monday thing: april 13 (on days of unexpected weather)

do you remember that day it snowed in April?

spring was coming in, cresting green on the trees

and your coat had moved from ever-present drying out on the back of a chair

to hanging in the closet where you had to dig it out

and walked to class with your fingers wrapped around a paper cup

hot with still-steeping tea.

and someone had left the windows in the classroom open overnight

to tempt a spring breeze in and usher out the winter air.

it was so damn cold in there that morning

everyone kept their coats on throughout class

and everyone laughed about it.

oh, lord! that was a bad time

you were miserable.

that was the semester your room flooded over break

and you caught a sinus infection that just wouldn’t move along

and the family cat of eighteen-some years died in her sleep

and you were always caught somewhere between I can’t do this

and I can do this but what will it take out of me?

they say the bad things linger more in the memory

and maybe that’s true:

you have some sharp memories.

you remember the misery. you remember the peaks of it.

you remember the day you fled half-crying from class

and curled up tight in a ball on your bed like you could make yourself disappear.

but most of those days you remember as beads on a string

all tied up together

they’re only a thing because they’re a part of a thing

individually they could drop out of your hand and roll under the bed

and gather dust in the dark.

but! you remember the day you went to your first rehearsal of that play.

you came to that show late. everyone knew each other. you were nervous.

but that day you were early, came in ahead rushing through the rain

and you remember the feeling of sitting alone there in front of the stage

bare feet, socks drying

you remember the book you were reading

and the way something eased up in you as you opened it again and forgot:

–that you were waiting and nervous

–that you were new and uncertain

–that you were cold and damp–

and would have to go back out in that eventually.

everyone was cold and damp when they came in one by one

so just then you had something in common after all

and something to laugh at and complain about with the rest.

and you remember when you went back out in that

you’d never seen so much rain in your life! the sidewalks across the quad were like canals

your converse weren’t made for it. your umbrella couldn’t take it.

you all but had to swim back to your dorm

wet up past the knees and clutching your satchel under your jacket.

but it’s not a bad memory

because nothing got wet that couldn’t dry

and in the end you had to laugh.

what the hell, huh! what the hell was that.

oh, you remember the bits that hurt alright

but it always takes time to see where it all leads out to

what scrapes made you laugh

(check out this bruise I got falling in the art building! jesus those stairs are hard)

and what healed alright

(well it hurt like fuck when that jar fell out of the fridge

had a black spot on my nail for months! but it did work its way out eventually)

and what you were willing to take because it led out of something

(got a hell of a cold out of that snow day but I hadn’t been sledding in ages!

we drank cocoa afterward, my hands were so cold, I’d do it all over again)

or led to something

(god, my throat! I think I swallowed a gallon of water–I was so scared–

–but damn if I didn’t just pass my swim test)

something worthwhile.

and–

what didn’t.

what didn’t hurt so much at the time

but set in you like a crooked bone, and now aches in bad weather?

(the way those counselors talked to me–

–about me–to me–)

and what did hurt, so much

but looking back now it’s all just part of a pattern

and you couldn’t even pick the piece of it out?

(…)

and what wasn’t worth it in the end

all the hurt you were willing to swallow

hoping it would come to mean something.

what hurt do you cough up even now sometimes

standing in the shower, lying awake, thinking

when could I have stopped?

they told me there was a point to all this!

well, it takes time and it takes time

and it’s still taking time

and all you know is you don’t know

how things will look when it’s all behind you.

when this is all over

(is anything ever really over?)

what of it will stand out to you?

what will be the sharp parts?

what will you point to and say yes–that was worth it–

and what becomes nothing more than another bead on a string

another day lost in the calendar

another part of the background

the given circumstances

of this slice of your history?

and against that background, what things too small even to see at the time

will stand out later

with light shining through

like snow in April?

The Auction

A dystopian tale of the “New Americas,” where the divide between the wealthy and… everyone else is too great to cross. But with all the other viruses comes one that lies dormant in the genes, activating at birth and it is inevitably fatal. So now, perfect genetics are the most desired thing in a mate. Even if you have to buy one.

Important note: there are discussions of disabilities in this chapter viewed by the assholes in this dystopian tales as ‘adverse elements.’ Since my twin boys have autism, I know this is bullshit. Please keep in mind that any discussion of the differently-abled is only for the purpose of the story and their negative responses are pathetic and uneducated.

