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Toggle's Bloggle

@togglesbloggle / togglesbloggle.tumblr.com

Mors stupebit et natura, Cum resurget creatura

Hello! Here are some of my beliefs:

  1. Passionate curiosity and a commitment to truth make us more empathetic, more kind, and more fully human- not less.
  2. The words we share with one another are the most dangerous and deadly tools at our disposal; for this reason, open speech and free expression should be everyone's birthright, rather than hidden away in the vaults of a powerful few.
  3. The essence of community is in the mediation of conflict, not the suppression of dissent.
  4. Names are a system of control, albeit a good and important one; pseudonyms and masks are the necessary counterweight, and without them we cannot make the messy transition between who we are and who we are becoming.
  5. The sacred need not be sacrosanct.
  6. The questions we're most afraid of tend to provide the answers we most need.
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How Lutessa Found A King

I.

Fair Lutessa was not always the cradle of kings, and before its austere temples and marble effigies came to dominate the horizon, Lutessa was a village just like yours or mine. But the Wheel turns, and Lutessa’s idyll shattered as she grew. Her people came to bicker and fight more and more often amongst themselves, over even the smallest of things! Things such as: whether this man had sold his neighbor the right amount of flour, or whether the miller’s children had pushed the blacksmith’s children into the marshes, or whether the inn-keeper’s wife was allowed to dine with the tavern-keep. Since Lutessa had yet no magistrate or ruler to call her own, the townspeople, fresh from a brawl, clamored for adjudication at the doors of the Martyr-God’s prophet.

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Kinwa and the Engineer

The Matubon people of Slow-Lake have a strange custom, which is that they consider teaching taboo, and refuse to mark symbols, deal in numbers, and do all but the most passive apprenticeship; for the only true knowledge is that which was wrested from the lions of one’s mind - all else is lies and the whispers of wicked men.

“Poverty is that state and condition in society where the individual has no surplus labour in store, or, in other words, no property or means of subsistence but what is derived from the constant exercise of industry in the various occupations of life. Poverty is therefore a most necessary and indispensable ingredient in society, without which nations and communities could not exist in a state of civilization. It is the lot of man. It is the source of wealth, since without poverty, there could be no labour; there could be no riches, no refinement, no comfort, and no benefit to those who may be possessed of wealth.” – Patrick Colquhoun

I started reading some of Orwell’s nonfiction essays recently.  “The Spike” isn’t my favorite so far- that honor probably goes to “A Hanging”, although I’m still reading- but it got me doing a Wikipedia dive about British workhouses and that in turn gave me the quote.

It struck me mostly because it’s one of most direct and blunt ways I’ve seen this argument made in the first person.  That is, one often sees this point of view imputed to people that hold capital in the modern era, but it’s always shocking how explicit people could be about it during the early industrial revolution, around the era that gave Polanyi his “Great Transformation.”  Near as I can tell, this isn’t a weak-man argument; the belief in poverty as load-bearing was common enough to express itself in legal policy, and possibly even correct to boot.

The other thing I learned from the Wiki dive is that workhouses themselves (or at least, the system of legal obligations that would mature into them) date from a similar attempt to control and channel human skill at the expense of the skilled:

“The Poor Law Act of 1388 was an attempt to address the labour shortage caused by the Black Death, a devastating pandemic that killed about one-third of England’s population. The new law fixed wages and restricted the movement of labourers, as it was anticipated that if they were allowed to leave their parishes for higher-paid work elsewhere then wages would inevitably rise… The resulting laws against vagrancy were the origins of state-funded relief for the poor.  ”

That is, in response to growing wages, a law was created to keep skilled workers in their place both figuratively and literally.  Relief for poverty was a knock on; not strictly necessary, but if you won’t let people leave to find work, it’s probably smart to give them food at least.  The balance of power eventually swung back towards the nobility, but the workhouses themselves just persisted from century to century, reinventing themselves with new justifications well in to the 20th century.

A friend of mine grew up in a town with an old workhouse that had been recommissioned as an old folks’ home.  When she was a child, she’d run as she passed it- the shadow of the building was bad luck.

No thesis I think, but I want to write it down.  Catch some of these feelings in amber before I move on to Orwell’s other essays.

I do wonder if the connotations of the word poverty have changed, here? It seems to me that Colquhoun is not describing what we think of as poverty, but rather the state of not being a rentier. There is no contradiction between being upper-middle-class in terms of material possessions and lifestyle, and having no investment income and thus being ‘forced’ to work as Colquhoun outlines. But a software engineer who spends all his income is hardly poor, modern sense. (Not very smart, obviously, but that’s a separate issue.) Yet in Colquhoun’s sense he is indeed living in poverty, while being far wealthier than anyone alive in Colquhoun’s time!

