monday afternoon baby we gettin it!!!!!

if you warch all this you get to belive

This is it. This is the funniest thing I have ever seen.

— Men at Arms, Terry Pratchett

not gonna become a repost account but i think about “4” “dumb fuck” every day

i was this close to turning off reblogs but someone here actually gets it

Like for Jowling Kowling Rowling to be eaten by orcas. Reblog for Jowlong Kowling Rowling to also be eaten by orcas

Pensions sound so fake as a zillennial. You work for one place for decades (already sounds fake) and then afterwards you leave and they just. keep paying you. the same amount of money. to do nothing. for the rest of your life. if i wasn't already aware that this was something that readily and commonly existed during my grandparent's days then it would sound like some kind of socialist pipe dream

American pensions sound incredibly fake as an Australian, you just expect your fucking employer to put aside and manage your superannuation all by themselves and it's with them until the second they pay it out to you? It sounds like someone scamming you out of your own retirement money.

good news! they do scam you. like all the time.

Australian super funds were scamming people by charging too many fees so we started a royal fucking commission about it and it completely changed the industry.

our banks and corporations got together and explained very nicely to the government that they want to keep all of our money for any reason they can make up and our government said ‘sure’

TIL Dr. Sigmund Freud was addicted to smoking and failed to quit for good throughout a 45 years long battle that included 33 operations for cancer of the jaw, an artificial jaw replacement, and attacks of “tobacco angina” exacerbated by nicotine . He was known to smoke up to twenty cigars a day.

via reddit.com

Jesus ffucking christ bro.

Seems like he had an oral fixation… Almost as if he were replacing the cigarette with… No i shant say…

Then we’ll all say it together

F

O

R

F

R

O

D

O

I'm very fond of this video

Fun fact about you, the person reading this:

You just lost the game

The dead don’t die. No one is ever really gone. Etc.

Techromancy

Horrors within my comprehension

Fucking grave robbers

Those are not the living dead I singed up for as a zombie fan.

I’m all for progress, but necromancy is not someþing we need replaced. Let þe dead stay dead, if þey wish to live þey’ll let you know.

Every time Sean Astin makes a statement on whether or not Sam and Frodo were indeed gay for each other in lord of the rings he’s always like “well we have to acknowledge that attitudes around sexuality have changed dramatically over the past several decades and since authorial intent is only up to speculation, the story is open to multiple readings, some of which might have different significances for different groups of people also they kiss on the lips because I said so”

at the rose city comic con panel this month a fan asked them (sean and elijah) if sam and frodo were in love and they said

Sean: .....yes. absolutely

Elijah: 100 percent.

Sean: dont tell rosie

Rosie: "This is my husband Sam, and that's his husband, Frodo. Frodo is my husband-in-law. I'm not into him, he's he's a bit too 'elfy' for my taste, but Sam likes him, and that's fine with me. As far as I know, Frodo can't give Sam children, but Frodo looks after ours all the same, so I don't mind sharing Sam if it means another pair of eyes on the wee ones. In all honesty, our family tree is right simple compared to some hobbits. Yes, I'm referrin' to you Lobelia, over there pretendin' you ain't eavesdroppin'. Still bitter you ain't got either of my boys or their house, eh?"

On the topic of English people being shitheads towards Welsh people - This fucking dude today on AITA

Yeah pretty sure we're all hoping for a divorce on this one lol

how did this fucker say it's "not as bad as it sounds" and then somehow end up being even worse than it sounds by the fourth sentence

Further updates, I couldn't resist looking this one up.

Character development.

It’s called copula deletion, or zero copula. Many languages and dialects, including Ancient Greek and Russian, delete the copula (the verb to be) when the context is obvious.

So an utterance like “you a bitch” in AAVE is not an example of a misused you, but an example of a sentence that deletes the copular verb (are), which is a perfectly valid thing to do in that dialect, just as deleting an /r/ after a vowel is a perfectly valid thing to do in an upper-class British dialect.

What’s more, it’s been shown that copula deletion occurs in AAVE exactly in those contexts where copula contraction occurs in so-called “Standard American English.” That is, the basic sentence “You are great” can become “You’re great” in SAE and “You great” in AAVE, but “I know who you are” cannot become “I know who you’re” in SAE, and according to reports, neither can you get “I know who you” in AAVE.

In other words, AAVE is a set of grammatical rules just as complex and systematic as SAE, and the widespread belief that it is not is nothing more than yet another manifestation of deeply internalized racism.

This is the most intellectual drag I’ve ever read.

Reblog every time