its Ya Boi

you only get this achievement if you were here and posting the entire time

Looking back i do realize being raised by the internet wasn't the best for my psychological well-being

same, gas-station-dick-pill

one struggle, penisdestroyer7766 🤝

Tumblr users have the same energy as Gotham citizens who refuse to move away after the fifth supervillain attack in a week.

At some point, staying becomes a weird badge of pride.

show me the roundest cat

one of my favorite human quirks is when the power goes out and you’re w other ppl and inevitably someone says ‘did the power go out?’ like…you’re all sitting there in the dead dark, tv black, wifi gone, lights OUT but still they’re like ‘hm. well I have a theory but it needs to be submitted for peer-review’

Me, sitting in my dark room after everything short-circuited: Hm. I can’t be certain, but I don’t think this is how it was a moment ago

i am God’s favourite little cosmic joke. his favourite suffering soldier. his sacrificial lamb. his poor little meow meow. his whore of babylon. i’m his fallen angel. i’m gonna bite his neck until it bleeds

why do ppl treat random folks on tumblr like they’re street performers working for tips?? y’all be up in ppl’s inboxes like “hi do u think u can stop posting about xyz?? it’s getting really annoying :(“ ummm u do realize that i am just some stranger on the internet posting random shit im thinking about n not some kind of entertainer right…?

girl what

Look guys, it's not that hard.

Tumblr???

they put girls in minecraft

like they put hot and sexy girls in minecraft

if you go in the water in minecraft there's hot and sexy girls splashing and giggling and if you get close they instantly kill you and steve screams like a real human man and there's realistic blood and the girls keep splashing but with steves blood

whatever you do don't look up pokemon number 591

haha okay i wonder how bad could it b-

Yes I reanimated your corpse to ask- Freud please shut up I just need to- yes we went to space thats not important. Do you know what a MILF is

Literally the best part of Breaking Dawn is Renesmee getting sad that she doesn’t sparkle like the others, and Bella saying “You’re the prettiest” followed immediately by Edward saying “I have to disagree” right in front of her

Like I get Edward can’t turn off the Bella Compliment Machine but imagine being self conscious about your looks and your mom is like “oh honey I think you’re the best looking one here.” And then your dad walks in like “What? No she’s not.”

this is so fucking funny bruh I’m physically crying bc I forgot smeyer needed her self-insert to be so not-like-other-girls that not even her kid could be complimented more highly than her by her own damn parents sjsjggzksndhxkdjdbshsissks

World’s Best Father right here 

Ok but now that I’m re-reading the text....

Why does it come across like Edward means

No, you bland looking child. It is I who is the prettiest.

me on here