And in this sense it does seem to me that the 'poverty is needed’ argument is stronger. You still cannot make absolutely everyone a rentier. (With present technology, that is.) There just aren’t enough resources for a livable UBI for everyone, even in the US. (Yet. Growth mindset, by all means.) You might be able to arrange things so everyone can retire on their investments after a certain age, but you’re still going to have someone doing the work that generates the real income those investments are a claim on.

Ran across this comment again after I think like two years? So this is not a reply so much as an opportunity to think out loud, and keep putting pressure on these ideas in my head and see how they shift. In particular, I think the big thing that changed since I wrote the OP and read this reply last time is that I started reading a lot more Henry George, so take that for what it's worth.

In any case, I think this comment is very on-point in that Colquhoun, above, is absolutely equating 'not being a rentier' with 'being impoverished'. Likely, I think, because he was only writing at the very beginning of the industrial revolution, and an educated/specialist middle class basically didn't exist in 1800. But I don't think you can say the connotations of 'poverty' have changed all that much; rather, what's changed is the idea that a laborer could achieve anything other than subsistence, with any real surplus just being extracted by rentiers and capitalists. (That is, by holders of capital, not in the ideological sense.) Remember that this is the same era in which Malthus lived and theorized!

'Labor' here, as an economic construct, means basically a pile of undifferentiated human flesh that can be flexibly used in the same way that we'd use programmable robots today- plonked in a factory line, given basic instructions, and told to repeat those instructions indefinitely. Capital, in this equation, was the store of value from which this pile of flesh is provided shelter and nutrition- and in fact, per Malthus, this flesh-pile will in fact grow to the capacity set by capital rather than build savings as an individual might. The construct was very 'ecological' in that way. Charitably, the Flynn effect hadn't happened yet, so I think it was probably at least marginally easier to think this way without being a cartoon villain.

The difference is, I suppose, one of the great unanticipated triumphs of industrialism- the discovery that humans at all economic strata are in fact persons, both educable and agentic, and that Malthus can in fact go right to hell.

There are a lot of structural forces now in play that genuinely act to preserve the 'non-subsistence labor' class, some enshrined in law and some encoded in the needs of the modern economy itself. At the same time, I think unskilled labor is still effectively in the same boat as it was in Colquhoun's day, and the legal and economic advantages enjoyed by skilled labor aren't strong enough to prevent Walmart shelvers and Amazon warehouse packagers from reverting over time to the most base level of subsistence possible within their host nation's welfare system and tech level.

This is, of course, where the Georgist nugget kicks in. For all that we may not have the level of ambient wealth needed to support our entire population comfortably on a living-wage UBI, it's undeniable that as a civilization we're orders of magnitude more wealthy than previous generations- and by the same token, it's equally undeniable that a shitty apartment in Portland or New York in 2023 demands a greater store of wealth from its tenants than Colquhoun himself ever laid claim to in his whole damn life. If our average rent today was "the amount of wealth commanded by a day laborer in 1800", it would be effectively free!

The value of (especially urban) land- not improvements or construction, mind, just the price of an empty lot- grew hand in hand with the wealth and technology we created throughout the industrial revolution, as did the value of other unmodified natural resources like water, precious metals, and even sunlight. And they seem very likely to continue doing so as we fiddle our way through the full symphony of human technological progress; the greater our arts, the more opportunities we'll see in the world around us. That created value genuinely is collective, as few other things are, and even if a UBI can't get all the way to a living wage (yet!), then distributing those gains widely would still go a really long way towards allowing unskilled workers to escape subsistence, or (as they prefer) to work far fewer hours in order to achieve it, even if they aren't educated specialists benefiting directly from employment in O-ring production networks. Monopolization of natural resources really does seem to be a huge contributor to subsistence poverty in technologically modern states.

In other words, my response to "you can't make everybody a rentier," is "sure you can! You can literally make 'everybody' the beneficiary on rents extracted from monopolies on basic natural resources, dividing them equally and impartially among the whole population. And frankly that seems like a great plan, even if it doesn't end the need for labor as such, because it does so much to alleviate the misery of poverty."

