Avatar

Fire Breathing Bitch - Queen

@tis-niki

never tickle a sleeping dragon • 20• minors dni

To Build a Home

deatheater!seungcheol x gryffindorprincess!reader
warnings: this is a brutal chapter. there will be fighting, and curses, and blood and a lot… of rage and unchecked craziness. there are two incredibly tortured souls in this chapter, so this will hurt. this will not be an easy chapter to read. this is also my first action scene ever, so i hope i was able to write it the way i pictured it in my head! as my amazing beta @minigum​ said, “ jesus i mean this in the best way possible but that was hard to read” i love you hahaha length: 3.9k

One | Two | Three | Four | coming soon…

Chapter Four

//

He was your first kiss.

It happened in fourth year. 

He mumbled over his words, and his face was burning red when he pulled away, but you thought he was the cutest boy you’ve ever laid eyes on.

He even apologized after the kiss was over, and all you could do was laugh because of course he would. 

Awkward and clumsy, he kept muttering things to himself. 

But it was your first time too, you reassured him. You were positive that your kissing was atrocious.

You didn’t know what to do with your lips. Keep them closed? Keep them open? What are you even supposed to do with your tongue?

But even through his stuttering, he insisted that you weren’t a bad kisser. 

He looked you straight in the eyes, growing redder by the second, and whispered how amazing you were.

But of course he would say that. He was always so sweet. 

Sweet, precious Seokmin.

He was your first kiss.

pac: How Would Your F/S Describe You? ⚙︎

these past couple of weeks have been hectic!! i've finally started to dwindle down on readings and i've completed a majority of them already (which i am so happy about, thank you so much for the support!) 💞 with that being said i am open to getting more readings again!! so ready to receive new orders and read for new people 💞 and i also wanted to quickly come forward to reassure you all that i haven't disappeared and that i'm still hereee doing pac/readings for you all. so yeah, book with me if you can! and now for the topic of today, i want to talk about how your f/s will perceive you and how they would describe you if they could. this can also be done with a special person in mind, the choice is yours! with that having been said, let's get started!

we have four piles; intuitively choose the one you're most drawn to. let your heart guide you, not your eyes.

Pile I. catwoman rolling in money

[8oC, 9oW, the hanged man, the chariot, KNoS, 9oS]

damn pile one 😭 you guys are really going through it and your person can see it loud and clear. i believe that your person won't have the best thoughts about you at the start. they believe that you're someone who runs away when the going gets too tough. i believe there could even be a point where they kind of test you and you fail? like they don't trust you anymore. they feel like you're too guarded. i get the image of you both in an almost grey interview where you both are being asked questions and they're taking their time to answer because they don't want to hurt your feelings but still want to be honest. the mood feels somber. almost like a fight/argument has just happened between you both. your person thinks that because of your unwillingness to disclose more of yourself you are unintentionally hurting and betraying them too. i hear that they would say that they know it's not because you mean to but because that's all you know to do. i honestly do think they're being a little hard on you, pile one, especially cause you sound more scared than intentional about this all. i believe that they also think that your head is your own biggest opponent. they describe you as being incredibly perceptive and intelligent but also can overthink to the point where you alone make things up in your mind (they said delusional, I said you have a vivid imagination okay? lmao😭). i think they believe that you also don't talk to them when you have a problem. you believe you alone are responsible for your emotions and while people can say that, they disagree with that 100% when it comes to you.

they want you to come forward and tell them about yourself. tell them about your problems. be frank and open with them, they hate when you box yourself in. I think that they also believe that you've had difficult experiences with being upfront and honest. they would say that you are someone that doesn't have experience speaking her mind and that they know that with time and effort you can come to be more open and that this relationship can be better. I also think that you both are people that have given this relationship a try after having been single for a long time. the only difference I'm seeing is different attachments styles. one having a more healthy way of feeling and the other taking their time to catch up and learn.

with time though, ask them and they'll talk most about how you've progressed. about how you have changed and how every day they meet you, they feel like they are meeting a different you. you're striving for growth, for something more. I believe that they'll talk about how confident and sure of yourself you become. about how much of a leader you've blossomed into.

Pile II. the earth goddess

[7oS, KNoC, AoC, AoP, 7oC, the devil R, the hanged man R]

pile two, trust me when I say that if someone would come up and ask them what they thought about you they would stay quiet and give just a sly grin before walking away. your person is someone very very private. they don't want to speak on anyone unless it's to their face lmao, like they really are someone who values boundaries so much that they only way they'd talk about you is if you were present when they did. they dislike talking about people without their knowledge that's for sure.

anyways I have no idea what your person is so worried about saying since it'd be all good things! your person is more likely to keep these things to themselves though (they would die if anyone heard their inner self cheesing about you). your person would only have positive things to say about you. it seems like you would make a good impression on them since the start since not one bad thing is sticking out to me. i do believe they'd comment on what they like about you.

the innocent way you love, without expecting anything in return. I hear a lot of "I" in this sentences so it's also a lot of talking about how you make them feel, what you inspire in them, more than your own qualities. they feel like you make them want to love. that you make them feel young again where they're receiving those dreaded stomach butterflies once again. I believe that they'd also talk about how healthy you are. they'd comment on how non toxic you are, and how you love in a way that isn't smothering. how you crowd them with love whilst still making sure they have their own space. they'd speak alottt on your way of loving. they'd applaud you for being such a forward thinker. i also believe they'd describe you to be someone that has such a wise mind. they think you're traditional in a way, someone who likes doing things the "right way". they've come to appreciate that a lot in you, you know, your way of loving that is freeing but in a way still comforting and not too far of from what they grew up on and have always known.