You’ll be seeing Rich Asshole Ransom Drysdale at the auction tonight, along with James Buchanan Barnes and Terrifying But So Good in a Suit Loki. All obscenely rich bastards. All looking for a wife.

Chapter One - This Can’t Be Happening

“This can’t be happening.”

The woman weeping softly to the right of Rowan might be a little older than she was, but it’s clear she had no frame of reference for what was about to happen to her.

“Stop, don’t mess up your makeup,” Rowan whispered, trying to wipe away the mascara streaming down the woman’s wet cheeks. “Look, it’ll be…”

It’ll be okay?

Was she really about to say something as stupid as that? The group of overly made-up captives - including Rowan, the crying woman clutching her hand, and the twelve other young women shivering in sheer dresses - were most definitely not going to be okay.

Keep reading

👀👀👀 damn! What a scary thought tonput yourself on auction because of your top tier genetics.

And Rowans reasons for all this hurts because she knows what a great person her brother is. There blunt disregard for even treating him like a person when discussing him makes me furious. I was applauding Rowan for her outburst. ❤

Jensen Ackles | Men's Health, July 20, 2022

menshealth.com

(via)

Y’all, I’m over here DYING cuz Google suggested me this article about the crisis of backyard chicken keepers– which is that they love having chickens so much that they keep getting more, and then don’t know what to do with all the eggs.

Which I can see how this would be a problem, but it’s just so funny to me because they had interviewed this one guy who started off with 3 chickens, and then kept adding more and more, and eventually started donating the eggs to a local food bank, and at the end of the year when they wrote him a tax receipt, he discovered he’d donated over 400 dozen eggs.

Seriously, it was a whole article talking very seriously about how people are so into chickens that they just keep collecting them like pokemon and then have to “scramble” (their words not mine) to get rid of the eggs, because they weren’t even thinking of egg production, they just loved having chickens.

And while I may be over here laughing a bit too hard, honestly? Big Mood.

“but without the profit motive people won’t work”

If this is you:

Dinosaur Anti-Capitalism

‘Papillons’ Illustrations for ‘Le Larousse pour tous’ by Adolphe Millot (1857–1921).

https://archive.org/details/lelaroussepourto01laro/mode/2up?view=theater

Wikimedia. 

I'm always fascinated by insects that have ridiculously large mandibles, so I wanted to draw a bunch of them all at once!

This Spanish moon moth is flaunting his good looks in the handful of days he has left to live. Unable to eat after emerging from his cocoon, the adult devotes all of his remaining time and energy to reproduction.

Image credit: Daniel Morel

Golden advice!

not to sound like a medieval peasant or a catholic but i resent anti-carb propaganda so much like bread will never be evil it is holy it is divine it is one of life’s most simple yet decadent pleasures. love is stored in the bread

My perfect mashed potatoes

The secret is in the water; literally, it’s IN the water.

See, when you boil potatoes, a lot of special starches and sugars and stuff leeches out into the water. When you drain the water before mashing them, you throw away a lot of good stuff, which is a big part of what makes mashed potatoes “dry” and bland, even when you add large amounts of cream and butter and things.

So don’t throw out any water.

Here’s how you do that:

First, cut your potatoes into smaller cubes than you probably do. (I’ve left the skins on for flavor and also, that’s where a lot of a potato’s nutrients are, like protien and iron and vitamins B and C, just to name a few)

The reason for cutting them smaller (besides avoiding giant peices of skin) is so that there is less space in the pot between each peice for water to fill, so you use less water to cook them. That’s important because you won’t be draining any water, so you can’t afford to have too much water! For the same reason, just barely cover them with water when they go on the stove.

But! Before you do that, put the pot on the stove with some butter, garlic, and seasonings; let the butter start to sizxle just a little then put most of a single layer of potatoes in the pan and let the brown and sear. Turn them, brown them on all sides, get ‘em fairly dark (I forgot to get a pic here because I was worried I’d burn the butter).

Ready? now throw the rest of the potatoes in right on top, and add your water, give them a stir. This way, you’re boiling in some of that lovely fried potato/french fry flavor.

