ifonlymp3-deactivated20220624
gonna fuck around and start saying i DO condone the actions of my problematic fav fictional characters
you walk in here and they deal with every single problem youve ever experienced in your life and then you go to the cash register and they kill you
i call this the “when you’re exploring the gothic castle that you’ve been warned to stay away from by the locals because it’s rumored to be the home of one or more vampires after dark” look
generalgrievousdatingsim
Leonardo: *sighs* this date is boring
Comte: this isn’t a date. I said I was going to the store
Leonardo: then why did you invite me?
Comte: I didn’t. I specifically said “don’t come with me” then you said “fuck you comte I’ll do whatever I want”
Shutdown
Summary: Thomas is stuck in his own head. When Thomas is in a car accident, Virgil has to enact a ‘failsafe’ that shuts everything and everyone down but himself. To his shock, Thomas, who is convinced that his sides are characters he has made up, appears inside his mental ‘control room’. And he… can’t leave.
Warnings: naw i dont think so this time?
Read on AO3 if you like
AN: guys, y'all will not believe this. Turns out, when you actually plan out stories, they suddenly are easier to continue lol. I am so sorry for not updating forever uhhhh… yeah. i’d recommend looking over the last chapter if you dont remember whats going on, because I sure didn’t. This is a bit shorter than the other chapters, but i have more coming and its 3 am now…
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Chapter 8
Virgil didn’t really know what it meant to ‘chill’. But he was trying as he sat in the car, struggling with the seatbelt. Joan looked concerned.
“You don’t have to smile if you don’t want to.”
Virgil dropped his attempts to do so and scrubbed his eyes with his palms. “Good. I don’t.”
He spent three days in the hospital after the Sides left, and he’d been stuck pretending to be Thomas mostly on his own. It had terrified him. Although, that wasn’t exactly new.
He was grateful none of Thomas’s family recognized him. His mom came to visit after the sides left, and the rest of his family after work. They drifted in and out of the hospital, offering platitudes and comfort and dumb jokes. Part of Virgil was offended, actually, that none of Thomas’s family recognized Thomas was gone (not gone. Just not here.). But that was stupid of him. They wouldn’t think anything other than that Thomas was a little shook up from his car accident. What kind of sane person might jump to the conclusion that Thomas’s fictional characters were not fictional but actually parts of his personality, and something had forced them into their own physical forms after being expelled by the personification of rage?
Could everyone do stuff like this? Did everyone’s mind look like Thomas’s, with little mini versions of them running around and bickering? Little Joans…
No one would ever think that what was happening was happening. Of course not.
But he still worried. Shocker.
percy jackson series ..... how we feelin about this one boys
oh shit what if it turns out like riverdale
dreams-absolutely-crushed-deact
no fight with medusa percy says this n she drops dead
remember when fyre fest happened like a year or so ago and there was this article where the attendees complained about how shitty it was but there was this one middle class dude who won a ticket through like a lottery or something and had the time of his life because rich people suffering is great. i hope y’all remember it is today’s mood
god i AM josh.
I just looked at Bernies twitter and he mentioned how MLK was shot while helping sanitation workers organize a strike and people are calling him class reductionist for that lmfao
“class reductionists hate anything that they think doesn’t solve 100% of problems” Yes.
Concept: a video game that mashes up an old-school dating sim with the basic outlines of of Gawain and the Green Knight, plus a whole load of JRPG tropes.
You play as a great hero who’s recently defeated one of those blarg-behold-my-true-form boss monsters that had come to destroy the town in fulfillment of some dumb prophecy – or, at least, that’s what everybody thinks happened.
The truth is that you’re just some random schmuck, and you didn’t stand a chance. Both out of pity for how comically unprepared you were, and in recognition of the fact that you were literally the only person in town brave enough to face them, the boss monster offered to give you one year to prepare, and then they’ll come back for a rematch.
The catch?