Pile III. sweet woman on the floor

[the magician, 3oW, 4oP, 10oS, KoW, the emperor, 7oP]

pile three, your person would struggle to find the words no joke 😭 I don't think that they wouldn't find you absolutely captivating in fact they'd struggle to find the words that would really fit to describe you. i heard "not one word fits you" and i believe them you know? because judging purely based of our cards, you are very very complex.

so lets start off. you are someone who is very grand. and they know this and recognize this. they believe that you are someone who knows what they want and they'd do anything to get it. "unmistakeable confidence in yourself" is what I heard. you have the confidence of something historic I feel, like you've been here for a long time so you know how the rules work and now they're working in your favor. they'd talk about how much of a leader you naturally are. you they've seen you whip people into shape around you with as little as a look. they'd describe how you make people want to better themselves by being around you. they wish luck to people who want to slack off around you. I believe that even though your energy is so fiery and literally just so big and something that packs a punch, you also have this calming aura to yourself that people recognize and love about you. they'd talk about how patient and understanding you can be and how you don't give up on people. I think this is a big one for them, they believe you'd never quit on the people you love. sort of like a king/queen with humility.

I think that's why they struggle to define you. you're almost like a pardox to them. the king/queen with humility really stuck out to me. like someone who is a clear leader and could choose to act better than everyone if they wished, but they don't. instead they act humble and with great care towards everyone. I believe they would also comment on how much of a hard worker you are. how you might have struggled a lot with possessions growing up but you kept at it and it's gotten you so far. they would describe you to be stubborn. someone who doesn't know how to quit. but they also in turn love that about you, because again, you never have people around you acting lazy and it makes them want to be better for you.

Pile IV. femme fatale with the g8n

[6oC, the wheel of fortune, KNoS R, the hierophant, 9oP, 5oW R]

I kept hearing the number five when I was channeling for you pile 4, so it could be possible that your person could think that a. you are super creative and you always know how to have a good time or b. you'd make the best mother/father.

and as soon as I saw our cards, I laughed. we got the six of cups which talks about both things I just mentioned. I believe they'd describe you as someone who hasn't lost their zest for life. someone who still sees the world with wonder. they believe that you remain always eternally youthful. they could even want to protect you for being somewhat naive at times. they would tell anyone who asked how pure hearted you are though. they still believe in the good of your heart and they think and would say that they've found the only person in this earth with a heart of gold. I believe they would talk greatly of your goodness. they value your kindness. they also believe your favored by the universe because of this. I can hear them telling other people that you always get what you want because you don't operate with malice. because you wish even your enemies well. lmao this is not what i expected to get when i was channeling for the pile with a pic of a woman holding a g8n 😅

I believe they could also talk about how sure you are of your decisions. like seriously all I'm getting is your person bigging you up. talking about how patient and serious you can be when you want something. like people could expect you, or even your reputation could imply, that you're slightly or someone that doesn't take stuff seriously. but that's not at all the case they'd say. they would talk about how focused you can be when you want something. how you can reach compromise for the sake of building something greater. they'd talk of your fantastic teamwork.

there's also you living in an abundance mindset which they'd admire. they'd speak about how much you have and how much you've helped them clear out their own mind and be better. there could even be talk about meeting you and things suddenly righting themselves in their life with your faith and confidence.

that was all 💞 forgive the mistakes, I was in a rushhh, love you all 💞 til next timeee 💞💞

Asexual labels explained using cereal

You are in a kitchen, opening a pantry door. It contains every brand of cereal in existence.

Libido- How hungry you are

Sexual Attraction- How appealing each cereal is to you

Sex-Repulsed- The mere act of eating cereal disturbs you. You flee the kitchen to watch Netflix instead.

Sex-Indifferent- Someone brings you a bowl of cereal. Even though you don’t crave cereal, you decide to eat some anyway. Maybe because you want the person to feel happy you’re eating something they provided you. Maybe you’re just that hungry. Regardless, you’re fine with eating it since it’s already there. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t care either.

Sex-favorable- Though you don’t particularly crave cereal, the act of eating cereal is enjoyable. So enjoyable, you go through the trouble of picking a brand to eat.

Asexual with low/no libido- You are rarely hungry, and none of the cereal appeals to you.

Asexual with average/high libido- You are often hungry, but none of the cereal appeals to you.

Aegosexual-  Eating cereal sounds fun in theory but not in practice. You certainly have no interest in eating cereal yourself. You’d rather fantasize about other people eating cereal, thankyouverymuch. 

Gray Asexual- You only like Lucky Charms and Apple Jacks. And maybe Fruity Pebbles but you’re not quite sure.

Demisexual- You see a box of Trix. You are familiar with the rabbit on the box, due to the commercials you’ve seen. You always sympathized with the rabbit for never getting any Trix. There are things in life you’ve wanted but have never gotten. You feel a bond with the rabbit. Suddenly that box of Trix looks tasty.

Fraysexual- You see a box of Cocoa Puffs. You have never heard of Cocoa Puffs in your life. But something about it is oh-so-appealing. You pour yourself a bowl. As you start to eat, you catch a commercial for Cocoa Puffs on TV. You now know what the mascot on the box is like. You lose interest in Cocoa Puffs for reasons you cannot explain.

Lithosexual- You notice a box of Fruit Loops. You feel an urge to eat it. Toucan Sam comes to life and asks you to eat them. This makes you uncomfortable, so you leave to watch Netflix with the sex-repulsed ace.

Reciprosexual- You have no interest in any of the cereal. Not even that box of Frosted Flakes. But Tony the Tiger shows up wanting you to eat the Frosted Flakes. Now that he wants you to eat Frosted Flakes, you want to eat Frosted Flakes. 

Cupiosexual- You want to eat cereal, but none of the cereal looks appealing. Maybe if you grab that box of Corn Flakes, it’ll become appealing to you later? It’s happened to other people. You consider grabbing that box of Corn Flakes, just in case.

Orchidsexual- Some of the cereal looks appealing, but you have no interest in eating cereal.