Okay, so, as they cook, you may need to add a little water, not too much! ideally the very highest piece of potato will be poking just above the surface. Now, when your potatoes are really really soft, mash them directly into the water. Just pull them off the stove, leave all the water in, and start mashing. Trust me. At first you’ll think there’s too much water. If you get them mashed and they ARE a little too liquidy, just put ‘em back on the stove. You’ll have to stir often or constantly, but they will steam off additional water without losing any good stuff.

Now add some salt, and taste. Right?! And you haven’t even put in any cream or cheese or anything yet.

Speaking of which, you can use like, a third of the amount of butter or cream or anything, and they will still taste better than usual. So they taste better AND they are higher in nutrients AND lower in fats and salts! That’s a lot of win — enjoy your potatoes!

Fuck Columbus! Indigenous Rights! And happy Thanksgiving!

lol this got on the tumblr radar again, got like another thousand notes in the last little while... all the stuff I write and make, all the time I invested getting out of my 20+ year restaurant career, and this is what tumblr likes from me lmao

Must try this...

My hypothesis is that in like 10 years gen z is gonna have a big cult boom the way the boomers did in the 70s

It’s already happening on tik tok. There’s a fun new thing going round that’s citing common symptoms of depression and anxiety as signs you’re about to have your awakening and that you are actually an alien and the reason you don’t feel right is because you’re home sick for your own galaxy. So that’s fun.

agreed, and i don’t mean this in a “haha gen z is so dumb they’re gonna join a tiktok cult lmao” i mean that conditions are perfect for the formation of cults right now.

So if that’s the case everyone remember with me the cardinal rules of not getting cult’d

SOCIAL BUFFER: Learn what healthy social boundaries are and develop relationships which are within those boundaries.

Be wary of those who step on your or others’ boundaries. Be there for your friends, but don’t be their therapists or parents. Go get coffee or juice or snacks & chat casually with a friendly crew on a regular basis.

ESTEEM BUFFER. Recognize that you and every other person on this planet are owed a baseline of respect.

Respect means that what you wear, what/who you take interest in, and who/what you are are things which you decide on based on your own reasoning. If anyone is trying to change your mind, make sure to think critically about their side and decide for yourself whether you want to change. Ask: Why do they want you to change? Is that valid to your situation? Who / what would benefit from this change? Do you want them / it to benefit? Then decide for yourself.

RELAXATION BUFFER. Take time exclusively for yourself.

Take care of your body and mind when it needs to be fed, watered, washed, or nurtured. Have a couple hobbies that are just for you. Have more than one interest. Think about more than just one topic. Cults keep you focused on them to the exclusion of all else, so don’t allow yourself to be blocked in.

BUBBLE POP BUFFER: Learn from multiple sources, even ones you don’t like or respect.

Read multiple sources’ versions of events before you decide what you feel about something. Recognize that not all sources are valid, but understand what those invalid sources are trying to do. Are they misguided or malicious? Who are THEIR sources? What is the agenda? Who benefits? Why would they want to say what they’re saying? Do they have a point? Who pays them? What do they care about? Then make your decision.

BEWARE THE B.I.T.E.: Cults control people via Behavior, Information, Thought, and Emotion control. BITE

Look up the BITE model and consider it against groups you wish to join / have joined.

Remember. You are the arbiter of your mind.

You have the blessing and burden of making your own decisions. Other people who will love and care about you throughout your life will want you to think for yourself and will think for themselves.

You are not alone. You are worthwhile. Your thoughts are your own and you have every right to control them yourself.

Just a quick addition: look for BITE stuff in regular individuals and friend groups, not just groups you’re formally joining. Look for it in roommates. Look for it in anyone you start getting close to. Look for it in groups that people you care about are getting into, and people they’re getting close to.

Sometimes people are just flawed, sometimes they’re well-intentioned but still growing, but that’s the point of red flags: they aren’t a sure sign of trouble, but they’re still worth taking note of & keep an eye on in case patterns emerge.

The reason I say this is worth learning and looking out for in more casual relationships is that these are mostly just abuse tactics carried out in a large-scale, more organized way. And because if someone is interested in recruiting you, they may employ these tactics on an individual, casual-seeming level as well.

