after egg.  i hope the world is ready

WHAT THE UFCK

mondays more like

which country has the most birds

portugeese

wait

thats a language

portugull

nice recovery

don’t you mean nice redovery

turkey, how did we miss turkey

snorting coke

was it really worth it

something we thought we’d never see

reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.

THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.

The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.

AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.

THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.

YOOOOOOO

I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS

LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL

IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

THE BOY I FELL I LOVE WITH LEFT TO TRAVEL THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD AND HAS BEEN GONE NOW FOR 3 MONTHS. WE HAVENT SPOKEN SINCE BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT TO MAKE HIM FEEL TRAPPED TO ME AND NOT ENJOY HIS TIME SO I WAITED FOR HIM TO CONTACT ME FIRST. I SAW THIS ON A PARTICULARLY LOW DAY WHEN I WAS MISSING HIM SO MUCH I CRIED FROM THE PAIN, GUYS I REALLY LOVE HIM, SO I THOUGHT MEH WHAT THE FUCK, AND WISHED HE WOULD JUST LET ME KNOW HE WAS OKAY.

GUYS.

HE FUCKING CALLED ME 20 MINUTES LATER

20 FUCKNG. MINUTES. LATER.

GOOD THINGS DO HAPPEN. AND ITS IN THIS POST.

I wish for someone to leave something in my ask.

OKAY SO I ASKED FOR A HEDGEHOG AND NOW GUESS WHO HAS A PET HEDGEHOG

I WISHED FOR SNK MERCH THE FIRST TIME. I GOT A JACKET.

I WISHED FOR MY GIRLFRIEND THE SECOND TIME. I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND.

I wish for 1989 tickets to an L.A. show appear for me.

CAN I PLEASE GET A CHANCE TO HUG LUKE?

I wish to get the job I’m applying for tomorrow

I wish for troye to follow me back on twitter and for my crush to like me back

how to look like u werent just crying in the bathroom

hold a cold rag/tissue to your eyes and anywhere else that tends to get red or blotchy for two minutes

regulate your breathing so your blood flow evens out

fix your makeup and make sure you’re not sweaty

go back out and live a lie

REBLOG TO FUCKING SAFE A LIFE OH MY GOD

I’m never eating Oreos again 😢😭

Keep in mind that the average person can burn 70 calories just by:

Food is what fuels us and allows us to exist throughout the day: Without those 70 calories, simple daily activities like this wouldn’t even be possible. So to believe that those calories need to instantly and inherently be exercised away is harmful and downright untrue. 

–> Exercise is not a punishment for eating food.

–> Calories do not instantly need to be negated by exercise.

Your body is going to continue burning calories and using up energy whether or not you do a thousand jumping jacks. Trying to “balance” out your caloric intake like this will doubtless lead to an abusive and unhealthy relationship with food. Please don’t think of calories as something bad or guilty - You need them. They’re here to help your body and support your activity, not serve as a shameful source of fitness motivation. 

“ Exercise is not a punishment for eating food.”

It definitely feels like punishment or is taught like it is.

That’s why i say forget watching my diet… And i only do physical activities enjoy. Being active at all is better than not at all. I’ve seen much better result this way and I’m not getting burnt out at the gym as quickly.

I’ll just leave you guys with this.

I’m so not sorry