Aceflux- None of the cereal looks good, so you close the pantry. A few days later, you decide to open the pantry again. Now, some of those brands look appetizing. You check the pantry again the next day. None of the cereal looks good anymore.

Quoisexual- You have no idea if you like a cereal because you want to eat it, or if you just think the box art is pretty. Does liking the box art count as wanting to eat it? Do you just like the mascot? Does liking the mascot count as wanting to eat the cereal? After reading everything I’ve written, you are still confused. You bang your head against the pantry in frustration.

Hey love! how's your day going? mine was tiring lol I can't wait to fall asleep. I wanted to request an astrological compatibility ship for me with 1. SVT Vernon and 2. Bang Chan from skz! My big six are: Sun + Mercury in Sag 8H; Moon, Mars in 6H Libra (conjunct my 7H Scorpio venus), and Taurus rising! Thank you so much and I hope you have a blessed day ahead<33

Avatar

Oh no I hope tomorrow will be better and not so tiring like today🥺 rest well love and cheer up for tomorrow 🦋 always feel free to come around and request anything you want if it can help you rest (make sure to dm me so I can and will work on it quicker)🥰

Vernon - 60%

BangChan - 80%

Avatar
Avatar
yoongimingyu

Sure | Part 4 (Vernon)

Rating/genre: M (18+), friends to lovers; fluff, smut 💖 Pairings: Fem!Reader x Vernon Warnings: Explicit smut, vaginal penetration (no protection mentioned), oral sex (f receiving), no obvious dom/sub dynamics, they are both switches but reader is slightly more dominant in this one, use of ‘good boy’ and ‘baby’, praise, hair pulling (m receiving), very mild mention of Vernon having insecurities, not really any angst honestly, just Vernon simping, mention of reader wearing some of his clothes Word Count: 7.0k Summary: The next morning…

Part 1, Part 2Part 3(if you just want smut 💖, you can read this without reading the other parts, but this smut is pretty infused with feelings/plot)

You were still asleep. His bed had never felt so warm. Perhaps that was just in contrast to the chill in his apartment – no doubt thanks to the heavy snow falling outside. But Vernon wanted to think it was you. No, he was sure it was you. So cute in his shirt and pyjama pants that you’d slowly pulled on – as if you’d never worn something of his before. 

As much as he’d tried to make it seem like no big deal, he had been hesitant to offer, hesitant to suggest that you actually sleep over. Everything felt like it had so much weight to it. Every word so heavy in his hands, threatening to tumble to the floor and shatter. What was too far? Like you, he could no longer see any of the lines that had been so bolded, so unmissable for the last two years. 

How about a rafe fic where instead of the “sweet girl that balances him out” it’s equally crazy girlfriend who joins him in his chaos and he actually talks her down bc she’s always ready to go to war? And she’s the only person able to strike fear into him? Ultimate power villain couple

Avatar

oh god is this what makes me start writing again

She's in the Rain

  • pairing; choi seungcheol (scoups) x reader (no body parts mentioned just title of the song)
  • genre; angst
  • warnings; argument, alludes to unhappy relationship, crying, alludes to depression, mild comfort at the end
  • w/c; 1.2k and some change 
  • requested; no
  • she's in the rain - the rose
  • a/n; this is one of my favorite songs by The Rose and I keep thinking about writing a bunch of fics based on angsty songs. so this if the first one

Seungcheol sighs softly as he watches you stare out the window. The droplets of water from the rain traveled down the glass like tears. He knew you were upset, that was a constant state for the two of you recently. When the relationship had been new, there was the honeymoon phase. Neither one of you could do anything wrong. You both fell so fast, you made decisions without much thought and now the two of you could barely spend an afternoon in the same room without an argument over something ridiculous.

He loved you. There was no question about that. You were his entire heart but there was only so far that love could carry a person and sometimes Seungcheol had to wonder if his love for you was causing more pain for the both of you. It was times like this, one snide comment from either of you would cause the apartment to go cold and silent for extended periods of time. Was love worth the loneliness? 

“Are you going to stare at the window all evening? Or are we going to discuss what you said?” 

PAC / Details about the love of your life 💕

I'm back my lovesss! 💖 I'm late with this pac as always but I have to be a responsible adult too. As always with love spreads I try to write with no gender, I always talk about dominant energy of your FS. Take a cup of tea cause this is a long spread

Decks I used: Enchanted love tarot, dark wood tarot, astrodices, romance angels oracle, love oracle cards, goddess guidance oracle and the hidden truth oracle.

Take a deep breath and choose the pile you feel more drawn to, you can choose more than 1 if you feel it, maybe you have more messages in more piles. Take always what resonates and leave the rest

I love you 🥰

Rafe Cameron’s psycho analysis

What’s wrong with Rafe?

Warnings : mental health, abuse, trauma, depression, violence, drugs

Knowing that I study psychology, and that i have a certain toxic taste for villains in general, i really want to write my psychological analysis on the character of Rafe Cameron in Outer Banks.

Obviously I'm not a psychologist (well not yet), the goal is not to have a 100% real analysis, I just want to give my opinion by arguing my words as best as possible.

I read and inform myself a lot about mental / behavioral disorders, mental pathologies, the different types of behavior or reactions of people, it fascinates me and allows me both an understanding of others, but also of myself.

Also, i do speak english fluenty but it isn’t my first language so i may make some mistakes, please don’t mind them.

no more talk lets get into it :)

To put things into context, Rafe Cameron is Ward Cameron's eldest son and Sarah and Wheezie's brother.

Since the beginning of season 1, we quickly realize that Ward is very protective of his daughter, Sarah, but doesn’t seem to care about his other children, Rafe and Wheezie. He is shown to be emotionally and psychologically abusive towards his son Rafe, and his neglect is visible when he finds out that Rafe was spending his money on drugs after dropping out of college. We see through the first episodes Ward's differential treatment of his son and daughter, one is literally called "the princess" while the brother lives in his sister's shadow, seen as a rebellious and insignificant delinquent.

