New pride flag dropped
the bass guitar was one of the most sexual, sublime, and heavenly inventions by mankind
Imagine making a small talk with your barista and they slide their social battery badge down a level
OMG I bought that pin last week and it arrived today!
imagine sliding this down mid conversation lmao
In a good day I'm in yellow ngl...
You're at a lunch with friends when they all stop talking.
They were distracted by the low health sound of your social health bar
Do-do do-do do-do
I need this for... reasons.
you know what? this sort of thing should be normalized. if im talking to someone, and they feel like they need a social break, let them use this! plus it might help people who have trouble telling where they're at on that scale
BRB BOUGHT TO GO ORDER ASAP
Me too man, me too
I need this so bad
All I can picture is my wife making eye contact with me at a party and sliding it aaaassaaaaall the way down as a way of telling me she'd like to leave now.
all i can picture is my wife making eye contact as we walk towards the party and sliding it allllll the way down as a way of telling me that i am forcing her to socialize against her will and that we could be on the couch petting the dog right now
I'd want to be able to control this from a remote in my pocket. (Mentally/magically would be even better.) That way, I could have it drain away on its own during a conversation.
not enough fucked up little freak animals in the barbie movie. not enough busted ass capital-c Creatures. barbie god's™ mistakes.
where were they. greta where were they.
I refuse to let anyone forget those two cunty little dogs
nobody says “hey wise guy” or “what’s the big idea” anymore…reflects the sorry state of wisdom and big ideas in general
Out of Touch
Out of Touch Thursday
copywriteddad
OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY
but im out of my head when you’re not around…
I love automata so much!
this video is from House of Automata on Instagram, where their tags seem to indicate that the piece was made by Roullet and Decamps (active in Paris from 1865 to, incredibly, 1995). apparently his fur was destroyed by moths, and will soon be replaced
What uh. What's the frog story 👀
back when i was in second grade, my elementary school organised a school market with every class selling their crafts for charity. the contribution of my class were hand-sized ceramic frogs we made in art class. each one of us made one of them to be sold for five euros a piece (this is important later). the quality of the frog i made varies drastically based on who is telling the story, and for reasons that will become very apparent later there is no way to check, but i stand by the fact that it was average looking, if a bit wonky.
the day of the market arrived, and all frogs were bought within minutes, snatched up by enthusiastic and proud parents. all except - mine. because my mother hates spending money on unnecessary things, and she hates children's crafts even more. so she - loudly and vehemently - refused, in her thick eastern european accent, to "spend five euros on an ugly frog".
i will never forget seeing my ceramic frog alone on the slightly wet cardboard, surrounded by the imprints left behind by the already sold frogs. all the while other parents are getting more and more agitated, trying to get my mother to put the frog out of its misery. eventually, she budged, and spend five euros on a wonky frog. she was absolutely furious about this.
so furious, in fact, that when we came home to where my father was remodelling the kitchen, she WALLED IT IN. that's right. she cask of amadillo'd that poor ceramic fool. put him into the open wall and slapped concrete over it faster than my poor seven year old self or my dad could protest. out of pure anger over loosing five euros. and that's where it remains, until this day.
my mom hates when this story is brought up, which is why we bring it up all the time. she also thinks she what she did was right, because "do the other parents know where the frog is? no. only your creation is safe. because i love you." morally, i would disagree, but on a pure factual basis, she has a point.
i made her another ceramic frog for her last brithday, which was not buried like some pharaoh, and everytime guests compliment it my brother loudly goes "oh you should see the other frog he made" and when they ask to see it, he points at the wall. this is hilarious to him and infuriating for my mother. and that's the frog story.
people in the notes are strongly divided on whether this is tragic or hilarious. well let me tell you a secret. it is both. all the best stories are
star wars heritage post
*walks up to the bar* get me a white gilgamesh. and make it warm, its gonna be a long night
TWO THIRDS BEER AND ONE THIRD MILK
FROM A GOAT OR OF ITS ILK
GOES DOWN HARSH, IT ISNT GOOD
MAKES YOU FEEL YOURE MADE OF WOOD
WHITE GILGAMESH IT MAKE YOU SICK
JUST TOO FOUL, JUST TOO THICK
you guys werent supposed to actually drink this
Remember that "three items from the store to make the cashier most uncomfortable" meme? Apparently I accidentally found a winning combo tonight at the corner store, one of the usual clerks shot me a really weird look when I was checking out with these
Jimmy Budgett
Wasted away again in Meageritaville
[ID: first 6 images are composed of screencaps from lord of the rings, plus a surprise guest.
- gandalf looking scared says, “i’m so nervous…”
- dolly parton smiles and says, “it’s gonna be okay, don’t worry.”
- third image is the location shot from the return of the king title card.
- gandalf, in a haze and lying down on the ground, says, “wait, where is dolly parton?”
- behind the haze, elrond says, “who do you think gave you the big naturals?”
- gandalf’s eyes are glassy with tears of joy.
the final image is a screenshot of tumblr replies to this post.
@/thehylianbatman wrote, “all due love and respect, dolly’s bigs aren’t natural; she’ll gladly admit that time and again!”
@/alex-wtf replies by tagging the previous person and writing, “that’s because she gave her naturals to gandalf and had to replace them.”
/ end ID]
"Quivering" is my least-favourite word in the english language. Nothing and nobody should be quivering. If you're quivering right now, stop that shit immediately. Tremble or shake if you must but the quivering has to stop.