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The Trials of Arteama

When Arteama turned fourteen, she snuck out of the temple unsupervised (something that, she would later learn, was a necessary part of her ascension ritual). The streets of Vimvi were still waking, none of the usual bustle yet to be found. Arteama, wending her way through the near-empty alleys and boulevards, felt as if the morning sun was embracing her in a cloak of divine safety, within which nothing could harm her. Eventually, she would learn that the penalties meant nobody would dream of harming a novice of the Wandering Serai in the first place. But she knew none of that at the time, and was amazed at the impunity with which she wandered the city.

So I got the 'rona (sad!), but am back mostly on the upswing (yay!) and am in that incredible Flowers for Alegernon moment where I mostly don't have a fever any more but can still appreciate really bad tv and can watch it guilt-free while I heal up. Right now it's "The Imperfects" but I am Open To Suggestions.

The correct choice here ended up being reading the (first half of the) Antimemetics Division SCP fiction as reviewed by @brazenautomaton, and let me tell you, literal fever dreams about this subject are incredible. I'm not even mad, I spent all night having the kind of nightmares a person could wait years for.

So I got the 'rona (sad!), but am back mostly on the upswing (yay!) and am in that incredible Flowers for Alegernon moment where I mostly don't have a fever any more but can still appreciate really bad tv and can watch it guilt-free while I heal up. Right now it's "The Imperfects" but I am Open To Suggestions.

Free Will is a Value Statement

When I was a kid, we had a dog.  It didn’t go well.

This particular dog- one of several in my childhood, and the only time it went awry- loved us very much, and we loved him too.  But when it came to strangers, he was very aggressive, and very dangerous, and not fully under our control.  We’d have to lock him up when there were visitors to the house, and even then it was less ‘barking’ and more ‘baying of hounds’, and unlike some animals he didn’t suddenly turn nice when he was in the same room with them.  And he was large, much too large for this to be safe.  Things came to a head when my mom was taking him for a walk and he started threatening a small kid playing in their own yard, and she came back terrified that if he ever got out, somebody would be badly hurt.

I remember quite clearly the conversation where my parents told me we couldn’t keep him.  They’d made the unfortunate choice to feed me cookies at the same time, to make the bad news go down easier; the net result is that there’s a specific brand of cookies that, to this day, I still can’t eat.  They just turn to ashes in my mouth.

(The good news is that, against all odds, it seems the ‘farm upstate’ that they sent him to was actually real.  They literally saved the receipts, so that when I got old enough to realize what that kind of story usually meant, they could give me proof that they hadn’t lied.  He did live what I believe to be a happy life in what was, more or less, a wild animal sanctuary.  Not all dangerous animals are so lucky, but sometimes, they are.)

The reason to dredge this up is to notice how unthinkable it was for any of us to call him ‘evil.’  Even when he was straining at the leash as hard as he could snarling and growling at a three year old, he wasn’t evil.  ‘Dangerous’, yes.  ‘Violent’, certainly.  But not that, not ever.

And that’s how it works, right?  We recoil at using the E-word for pets, young children, anyone that’s enough weaker than we are.  Evil-as-an-adjective is for peers and superiors, things which present a genuine threat to us.  You can watch this change for the natural world in real time- us moderns watch nature documentaries about predators avidly, and not as horror films, but our received culture still has ancient fairy tales about the ‘big bad wolf’ that date from before our conquest of Earth’s ecosystems.  What a difference a little power makes!  What was once a real and imminent fear, and a central figure in the atlas of evil, has withered away to a narrative archetype with no material referent, while the wolves themselves become objects of admiration and wonder, or a focus of conservation efforts, in direct proportion to our own sense of security against them.

And maybe you’re not the sort of person who thinks about evil much at all, which is honestly a pretty good strategy most of the time.  It can often obstruct thinking more often than it clarifies.  But even if you don’t, I’ll bet you still think about ‘justice’ a fair bit- and that follows the same rules, for about the same reasons.  The punitive and remunerative kinds of justice, anyway.  Was it some kind of punishment, to have that part of my family broken away when I was a child?  Was my dog’s loss and confusion something he deserved?  Of course not.  It was just- disharmony, I suppose.  We couldn’t find a way to put the world right, and so we suffered instead.

And yet when we reach a certain level of direct personal injury or threat of injury, especially by human causes- political enemies, alien people, angry mobs- then, almost without fail, we find ourselves reaching for this idea of justice.  (And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?) Show me, anywhere in the world, where a person has in all sincerity called for justice- and I’ll show you someone who feels weak.