What is not emphasized enough is how much favoritism towards a child can be the consequence of significant psychological trauma. Every child wants attention. If you deny it to them, or take it away from them, it is normal that they´ll do everything to get it back better. The problem is that they unconsciously choose the "wrong" type of behavior. As a result, aggressiveness, tearfulness, or overly strong or even obsessive attachment can be observed in the child. Children observe their parents, easily imitate their mood and become their reflection. Does that remind you of anyone? His father, Ward Cameron is a liar, manipulator, egocentric with a narcissistic tendency capable of anything to achieve his ends. Finally we can clearly see that his favoritism and negligence towards his son turned him into his carbon copy.

In case of obvious favoritism, there are two possibilities, a child who will be "studious", and hard on himself, always aiming for perfection, for fear of disappointment. Or a child who will feel very sure of himself, but who can also become very narcissistic, due to an injustice wound* (which I will develop later) In this case, we observe a child who demands attention as a right, but does not show gratitude if he receives it. The child will often think he is better than the others, has high expectations of others, difficulty maintaining friendships. In adulthood, narcissism can lead to big problems in personal and professional life because the individual needs constant attention, to be the center of the world.

Obviously, another aspect that may seem logical, the complex sibling relationship. Arguments and fights, which start when children see a situation as unfair. When a child repeatedly receives less love and attention than their sibling, it can become a trigger for arguments, jealousy. Even when they become adults, they fail to find common ground, and often fail to forgive or forget. This is the case with Rafe and Sarah, he does not hate his sister, but he envies and jealous her, and resents her for having always been the favorite, to the point where he tried to kill her under an excess of anger.

Finally, the last point I wanted to address on favoritism is the behavior of the child growing up towards his parents. If you consistently show less love to a child, it can have a big impact on your communication with them in the future. When your child becomes an adult, he may decide to ignore you or even in some cases to take revenge. He only reflects the behavior you had towards him. It can be a conscious or unconscious choice. Here we can see that Rafe tried everything to receive his father's validation and attention, but even trying the best he could, Ward put all the blame on him until he told him that because of him "fucked us all", that he had "dirtyed their family", and that he would never be "a Cameron"

Now I will address the wound of betrayal and injustice which can be closely linked to favoritism.

There are 5 psychological wounds also called "soul wounds". It is these wounds that will cause physical, emotional and mental problems. It is these wounds that will prevent us from being ourselves. Emotional wounds are formed during our childhood before the age of 10. Most of the time, these wounds emerge from the parents or parent figures, and are done without their will.

The 5 injuries identified are:

- rejection

- abandonment

- humiliation

- betrayal

- injustice

Most of the time, one injury will dominate the others, however it can be associated with other injuries. We all develop certain injuries, which will have a greater or lesser impact on our lives. Faced with this "aggression", we put in place, in an unconscious way, "masks". These masks are defense strategies that will be put in place automatically and which will prevent us from being ourselves, from behaving as we would like. do it. Thus, in order to no longer be limited by these masks, it is necessary for us to identify his wounds and accept them.

*be careful, not every wound forms the same, it is not because scientifically it has been proven that they appear at a fixed age or the sex of a specific parent, that this is always the case.

The Wound of Injustice : This is the first thing I noticed through Rafe, a lack of empathy and emotion, certainly linked to his difficult childhood, where he had to create a mask, a shell to be able to defend himself against to his father, and the favoritism he experienced over his sister. The wound of injustice is often caused by devaluation and often leads to perfectionism, to wanting to be strong and by a need for recognition. If you noticed well in season 1 and 2, Rafe tries everything to have the recognition of his father, he wants to be perfect, to appear strong, both physically and mentally after killing Sheriff Peterkin. We see very little of his emotions, he tries to show that everything is fine, but we often see him losing control through various impulsive and violent acts, which perfectly illustrate his unhappiness and his internal wound.

Main symptoms:

- Create a rigid, cold mask

- Push back his wound

- Being resentful towards others and oneself

- Divert your sensitivity

- Authority

- Seeking justice and perfection

- Being unfair to oneself

- Suppress feelings

- Wanting to feel strong in the eyes of others, untouchable

- Need of recognition

The awakening of the injury occurs between 4 and 6 years. This wound often forms with the parent of the same sex who will be perceived by the child as being distant, cold, rigid. The wound of injustice will bring out the mask of rigidity. These are people who will appear without any emotion, insensitive. They will tend to hide their emotions, wanting to be "strong". Because for them emotions are a sign of weakness. In permanent control, these are people who will tend to organize everything in their lives. This hurt can arise because of a toxic family such as toxic parents or overbearing parents within your household which then creates a toxic relationship between yourself and your mother or father. It develops through the actions of your parents towards you.

For example, your father or mother may encourage you to follow the model of your sister or brother during your childhood. An obligation of excellence and a desire for perfectionism were then created, developing this wound of injustice. It is caused by the devaluation of the child and causes excessive emotional reactions in you. When a person is injured by injustice, it is common for them to hold resentment towards others and themselves. Indeed, his constant quest for excellence gives him varied emotions and a high degree of requirement.

A rigid person will be more likely to develop anger towards themselves and towards others. Just like other wounds, injustice is going to have to fill a need. For the latter, it is a need for recognition that must take place. How to heal it: It is important to learn to reconnect with your emotions, your needs, while accepting that everything is not "perfect", to make mistakes. Accept each of your emotions to avoid panic attacks related to emotional denial, "overflow" and impulsivity attacks.