You can’t tell anyone about the deal: if you do and the boss monster finds out, they’ll immediately destroy the town. Whatever preparations you plan to make, you’ll have to manage it without revealing why!
Gameplay primarily takes the form of a relationship-building life sim. There is, in fact, a dungeon conveniently nearby if you want to try to grind enough levels to take the boss monster in single combat, though that’s far from the only victory condition available. Of course, if you don’t satisfy any of the possible victory conditions, and the monster comes back and find you unprepared, they totally weren’t bluffing, and they’ll just shrug, kill you, and destroy the town after all – so you better get cracking!
(In keeping with the source material, one of the townspeople is, of course, the monster in disguise, and always has been. There’s a secret ending if you manage to successfully date them. This is the most difficult and obscure victory condition in the entire game, to the point of being practically impossible without using a guide.)
@damnsmartblueboxes replied:
But do they have a cool monster spouse?
Yes, the boss monster is married, but neither the monster nor their wife will rule out the possibility of a threesome if you play your cards right.
(Oddly, that part comes from the Arthurian side of our inspirational source material, not the anime dating sim side; in some versions of the traditional tale, Gawain is very strongly implied to have scored with both the Green Knight and the Green Knight’s wife!)
Concept: a video game that mashes up an old-school dating sim with the basic outlines of of Gawain and the Green Knight, plus a whole load of JRPG tropes.
You play as a great hero who’s recently defeated one of those blarg-behold-my-true-form boss monsters that had come to destroy the town in fulfillment of some dumb prophecy – or, at least, that’s what everybody thinks happened.
The truth is that you’re just some random schmuck, and you didn’t stand a chance. Both out of pity for how comically unprepared you were, and in recognition of the fact that you were literally the only person in town brave enough to face them, the boss monster offered to give you one year to prepare, and then they’ll come back for a rematch.
The catch?
You can’t tell anyone about the deal: if you do and the boss monster finds out, they’ll immediately destroy the town. Whatever preparations you plan to make, you’ll have to manage it without revealing why!
Gameplay primarily takes the form of a relationship-building life sim. There is, in fact, a dungeon conveniently nearby if you want to try to grind enough levels to take the boss monster in single combat, though that’s far from the only victory condition available. Of course, if you don’t satisfy any of the possible victory conditions, and the monster comes back and find you unprepared, they totally weren’t bluffing, and they’ll just shrug, kill you, and destroy the town after all – so you better get cracking!
(In keeping with the source material, one of the townspeople is, of course, the monster in disguise, and always has been. There’s a secret ending if you manage to successfully date them. This is the most difficult and obscure victory condition in the entire game, to the point of being practically impossible without using a guide.)
@damnsmartblueboxes replied:
But do they have a cool monster spouse?
Yes, the boss monster is married, but neither the monster nor their wife will rule out the possibility of a threesome if you play your cards right.
(Oddly, that part comes from the Arthurian side of our inspirational source material, not the anime dating sim side; in some versions of the traditional tale, Gawain is very strongly implied to have scored with both the Green Knight and the Green Knight’s wife!)
I’m sorry but Bruce Wayne and Harleen quinzel being in the same med school and they’re friends but no one (not even themselves) are sure how they get along
Batman being forced to solve a case with Harley Quinn : You’re my punishment for dropping out of med school
Harley Quinn making the connection between this edgy goth man bat and the edgy goth med student who she suffered all nighters with:
It’s even funnier the thought of them becoming unlikely friends again and teaming up for missions.
Super man: why is a convicted criminal just sitting in your living room?
Harley, sipping her tea: I was actually invited you jealous whore
bruce: ...it’s movie night. or at least it was going to be until your uncle zod decided to bring down the wrath of krypton, clark. get him a new hobby that doesn’t involve leveling cities
Harley: hey Brucie!
The rest of justice league that are only allowed to refer to him as Batman:
Bruce after BoP: None of you have ever named a hyena after me, so sit the fuck down.