Now, I can point at sentences like ‘my dog was not evil,’ and it should be pretty clear that I’m making a value statement, rather than expressing mundane factual belief in the same mold as ‘grass is green.’  That is, I’m not disputing any mechanism of action, or trying to explain why events occurred as they did.  I’m not giving you information you could use to prevent this from happening to you too, much as I hope you can.  I’m telling you how I feel, about what I want, about who I am.  I’m telling you about my grief.

Loosely speaking, you can imagine beliefs falling along a spectrum.  Don’t take this typology too seriously, it’s just a useful distinction to make for present purposes.  The first extreme of our spectrum is just the observational set of beliefs- the ‘sky is blue, grass is green’ category.  These are especially good for making plans that work, since they model a system that we usually want to work with in some capacity.  If you don’t want to fall off a cliff, it helps to have a good map. The second type is imperatives or value statements, beliefs about how to direct our efforts.  ‘Murder is bad’ is a belief like any other, but instead of telling us how to accomplish a goal, it tells us what goals we ought to have and what ends we should work towards.  (Moral realists will think of this second category as being a subset of the first; that’s perfectly reasonable but orthogonal to my point.).  Both types of belief are absolutely necessary for acting in the world: the means and the end, if you like.  

Here’s where I reveal my thesis:  When, honestly, was the last time you used the concept of free will to make a plan?

“People have free will” sure feels like a factual belief, from the inside.  It’s a description of who we are, right?  Like saying we usually have two legs, like saying the Earth goes around the Sun?  Only… it isn’t doing any of the things I do with factual beliefs.  It doesn’t make predictions, it doesn’t expand my capacity to act on the world.  If anything, ‘free will’ as a concept has a weird twisty negative definition (often something like ‘nonrandom indeterminacy’) that resists analysis of the reductive kind we usually use for this sort of thing.  

And if we look at how it’s positioned in the grand constellations of human thought, it’s awkwardly conjoined with a lot of the other things I’ve been talking about here.  Good, evil, justice.  I use my belief in free will a lot when I’m talking about culpability or praiseworthiness, when I’m deciding what to act towards, when to cheer and when to boo.  

I use it when I’m feeling weak.

Or, less personally, think about where ‘free will’ crops up in our court system.  And it does, in more than a few guises.  For example, altered states that compromise our volition are taken into account, and might even qualify as fully mitigating circumstances that tell the court not to punish the transgression.  (“I was not negligent on that construction site, your honor, I’m a diabetic and I was having a blood sugar crash.”)  In other cases, such as in murder charges, malice aforethought or planning the crime carefully might upgrade the sentence to be more harsh, whereas a crime ‘of passion’ might net fewer years in prison. (First-degree versus second-degree murder.)  What all of these have in common, notably, is in assessments of culpability, relevant to the question of how strongly the community wants to punish or condemn the situation.  But when it comes to the presentation of evidence, the chain of material observations that we use to establish confidence in the story of ‘what happened’, we invoke ‘motive’ instead- that is, we ask what benefits, inducements, insults, or other circumstances might have led the defendant to commit the act.  “Your honor, the accused is ordained with free will and is capable of choice,” is, notably, not considered sufficient to establish motive- but “your honor, the defendant was listed in the victim’s will as a primary recipient, and they were seen to have a large argument two days before the murder,” very much is.  Interesting discrepancy, no?  When we ask whether we should condemn others or show mercy, we care deeply about the defendant’s capacity to exercise free choice.  But when we ask material questions about what happened, trying to get a clear picture of the world as it is, we instead ask where the defendant is positioned in a causal web of material and social circumstances.

It’s hard, really hard, to reliably tell when our beliefs are about facts, describing things other than ourselves, and when they’re doing something else, paying rent in other ways.  But I notice, when I was a little kid crying in the car, I never once asked whether any of this was my dog’s fault.  It’s not that I didn’t know whether he had free will or not; it’s that it didn’t occur to me to ask.  I asked if it was my fault, certainly.  I’m sure my parents did too.  But we never asked if it was his, whether he’d decided to be this way.  That’s just not what ‘free will’ as a concept was for.

So, am I saying there’s “no such thing as free will” in the sense that I’m saying humans are fully deterministic and mechanistic?  Nah, not really.  To reiterate: I’m not saying that I have any confidence whatsoever that humans are deterministic, mechanical agents.  I think there’s plenty of room for consciousness to complicate the story of causality in ways I can’t anticipate; there’s every chance that human brains aren’t just billiard balls bouncing around in a universe running on linear algebra or whatever.  But I don’t think that ‘free will’ as currently discussed is in any sense an alternative to that model, either.  What I’m trying to say is that ‘free will’ isn’t really a claim about what the world is like at all.