The Wound of Betrayal: This wound has a lot in common with the wound of injustice, namely the need to control everything, and the difficulty of adapting to society. It's a hurt I've seen in Rafe as well, and it's been showing especially since Season 3. After he did everything for his dad, never receiving any gratitude or recognition, that hurt was definitely more seen in him. He started wanting to take control of everything, even his father, where we see the paradox with season 2 and 3 when the father hits Rafe saying "it's me who decides here" and the season 3 where Rafe takes control over his father by fighting with him and tells him "I'm talking now". We notice a darker aspect of him, in particular through his manipulative, lying side, his difficulty in trusting, his impulsiveness, his authority and his resentment. It's a wound that can stay untouched in us until it "explodes" at some point in our lives (disappointment, betrayal, offense, humiliation), at which point the brain sets up a system of protection through the mask of the "controller" to avoid any occurrences of harming us. It is a wound that leads to emotional denial, which in the long run leads to anxiety, phobias and a lot of stress.

Main symptoms:

- Always need to control

- Strong personality

- Authoritarian

- Very demanding of himself and others

- Anticipation (control even in the future)

- Trust issues

- liar, but hates lies in others

- Speed ​​and intelligence (learn very quickly)

- Sensitive but not demonstrative

- Cares a lot about other people's business - Internal anger

- Arrogance

- Difficulty in his love/sexual life because he idealizes his/her partner and cannot let go

Its development takes place between the ages of 2 and 4 years, often with the parent of the opposite sex. Wakes up when the child feels betrayed, manipulated by his parent.

The wound of betrayal, will bring the mask of the controller. The controller is a manipulative person who needs to control everything that happens around them, be it their projects, their relationships, people. She needs to hold the reins and everything goes her way. Seductive, she attaches great importance to the material side or to the image. Controllers will have a strong personality, with an overactive mind and impulsiveness. Controlling people will fear both engagement and disengagement. As part of the betrayal wound, people will have a strong need for trust. For this this need can be filled by the self-confidence and the confidence that she can have towards others (which is very rare because often she has confidence only in herself, and gives her confidence only to a number of very restricted individuals) How to heal the wound of betrayal: Healing will go through learning to let go, accepting that you cannot control everything, and that it does not make you weak.

Now I'm going to talk about Rafe's drug addiction, which is something to consider. Anxiety, relational problems, past traumas and the malaise felt are often at the origin of these uses. Belonging to a group, feeling accepted: the concern for recognition or belonging is very important for teenagers. It is also a way to escape from the real world, and to forget the stress or the pressure, the daily problems. Rafe through his conflicted relationship with his family, got himself a drug dealer, barry and dove into drugs. Not only weed but also cocaine, considered a hard drug, which has many repercussions on health and behavior. The two drugs that Rafe uses are cannabis and cocaine. We feel his addiction especially when he goes to beg his dealer Barry, to sell him rails, against his motorcycle, promising him a large sum of money. But do you really know the effects of these drugs?

Cannabis will "unstuck" and facilitate social relationships. It will relax and relax some people in the face of stress and anxiety in the family, school and / or professional environment. Well-being and relaxation will make you want to feel these effects again. Consumption is increasing and it must be found by all means. Professional and social detachment ensues. There is evidence that cannabis use increases the risk of developing psychotic disorders.

*won’t talk about physical disorders but there are many

* psychic disorders: in the short or medium term (anxiety, suffocation, confusion, nervousness, panic, phobias, delusions, mood instability, hallucinations...), during the "descent" (depressive state, withdrawal) and more or less long term (aggravation or revelation of a mental illness, depression, suicide, etc.)

* social risks: disinhibition can lead to outbursts of violence and/or an inability to defend oneself (loss of self-control, provocative attitudes exposing to aggression, etc.), changes in perception can endanger those around them, even cause accidents...

Cocaine is a potent stimulant that induces instant euphoria, a feeling of great self-confidence, intellectual and physical power, and indifference to pain and fatigue. It cancels out any shyness and gives the illusion of relational ease, a feeling of performance and confidence. When this phase ends, it means that the reserve of neuromediators is exhausted, giving way to a state of strong depression, an anxiety that can lead to alleviating this state by taking heroin or cannabis.

Long-term consumption leads to serious psychic disorders, great mood instability and paranoid delusions, panic attacks and severe depression.

Stopping acute cocaine use is very difficult, because this drug brings a feeling of well-being. The behavior of a cocaine addict is akin to paranoia, because he is convinced that he has the right reasoning and that his actions are right. Weaning is very difficult, because the memory of pleasure remains for a long time, months or even years after the cessation of consumption. A relapse during this period is very likely.

After reading about the effects of these drugs, you might have been able to make the connection with Rafe, the fact that he took drugs to "feel better" and forget his discomfort. Maybe you went through it too, or not, anyway even if it partly made him so unpredictable and irritable in his actions, basically it proves once again that it was only one more misunderstood teenager, who also wanted to taste happiness.

Besides, I mentioned paranoia vis-à-vis cocaine, which I will develop from now on.

The person with paranoia is suspicious, they feel constantly threatened and persecuted. She interprets situations, words, behaviors in an erroneous way. A word or a look can be enough to awaken in her the feeling of persecution. There are several theories aimed at defining the causes of paranoia. Some claim that the disease results from a narcissistic wound, a long-standing wound that the subject has kept buried deep inside him and which makes him particularly vulnerable. Others argue that brain microlesions are the cause of the disease. Head trauma, alcohol or drug use, stress or lack of oxygen to the brain could be responsible for these lesions. Note that Rafe started to really lose control when he killed Sheriff Peterkin, but that already before when he was on drugs he tended to show signs of paranoia.

The main symptoms:

- Exaggerated distrust

- A paranoid person is convinced that the people around him seek to deceive him, exploit him, harm him, manipulate him.

- The doubt

- She doubts the friendship, fidelity, benevolence of those around her, family, friends or professional.

- The tendency to secrecy (The paranoid person confides very little fear that what she says will be used against her)

- Negative interpretation (A word, a sigh, a silence, an action, a banal behavior, everything is interpreted in a negative way. The paranoid person interprets everything and believes he sees humiliating, aggressive, threatening innuendoes everywhere.

