I'm Not An Uncle

Okay I do not give a shit about this article at all but where did they get this picture of the skeleton wearing prescription pill armor

Like this is the coolest fucking thing I have seen in a while who made this

is he also in front of the white house?

He's the president

American Wildlife, a mosaic mural in the lobby of the new Cincinnati Federal Building.3 made by Charley Harper in 1964.

aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall

Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.

Well unless the mall is his native territory I think I'm fine, I wasn't planning on smiling at him

This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.

Misguided! I would much rather have a mallmate I can easily see and hear coming. I'm confident I can stay out of the gorilla's way, but if I step on a snake or one otherwise gets the jump on me, it's all over.

It's not just about the physical danger either, it's about my mental health. One gorilla, unless he's actively mad at me, I just keep a healthy distance between us and make sure I never get trapped. With the snakes, it requires a lot more constant vigilance

They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.

if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes

Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.

Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.

this is too good to leave hidden in the replies

fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard

posting Shadowrun day 3

i’m sincerely always saying this

british people call boypussy blokehole btw

These are also town names

Why is the M upside down?

Oh my God I’m a moron

This is my dad :) Here is the rest of the thread (i just said tjis in another post, but i just wanna share abt my dad)

Disney technicians repairing an animatronic figure.

Perfect

doctors repairing long asscrack john lennon

LMAOOOOO

@weirdness-is-good is this weirdness good or what?

Disney is bad. This looks like a Croenberg movie, though.. so.. that’s good.

They should burn down every single field that looks beautiful on a summers day so no young lovers can ever lay in the sunlight dreaming of each other ever again

Kobby TV Commercial #1 (1997)

Director: Takeo Hatai

Animator: Hidekazu Ohara