The opposite of a belief in free will isn’t ‘I assert humans are chemical robots governed by deterministic electrochemical reactions’.  Instead, the opposite is ‘I am not angry at you for hurting me.’  Free will is a value statement.

Remember that ‘rate my dog’ parody account, and the central joke was that all the dogs got scores of like 12/10 or whatever?  And the punchline to it all, when somebody tried to call them out on the uselessness of a rating system that always stayed maxed out: “They’re good dogs, Brent.”  If I were at a high enough perch- strong enough, wise enough, safe enough- then that same optimism, I think, is the only part of my need for justice that would survive.  True power doesn’t rank humans from best to worst, or spend time blaming us for outcomes that cause suffering to ourselves or to others.  It doesn’t need to.

Okie, here’s a slightly dangerous essay I’ve had rattling around for a while.  Dangerous because Discourse, which I usually avoid in this space, so I hope you’ll try not to reward it too much and provide weird incentives for me.  But it’s a pretty interesting little model, too handy to fully pass over in silence.

Expect mild gender-binary essentialism and heteronormativity for modeling purposes- invoking these things in an explanatory but not normative or ethical sense.

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(Hour of the Scribe)

“When the world was young and man and plant and beast still called each other equals, there was Speech, and speaking was Power, and every utterance was a violence upon the face of the land. Amid the seas of boiling rock and fields rampant with strangling fern came EREAKAIZA, whose visage was silence; and Ereakaiza gazed upon the land, where in their battles Lion and Stag cleft mountains in twain, and Ibex raised mighty Whale from geysers out of the deep. And Ereakaiza saw Millipede steal the legs from Slug and Snail, and watched Bat steal the wings from Emu. And Ereakaiza saw also that Wolf split Man from Man so that, enraptured by the beauty of his brother’s face and legs and breasts, Man would distract himself from the hunt and lay with his sprung-off kin; but instead, delight so possessed Man that he chased after Wolf to share with him these pleasures; and Wolf became Dog, who chased after Ox; and Ox became Cow, who chased after Horse.

“Then Ereakaiza, tiring of this chaos, came and choked the Word out of every creature, and all of them howled and mewled and squeaked and ululated in anger and dismay, but to no end: for Speech had gone out of them, and their word was no longer deed carven upon the earth. So the creatures learned to resolve their disputes with blows, and to this end grew claw and thorn and sting, while Man retreated to his delights and built yokes and vineyards and pleasure-domes. And Ereakaiza took pity upon Man, from whom Wolf had taken his hunter’s cunning, and allowed him to retain the most part of his Speech. And this is why people take such joy in creating figments and toying with words and colors; for we are as children playing with their parents’ tools, in the hopes that one day we may be allowed to wield them fully once more.

“Now Ereakaiza was content with the world, and wandered far afield to where the sands and the skies intertwine, in the place where neither Time nor Cause holds sway, and there made a dwelling, and listened as the earth and the wind and the sea wove together a song of primeval being. Ereakaiza slept there and sleeps still, dreaming of things long gone and things which we of the soil will not see come to pass. And all who come upon Ereakaiza’s form partake too of this slumber, for in this way they become party to blessed creation.”

- Kizun’s Tale from “Three Tales of Ukkabal”, Anonymous

Things I Wish I Could Tell My Grandmother

I often wish I could tell her about my partner.  My coming out as such would have been hard for her- I don’t think the declaration of my sexual identity would really do her much good.  Different generations and all that, she wouldn’t have understood.  But she’d really have liked my partner, as a person.  They’re both so polite, you know?  Exacting without being neurotic, proper.  She was raised in frankly astonishing privilege, trained from childhood to meet with senators and other such powerful men.  As a consequence she always knew how to do things just so, invariably careful to keep to whatever Byzantine rules governed a picnic differently from a formal dinner, or to recall the proper ways to appreciate the visual arts versus the performing.  There was a little mantra she had about the meaning of courtesy- “to do the nicest thing in the nicest way.”  She would have seen that in him too, I think, the same kindness.