- Resentment: Feeling (most often wrongly) hurt, humiliated, used, even insulted, this person does not forgive the person he considers to have been aggressive towards him

- Aggressiveness: This person, feeling constantly threatened, humiliated, hurt, easily reacts with anger or aggressiveness, a reaction that is often incomprehensible to those around him.

- Suspicion: The entourage is suspected of deceiving, of plotting. Also come into play: - An overvaluation of oneself and undervaluation of others;

- excessive pride;

- tyrannical authoritarianism;

- the absence of self-criticism;

- a disorder of social relations;

- passionate reactions to real or supposed events: threats of lawsuits, money affairs, rivalries

- major depression with the possibility of violent action (murder or attempts)

One scene in particular caught my attention when I thought about paranoia was when the police arrive and Cameron is with his dad, in a state of shock and completely disconnected from reality after the murder he comes commit. He tells his father that the pressure is too strong, that he will not be able to get away with it, that he has terrible scenarios going on in his head. Since this episode, he has become twice as violent, twice as aggressive, nothing takes on disproportionate dimensions, he lives in constant fear and guilt. From there we have seen the rise in power of his anger issues, his excessive violence (in his vocabulary, by knocking into the walls, by trying to kill several times) There are a number of emotions that go hand in hand with anger. You may notice the following emotional symptoms: irritability, frustration, anxiety, rage, stress and feeling overwhelmed, guilty. Once again these are character traits very present in Rafe.

On the other hand, before making my conclusion I would like to give you my opinion in relation to the statuses of psychopaths and sociopaths that people tend to give him. For me, these two terms are used excessively, to such an extent that we do not know exactly what these two pathologies are linked to. Because of the world of entertainment, films, series, books, the term psychopath or sociopath is used in all directions, most of the time simply to describe a person who is overwhelmed by his emotions, who does not fit into social norms and unpredictable, often led to kill, torture, kidnap etc. Very often your favorite characters have many pathologies, but none of them are psychopathy.

Why do I think Rafe is neither a sociopath nor a psychopath?

*note that the two pathologies are very similar, we will tend to distinguish sociopathy by more impulsiveness, and linked to the social environment, while the psychopath, will plan and be more in the observation (Joe Goldberg in You can be an example, although there are many other disorders), the psychopath is explained by a mixture of psychological, biological, genetic and environmental factors. The term psychopathy has disappeared from the classifications of mental disorders, but it is still used to describe a complex personality disorder, now called antisocial personality disorder.

Among the main symptoms are:

- inability to conform to laws and social norms

- the tendency to deceive for profit or pleasure (indicated by repeated lies, the use of pseudonyms, scams)

- impulsiveness or inability to plan ahead - irritability or aggressiveness (indicated by repeated fights or assaults) reckless disregard for one's safety or that of others

- persistent irresponsibility (indicated by inability to hold steady employment or meet financial obligations)

- the absence of remorse (indicated by the fact of being indifferent or justifying oneself after having hurt, mistreated or robbed another)

Admittedly, the symptoms highlighting violence are found in Rafe, but the big difference between him and the profile of the psychopath is the feeling of guilt. Many times in the series, we can see how Rafe is consumed by remorse, how guilty he feels. The psychopath does not have access to this emotion, he has a total lack of empathy and does harm for pleasure. He never questions himself. Again, Rafe is not violent for fun, he did not kill Peterkin for fun, he blamed himself. He knows he's a bad person and completely destroyed by his own actions, which he still tries to hide behind his mask of a cold and powerful man.

Conclusion

Here is my conclusion on this character, in my opinion underdeveloped: Rafe Cameron went through traumas in his life that had significant emotional consequences on his life. These psychic traumas are like open wounds if we do not treat them, they follow us as we grow and can get worse, triggering trouble after trouble and deeply affecting our personality. Since our identity is forged until our 7-8 years generally, a toxic environment during childhood is the cause of most of our problems as adults or adolescents. Here with Rafe, we could see how favoritism can totally destroy a child, as well as his life in the long term if he does not heal from this wound. I may sound mean, but no parent is perfect, and even if you love them, some of the hurts you have today were caused by them without you even knowing it. An injury can come from even a very small remark, a very small detail that was made to you. And yet this little detail will follow you for years, until sometimes you have a behavior that does not look like you. Yes, if Rafe is like that today it is the fault of his father, Ward. The fact that he is not known his biological mother is surely also hard for him. He is a young man in pain, haunted by himself, who has a deep unhappiness.

He's not a psychopath, he seems anxious, guilty. He has a wound of betrayal and injustice, vulnerable narcissistic tendencies, a paranoid personality, drug addictions and anger issues. He's not inherently a bad person, he just never experienced a healthy environment and genuine parental love. Now I'm not saying he's forgivable, he tried to kill half of the protagonists, including his own sister. He killed the sheriff too. His violent acts, his impulsiveness and his hatred for pogues (which again I believe is closely tied to his father) makes him a "bad guy" that most outer banks fans describe as "loathsome" and I can understand it.

Nevertheless I think for my part that he is a complex and deep character who could have been better developed in order to not just show this "psychopathic" side to the public but precisely the aspect of the lost and wounded man that he is. . I hope season 4 brings him a healthier environment and better development :) even a love affair with Sofia (apparently confirmed)

I hope you liked it and that it helped you better understand this character! Do not hesitate to give your opinion in comment and to like!❤️

Disclaimer: These general free readings are made in good faith for entertainment purpose.
Warnings:There are piles that contain more personal subjects such as trauma.

Hello dear, how are you? The most votes PAC was Your True Passion, I am doing all the themes on the list little by little since all of them received votes. Thank you all for participating and I hope you enjoy your reading!

