living in the countryside really strikes the fear of god into you at the most random moments. you’ll just make eye contact with a cow or stare for too long into a brook and all of a sudden you’ll think something like “these are old bones and i am merely a passing occupant” and then you have to go and put the kettle on to cope

me:

the hare staring at me from across the field: which one of your lives is this?

me, legging it: okay tea time i think

Ahh, it’s back

i have disproportionately strong feelings about this.

every time i say “nah i’m not gonna watch it again.” BUT I STILL DO EVERY TIME.

YEAUGH

@dissonancies

watch this video and then try to tell me there is a god

The best part is when he turns the minion to face the camera & for a moment you think the minion is talking

how is this not intentional comedy

kermit really is that bitch…… he went from crying in showers and talking to negative inner monologues to running freely in a dandelion field,,…i’m tryna be on this level

reblog happy kermit for a full month of good luck 

a full ever after of good luck

Whats up with Hei Hei in some of the Moana promo art and posters? Like

And like 

And even???? 

He’s so angry and ready to Throw Down 

But then in actuality he’s just 

Disney explain

I went to the “Behind the Scenes” panel for Moana at CTN expo this year and the explanation is as follows:

In development, HeiHei used to be a character meant to be Moana’s watchdog. He stands to the side making sure she stays out of trouble (and away from the sea) and judges her (sort of like Flint the hummingbird from Pocahontas) but the directors were worried that it made him too unlikeable. John Lasseter gave the crew about 48 hours to think of a way to figure out how to save his character or else he’d be cut from the film. So instead HeiHei’s IQ was lowered waaaay down, making him more lovable and funny. During a story pitch in which Moana had to retrieve the Heart of Te Fiti from the Kakamora, she originally only retrieved the stone. The artists reboarded it exactly the same except HeiHei swallowed it and the Kakamora was lugging around a chicken instead and it instantly made everything more hilarious. To which Lasseter exclaimed at that moment: “THE CHICKEN LIVES!” an inside joke that was kept at the end of the film when the ocean spat HeiHei onto the shore and Maui remarks “the chicken lives!”  

best thing about this movie was the perfectly marketed/polished commercial animal side kick just waiting to be the new olaf and then its in the movie for like 3 mins tops and instead a chicken that eats rocks gets to be the disney animal companion™

IT GETS BETTER.

Once they rewrote the character they were in a panic. Who could voice such a role?

None other than Alan Tudyk, known as “Walt Disney Studios’ lucky charm” due to his roles as Duke in Frozen, King Candy in Wreck-It Ralph and KTSO in Rogue One, who made the front freaking page of the Wall Street Journal due to his performance.

Tudyk says: “The character you’re playing, even though he’s a rooster and is really stupid, you approach it in the same way you would approach Hamlet, which is exactly how I approached it. But they give you the circumstances. “You’re on the boat. You didn’t expect to be here. You just climbed in a boat to maybe sleep. You don’t even know why you climbed in the boat. You’re really that dumb. Every three minutes is a new world to you, so you see that you’re trapped on this boat, and you freak out. Go.” 

Note: Tudyk went to Julliard.

Also: Alan Tudyk is the only non-Pasifika/Maori person in the voice cast. He plays the chicken.

bless Scottish twitter

ya fuckin space slice

This is the best Tumblr mobile glitch I’ve personally encountered in a long time

There’s a spell to small your dick but not to unsmall it???

What do you think this is? Marvel? Actions have consequences

look at this

for anyone interested these are paso fino horses and this gait is natural! they are the smoothest ride with no bumpy movements. you could practically drink juice and not once would it spill on your face!

these bears need to chill theytre stressin me up

The Fab Five travel through time, space, and genre to help Professor Flitwick get his groove back

i’m crying this is so good omg

This is the best thing i’ve ever seen

(Chanting) ancient cheese with a deadly disease ancient cheese with a deadly disease ancient c

CAN WE STILL EAT THE FUCKING BOG BUTTER?

Fellas we’ve got ourselves 2 outta 3 ingredience for a legendary Grilled Cheese

Grilled cheese!!!!

HELL YEA BAYBEE WE DONE IT !! GOD HERSELF GONNA GRILL US A CHEESE

Tonight we dine like kings

Inflation is honestly the strangest shit. Like someone rn is thinking of getting blown up like a balloon and they’ve got a boner.

i thought this was about economics at first and that second sentence hit me like a freight train

im gonna throw up from laughing thinking about this tweet

bork megapost

just me, her, (the aliens) and the moon

“So why r we here? U may say…ur mom brought u into this world. But do u ever think, god brought me into this world?”

if u you can turn to Isaiah 4:10—its my favourite verse in the bible tbh—we’ll read it over. Who would like to read?

Exactly, Johnathon!! Do not fear! I am with you! Do not be dismayed, for I am your god! Such a beautiful verse. Praise Jesus am I right?

Michael: yo I don’t even know why I’m here like fuck religion. this shit is bogus

Pastor Niall in the middle of preaching:

Proof That Baby Showers Are the Literal Worst (x)