I wish I could tell her about my career- NASA and Mars exploration and all that.  She’d have been delighted, I expect.  She never did tell us why she was willing to give up her old social caste, to marry down into a family that had to work for its supper.  But I can’t imagine it was an accident that she picked an engineer from a long line of engineers and science types.  The space program today still carries a lot of that specific flavor of optimism that was so common in the first part of the 20th century when she made her choice, the hope for the future that was all tangled up with bigger rockets and taller cities and lasers and the power of the atom.  So I wish I could show that off for her, talk about my own adventures and trials trying to carry that torch forward just a little bit more.

I wish I could tell her about the damn chocolate milk.  She’s always eating too much or too little- there’s just no real way for her to know whether she’s eaten on any given day, so her food intake is really all over the map.  Sneaking off for snacks at one moment, turning down dinner at the next.  And at a certain point, the brain just stops coordinating the limbic system properly; I don’t think her hunger signals are particularly trustworthy any more, though it’s hard to tell for sure.  Throw in the diabetes, and it’s probably the single biggest challenge for her health, if you don’t count falls and the usual perils for a woman that old.

I wish I could tell her that her husband is dead.  That her father is dead, that her brothers are dead.  That these men that she waits for aren’t coming, and will never come again.  I wish she could grieve their absence, and not just wait, and wait, and never heal from the pain of parting.  I wish I could tell her that her kids have long since gone on to build families and kids of their own, and that she’s already a part of so many new lives that are only just beginning.

Most of all, I wish I could tell her that love lasts longer than the memory of love.  That her love for others has long since escaped the narrow confines of her mind and made it out to the world, and remade the form of things around her.  That it’s disguised as children, as grandchildren, as a home.  That it multiplies out there endlessly until now, at the end of her life, almost everything that touches her is some secret face of her love, coming back to meet her.  Slippers that appear by her bed in the winter, and bags of birdseed hidden in the bushes outside her window, bringing clouds of birds to watch every day.  The hands that help her from her bed to the table every morning- a woman trembling with weakness and a fear of falling but always, always too polite to miss breakfast.

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One of the best stories humanity ever produced was a draft of a rewrite of the Epic of Gilgamesh written by a Ecuadorian poet in 1935. It was tossed into a fireplace by an angry boy and lost forever. Another of humanity’s best was told 65,000 years ago and was overheard by a small tribe of embarked Neanderthals boating down a river in what is now northern Georgia. A short woman at the bank scrubbed a wooden idol in the water and sang an ancient tale in an unknown language. These two are eclipsed by everything produced by two brothers at the coast of what is now Cameroon between 503 BC and 490 BC, which they shared with some family and friends, and were beloved by everyone except a sour uncle.

The best notebooks

My name is eightyonekilograms, and I’m a notebook-holic (hi eightyonekilograms!). For a long time I have been unable to walk out of a store without buying a notebook, if I see one that looks interesting. Oh God, I have so many notebooks.

The good news is after all this time and money, I have found the best ones. So I pass this wisdom along to you, in the hopes it will spare you my lengthy search.

If you write with pen: the Nanami Paper Seven Seas notebooks (blank, lined, or dot grid all available). They use the inimitable Tomoe River paper, which has a seemingly-impossible capacity to absorb ink without bleed-through considering how thin and insubstantial it is (it almost feels like that paper they print Bibles on, but is more durable and less translucent). Because the paper is so thin, you can fit way more pages— 240 sheets— than similar-sized notebooks. And the binding is incredible: it’s a lay-flat thread-binding that can get perfectly flat despite the large number of pages, so there’s no need to waste space in the center of the pages or move the notebook at weird angles.

If you write with pencil: Baron Fig vanguard notebooks, available in three sizes with blank, ruled, or dot grid. Despite their obnoxious hipster aesthetic, these guys make great notebooks. They decided on custom sizes that are slightly shorter and wider than the usual A4/A5/etc. which seems like a strange choice, but is really great when you start using them. I’ve found the paper is good but not great for pens—it’s a little too absorbent and so makes fountain pens go a bit scratchy— but it’s perfect for pencil. They also make nice hardcover notebooks, but IMO they’re a bit too expensive for what you get.

I got a Seven Seas notebook on the strength of this recommendation, and it's really nice. I'm very glad I took it!

A few years back I started paying a lot more attention to quality in interfaces between me and my tools- instead of caring just about computer specs, also caring about keyboards. Spending a little extra on chairs I use often, or beds, or really anything that I'll spend a lot of time in physical contact with. Not aesthetics as such, but rather comfort and reliability, and arguably it's been one of the single best things I've done for my day-to-day happiness. Notebooks are in this category for me because they're where I spend a lot of my time, so it's a real pleasure to find a good way to up my game in that domain.