How to pick a pile

When you have different cards to choose from in pile 1,2,3… look at each of those cards. Wait until someone reminds you of a memory. Perhaps a character’s outfit resembles one of your own. It is this pile that has its message. What if they all remind me of something? Go for the one with the strongest memory, one might look like her earring but another might be the favorite candy you got from your grandma when you vacationed at her house. But what if none reminds me of something? Take a deep breath and wait a little longer, without charging yourself or creating worries. Relax, some will awaken some memory in you, I promise! .
Credits: Piles images: here. Template: here

Pile 1

Your true passion involves helping humanity in its most catastrophic moments. There is helping someone who needs a meal and there is helping someone who has lost everything and sees no reason to live, you're in the second case. This includes social assistance, medicine, fortune telling, firefighter, police officer... Jobs that often require you to see a person in their most vulnerable moment, jobs where you can save a life in various ways, witness various stories and change several lives.

To get closer to this today, you need energy, to have your own will to live and face life, today you no longer have that sparkle in your eyes, that fire in your soul... It may be due to physical, mental and psychological reasons. If it's physical, seek your nutritionist and doctor to give you the necessary vitamins. If it's mental, improve all your self-knowledge and look for books and courses that can improve your essence. If it's psychological, look for the most accessible therapy for you, don't give up, you're not lazy, you're unhealthy.

You can also do the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 75:

Booster Walk You’ll need: - A music device and airphones; - A relaxing and safe route for walking; Make sure you’re wearing comfortable walking shoes. Put your phones on, and start walking quickly! As you breathe in and out, using long, deep breaths, imagine white light flowing through you, invigorating your body, mind and spirit. With every step, feel your energy boosting. Walk as long you feel this energy.

After you have reconnected with your essence, there are several ways to exercise your true passion in your life as a whole. Here I present three.

One of them is to help sick or vulnerable people such as children and the elderly. You will need a lot of spiritual strength, to live a life where you know that when you leave your house, your pains and problems are left behind and the only thing that matters is helping someone else. You will need to be a person who has the courage to do whatever it takes and assume all your responsibilities, because here you will have to embody all the stereotypes of what a responsible adult really is.

The second involves more writing, but not exactly creative writing, but rather a more didactic one, such as being a teacher of any type of subject. If you happen to be the type who hates studying out of responsibility, there is also the other side of living for dance,so the effort of living with your face in books and huge texts is all going to learn about your own body, in these two options they both involve a lot of teaching for future generations, you learn to accumulate knowledge and help the next person not to make the mistakes you made.

The third and last one talks about building communities that support people in their doubts and difficulties, creating a safe space where people can be their best version and this doesn't need to be anything grand, it can be a place where they can gather to have an afternoon coffee and talk about dreams and nightmares.

In all three options, there is a lot of hope for a better future and a confrontation against the cruelty of the world, you need to learn from your own tragedies, live them and leave them behind to help others.

Pile 2

Your true passion is to succeed in life, to be better than your parents ever were, to rub in the faces of people who bullied you in school that you are much better than them. For this, you will need to align two very difficult things... which are ego and humility. You will need to have a healthy self-esteem and ego to know that you are capable and humility to not think you are better than everyone else and step on others. What is lacking for you to do this today is motivation, it’s like you want to do something but can’t see any path to achieve that goal. I will give you a spell from my book, but know that to get what you want you will have to follow a different path from your friends and ancestors, you will have to chase your dreams alone and fight for them until they become a reality.

But to give you a little push now, I give you the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 125-126:

The Garden of Motivation Take a section of the yard, if not possible pick a vase, you will consecrate as your motivation garden. Each day you will tend to it taking any amount of time needed. Weed, water, feed and care for this garden, picturing what you want it to be in the future. Add anything to your garden that makes you happy, such as wind chimes, garden sculptures, gemstones, outdoor candle holders and pretty stones. This is your garden, so make it and keep it a reflection of yourself, and your motivation. When weeding your garden, you’re in turn weeding away the negativity from you. As you nurture and cultivate this garden over time you’re nurturing and cultivating your own ambitions. As an extra tip, you can plant something and give it your dream name or even your own name. If you truly want results, you will enjoy the work to achieve them. Happy gardening!!!

There are always more than one way to achieve your dreams, I talk about three.

The first one talks much more about enjoying your own life than anything else, you know, there comes a point where we have everything we wanted years ago and still aren't happy because we want more things, that is, we didn't even enjoy all the effort we had. You will need to take a break from the rush of life from time to time to pamper yourself, to see how much you have achieved and be proud of what you already have.

The second way is to leave the city or country where you were born, maybe you already have the dream of living somewhere else, a connection with another culture that you don't even understand what it is, but for you to be happy with your life you you will need to face the fear of abandoning all the comfort and security of living in a place you already know to go somewhere you don't know.

The third is to do almost the same thing as the second, leave where you live (do you hate your home? just kidding), but now it's for work and study. Where is the best college you can go? Can you go there? You should.

All options speak of physically leaving the place where you are and not stressing yourself thinking about all the things you still need to do, but being aware that you are responsible for achieving your dreams without being tied to the future, enjoying the present and being proud from past.

Pile 3

Your true passion is independence. Not owing anything to anyone, not having to wait for someone else's decision to do what you want. You want to be rich and enjoy everything you have sown. You are afraid of having to ask for something from someone, since you want to be your own provider and what is lacking today is a more abundant look. There are times when you are very pessimistic, more afraid of running out of something than acquiring something, it's like you chase after things not because you want them, but because you're afraid of running out. It's like you go to work not because you want to spend the money to buy McDonald's or enter that course, but to not run out of money when you need it.

Something that can help you get rid of this fear of scarcity is the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 147:

Prosperity Bath You’ll need: - Fresh ginger root; - A handful of cinnamon sticks; - A bunch of fresh basil; - A piece of cheesecloth and rubber band Put all ingredients into the cheesecloth and tie with the rubber band. Allow the pouch to soak in the water as you run your bath. When you step into your bath, relax and envision prosperity streaming to you. Know that you will receive all that you need. (Julia notes: normally we do our baths making a “tea” with the ingredients and at the end of your normal bath you pour the “tea” into your body, avoiding your head, and then you let your body dry naturally).