(Information on BITE methods)

As someone who’s really interested in cults and cult tactics, I really recommend “The Vow”, too! NXIVM is a cult that essentially set itself up as a self-improvement business tool for white collar folks, and it used “wellness” culture as a major recruitment tool. There was nothing remotely religious or spiritual about it, which is part of why so many people fell into it. “Seduced” is good as well, and shorter.

Another tip, as an ex-cult member. Don’t join a cult* for shits and giggles. That’s how I got recruited into the cult I was in, and I was so deep I was going to either be kidnapped or become homeless because someone in the cult told me it was my only option. As rational of a person as you think you are, cults are cognitohazards. It’s easy to see something as a cult when being displayed from the outside, but it’s much harder when you’re actively being manipulated by cult leaders and fellow members.

*By cult I’m also including cult-like groups: MLMs, exclusionist tumblr circles, that therapist who’s running a scam in your name and living in your house, listeners of infowars, etc.

jake is neither buff, stupid or kind enough to be a himbo

this is my hot take

counter point:

he saw a girl being harassed and didn’t even hesitate to attack her harasser even though he should’ve known he’d get his ass kicked

“we need to stop the stigma towards drug users and addicts” and “we need to challenge the idea that being sober makes you boring” and “we need to stop acting like binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage is fun and normal for young people” are all ideas that can and should coexist.

just so we’re clear, the threshold for “binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage” is waaaay lower than you think.

I work in an obstetrician and gynaecologist’s office. we have to tell patients on a regular basis that they are binge drinking weekly when they think they are simply consuming a normal amount of alcohol on the weekends.

having more than 3 drinks in a single sitting if you have an estrogen based endocrine system is a binge that is medically significant.

having more than 5 in a sitting is a medically significant binge for someone with a testosterone based endocrine system.

every time you do this, it significantly impacts your risk of getting breast cancer, and damages your liver. it takes time to recover from that liver damage. if you’re having a 3-5 or more drink binge on a weekly basis, you are an alcoholic, medically speaking, and your liver is not recovering.

again: the bar for what binge drinking is, medically, is so much lower than what you think it is.

alcohol is a really toxic substance and not something you should fuck around with.

again: if you have an estrogenized hormone system (common for most women), then 3 drinks is a binge. if you have a testosteronized hormone system (common for most men), then 5 drinks is a binge.

anything above that number, consumed as frequently as weekly or more, and you’re medically a binge drinking alcoholic.

also, if you’re drinking any quantity of alcohol 6 days a week or more, that’s another threshold at which, medically speaking, you meet the definition of alcoholism. your liver needs more days without alcohol in your system than just one a week to recover and be healthy.

I don’t say any of this to shame anyone—to me, alcoholism or substance use disorders aren’t a sign of weakness or moral failing. and most of us genuinely don’t know this stuff.

rather—I point this out because it’s important to reduce harm, and find ways to live healthier, happier lives. there is a life outside of constant binge drinking. it’s not always easy to find it. but it’s out there. you deserve a life where your emotional needs are met by something other than alcohol, and a life in which your liver is healthy, and the ways you cope and celebrate and find joy don’t put you at increased risk of cancer.

also–even if alcohol is the only way you can self-medicate, or if you choose to go on with your alcohol usage anyway regardless of other options–you still deserve to know what it’s doing to your body.

information is key. you don’t have to stop drinking, but the utter lack of education on alcohol + the normalization of binge drinking in current society leads to many people drinking without any idea of what it’s doing to their bodies.

addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it. for some people, losing liver function is worth the benefits they get from binge drinking, but they can’t make that choice if they don’t know what the consequences are to begin with.

addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it.

Let there be ease.

Let there be ease.

Let there be ease.

I pray that all who see this, receive this prayer into her heart and spirit. I pray for ease. I pray that every step in this next period is one of ease. I pray that hardships are easily overcome, that rest is abundant, that peace lives within their spirit. We have carried so much for so long and now is a time to put it down, to rest, to be, to breathe. Great Spirit, let us breathe. Allow ease to come into our lives. Let us receive it without fear or guilt.

Let it be so.

Amen & asé

How to win a play-fight when your sub is physically stronger than you:

oh my god two words in that just UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE

All hope is lost so quickly I can’t stop laughing.

danish tv is the best thing ever

“Okay :(”

He went straight to Acceptance. He didn’t even go through the five stages of grief. He just started at Acceptance.