I’ve been laughing for 5 minutes

we became adults. and we forgot about that one lizard that can run on top of the water. and the bombardier beetle. we don't even think about mako sharks being the fastest shark anymore.

a book: a flea can jump 200 times their body length! cheetahs can run up to 70 miles per hour, but they can only keep up this speed for about a quarter mile! the smallest mammal is the pygmy shrew!

me, 7 years old, convinced that this information is of the utmost importance:

We all should have the list of the top 10 fastest, strongest, smallest, and largest animals in our minds at all times, for quick reference

Not a day should pass in our mortal lives without considering the Wobbegong Shark

Oh my god I am Considering

RIGHT?????HE'S SUCH A FUCKING FLAT GUY.

Best way to celebrate flat fuck Friday? Look at the wobblegong shark.

hold on y'all forgot this stuff? i cannot control my referencing them always on every date

HOUSE M.D. 5.11 JOY TO THE WORLD

You’re telling me a LOBSTER squeezed this lime?

Gin and clawnic

This is the future the Flintstones wanted for us.

X2: X-Men United (2003)

This cracked me up.

(Source.)

Years ago, Tumblr showed me this ad for my local mechanic, clearly targeting gay car owners — effectively I might say! I screenshot it and posted to Tumblr. Today I found that Tumblr has flagged it as inappropriate. To which I could only respond "but... YOU showed this to ME."

Tumblr, you are self-loathing. Get yourself together.

Ok but did you go? Was it as gay as this ad makes it seem?

Clash of titties

if this isnt gender equality i dont know

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This made me laugh for a couple of minutes it is so hilarious and cute!

This made my day:33

"... “I’m taking action because I feel desperate,” said U.S. climate scientist Peter Kalmus, who along with several others locked himself to the front door of a JPMorgan Chase building in Los Angeles. A recent report found that the financial giant is the biggest private funder of oil and gas initiatives in the world.

“It’s the 11th hour in terms of Earth breakdown, and I feel terrified for my kids, and terrified for humanity,” Kalmus continued. “World leaders are still expanding the fossil fuel industry as fast as they can, but this is insane. The science clearly indicates that everything we hold dear is at risk, including even civilization itself and the wonderful, beautiful, cosmically precious life on this planet. I actually don’t get how any scientist who understands this could possibly stay on the sidelines at this point.” ..."

Every single denialist depends on the idea that big brother government and climate scientists are on the same side so how do they even begin to fit this into their delusion?

???

What part of that is upcycled?

source

I SCREAMED

Omg. My jaw dropped.

Welp... he got his shit wrecked after all

why is he having this conversation with what looks to be his mom???