There are several ways to achieve your true passion, but I always mention three:

The first is going back to doing that childhood dream that you left behind a long time ago because you thought it didn't make money. What was? Sing, draw, write, paint? You can go back to doing what you like, but now as an adult you have the opportunity to study, take a course and improve your skills.

The second thing you can do is much more perverse... You hold a lot of grudges from people who hurted you. You carry a lot of trauma and anger and that's it, either you take revenge the way you want or leave all that behind and move on with your life, go to a therapist or solve your problems, the way you are now, no no matter what you do, it's going to be out of fear and not for passion.

The third talks about opening yourself up more to life's possibilities, you've been so locked up, so focused on survival and forgot that you can just live, the world is full of opportunities and you have the competence to put effort into something and make it your own work or hobby, you don't have to beat yourself up, you don't have to suffer to be worthy of happiness.

All options speak of fear and trauma, of how you are still chained to the past and it is not letting you be happy, know that time heals all wounds and that life does not give greater challenges than our own strength.

Pile 4

Your true passion is to answer "What is the meaning of life?", because you want to live it. There is a lot of curiosity here, wanting to know more, having answers to all questions and a tiredness of seeing that everything is always the same,like the world will never change. What you have control over and can change is yourself, the world will change... in very, very slow steps, until then, revitalize yourself every day.

Something that can help you have energy is the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 184:

Vitality Broom Dance You’ll need: - A broom; - Citrus-scented incense, or citrus essential oil and an oil diffuser; - Upbeat music; Light the incense or oil diffuser. Begin playing the music. With your broom, begin sweeping the room in unison to the beat of the music. Sweep in a counterclockwise direction to purify the room and remove negative energies. Then, sweep clockwise direction to build harmony, balance and vitality. This spell will get your cells pulsating as you awaken the healing flow of vitality within and around you.

There are several ways to make your dreams come true, but I always indicate three:

The first is to pursue knowledge and get involved with younger people or those whom you have seen as ignorant until now. Everyone has their truths, and uneducated people often learn too much from life. Maybe you have that simple grandmother who knows how to do many things... Be aware that you will be an eternal apprentice, carrying your own truth without needing to harm others.

The second way is to get involved with people in a joyful way, to celebrate life and have fun with all the material world. Life is abundant and has a lot to offer you, you can learn not only in studies, but also at parties and conversations.

The last one is already the most complicated, as it talks about being able to maintain a balance between social life and solitary life. You are very prone to work which the law (judges, lawyers), professions that require a lot of studying to achieve, that suffer their own dangers and pleasures. You can follow this path, but you can't get lost in it and become dogmatic.

All options talk about people, you you can learn from people, how you can you protect them when necessary. Don't be afraid of society, you will see that there are many more good people than bad ones, it's just that the bad ones are louder.

Avatar

this reading found me exactly when i needed some guidance. both pile 2 and pile 4 were spot on. thank you so much for this!

Avatar

charity f*ck (k.s)

Have you ever taken anyone’s virginity before? Well, yeah, your first time was both losing your own and taking someone else’s but, that was a long time ago. Have you ever taken the virginity of a twenty-six-year-old man who probably should have gotten laid by now anyway? Nope. Are you about to? Yep.
or the one where soonyoung has a streak of bad luck in bed and his friends make fun of him for it, you find him advertising himself on a dating app and decide to help him out.

ao3 | m.listminors dni! | kindly leave feedback and reblog, i will kiss your forehead so fucking fast if you do. 

WORDCOUNT― 12.2k

PAIRING― soonyoung x afab reader 

CONTENT― virgin guy who lives with his parents!soonyoung, he’s not shy but he is very clumsy, a lot of texting so be prepared for that format for a lil bit (THIS IS NOT A SOCIAL MEDIA AU), facetime-sex, real life sex

SIDE CHARACTERS― Vernon as reader’s best friend and roommate, Seungcheol briefly as Hoshi’s friend.

WARNINGS― he’s made fun of by his friends for being a virgin, this is not an indication that you shouldn’t remain a virgin if you still are one! it’s fictional and i do not agree with mocking someone for their virginity in real life.

NOTE― i love him and i like the idea of him being clumsy during sex, i also like the idea of him being inexperienced but suuuuuuper eager to pretend he knows what he’s doing. shoutout to my redacted wife @onlyseokmins for proof reading this <3 

smut tags under cut:: 

when he first slips it in and all you can do is whimper over how good he feels and he looks you in the eyes n says "awww baby, is this what you missed? how cute" then digs his nails into your hips and fucks you into a new reality.

sweet-cynical-deactivated202212

my goal is to constantly tiptoe the line between cute and hot so that you don't know whether to squish my face and call me a good girl or fuck me senseless until I'm crying

Hey y’all I’ve been looking through the Goncharov (1973) posts, and it seems like most people aren’t aware of the master document, which has all the lore, behind the scenes, and plot breakdown. It’s collaborative, so we can all make sure we get the most accurate depiction of everyone’s favorite movie :)

for the skz ask game!!

Levanter🥲😌💞💫🙌

I'm Nikita and I was born on Dec 1 2002!

Avatar

Hi Nikita! AoW, 7oC, 6oC, Justice In the year of 2023, you're going to be reconnecting with a lot of things. For example: creativity, old relationships of all types, even past versions of yourself. I would say remember to celebrate, but do not fall into the trap of romanticizing. This is coming to you for you to transform and pay it forward to yourself. Nobody else. Take this year to be nearly entirely preoccupied with yourself.

Avatar
Avatar

I like this a lot! since a majority of 2023 is going to be my 9H profection year