Welcome back to Whumpcember!

Or if you're new, welcome!

This is the second ever Whumpcember event and I am happy to be running it again! I am so thankful for all the support for last year's Whumpcember and for everyone who filled out the prompt list form! I hope everyone has a wonderful writing Whumpcember, and now, onto the rules!

At the end of the month a masterpost will go out to all participants and a badge you can save stating that you are either a participant or completionist. In order to be on the masterpost though, you will have to fill out a google form at the end of month; don't worry it'll take two minutes!

If you have any more questions, send me an ask, but please read the FAQ first!

Written Prompt list below:

In their cottage there will be pictures of them taken over all these years because Aziraphale will steal them from Heaven like thanks for the photoshoot I’m going to decorate the house with these.

Literally

Actually, Aziraphale’s whole plan to become the Supreme Archangel was an elaborate scheme to steal back the evidence of his and Crowley’s crimes against celestial and infernal hierarchies alike to proudly display in their very own cottage that he intended to surprise Crowley with. Unfortunately, Crowley did not get the memo that really Aziraphale was asking for his assistance in his Heavenly heist and the results was tragic. 

So many crack theories for the end of S2 and not one of you has put forth the obvious Bentley-Aziraphale body swap option. The car is now the Supreme Archangel of Heaven and Aziraphale is getting ridden low and slow through the closing credits. And here I thought this was a smart fandom... *shakes head*

The thing is, Neil could absolutely make this work.

See, you think initially that this is completely ridiculous. Then you step back and realize that the entire plot of series one and the original was misplacing the antichrist and Armageddon being avoided because an eleven year old just said “nu-uh”.

TW/CW: Jokes about kidnapping, molestation, murder, paedophilia and homelessness in relation to OCD intrusive thoughts and OCD thought patterns.

Autism: I need to have a plan.

ADHD: Throw out the plan!

OCD: We have no plan! We’re gonna get kidnapped! Molested! Murdered! We look twelve! Paedophiles like twelve year olds!

ADHD: Ooh! I like that shirt.

Autism: We didn’t come here to clothes shop. Get it when we’re here to clothes shop.

OCD: If we don’t get that shirt now we’ll never see it again.

ADHD: I bought it.

Autism: WHY CAN’T YOU TWO JUST STICK TO THE PLAN!?!?

ADHD: BECAUSE PLANS SUCK AND ARE EASILY FORGETTABLE!!!

OCD: You’re just a bad person who can’t get their life together. You’ll probably end up homeless on the street begging for food and you’ll die of dehydration.

ADHD: Eat right now! I see Potato Corner!

Autism: Oh! Stimmy foods!

OCD: What if we choke on a chip and die? Or the flavour dust? What if these chips are the only bad batch they’ve ever made and they’re a bad sensation?

Autism: Stop! You’re freaking me out.

ADHD: I bought chips.

Autism: Who have you the money!

OCD: Did we actually buy the chips? Check the chips are real, just in case we imagined it.

ADHD: I can taste them, they’re real.

OCD: What if because of my poor impulse control I loose all my money and then end up broke and homeless?

ADHD: Time to space out.

Autism: I’m just gonna go into every shop and think about if characters from my special interest would buy them.

OCD: Don’t buy anything unless you want to be homeless.

ADHD: Buy everything.

adding the entire userbase to a big discord server named 'tumblr 2.0' to solve no problems whatsoever and invent several new ones

This is me♡♡

Please do this for your cats.

Dispite their reputation, cats are very very socal creatures. Cats do the equivalent of this for you when they sit in front of your laptop and put their arms on the keyboard or put their paw on your phone while you're using it. This is their love language, it's how they show that they like you and care about what you care about. They don't understand why you care about it but they're trying.

If you turn around and do the same for them they'll be absolutely delighted. Sometimes when our youngest cat goes to the scratching post I scratch it with him too and he loves it. He'll gets so into the scratching that he ends up climbing it cuz he wants to scratch with his back paws too. If they're chirping at the window I'll sometimes go over to see what they see and they usually scoot over so I have room beside them to see the offending bird or insect and they'll purr like crazy cuz they're so happy I'm helping them

cats'ove language is quality time

I’ve seen people get their cats their own fake phone or keyboards to paw at . The cats are immensely pleased with this offering AND the human can work on their own thing uninterrupted.

I wonder, if someone actually bothered to ask the Bentley what it wanted to play on the radio, instead of telling it what to play, what would play?

I already play what I want

FREDDIE MERCURY

EVERYTIME

Not me reblogging this saying nearly the exact same thing about Queen and The Velvet Underground only to scroll down and find that the Bentley herself already confirmed this. 🤣

I wonder, if someone actually bothered to ask the Bentley what it wanted to play on the radio, instead of telling it what to play, what would play?

Queen, actually. Crowley likes a wide range of music but it canonically all turns to Queen if left in the Bentley. So the Bentley is really the Queen fan, not Crowley who actually thinks Queen is pretty cool but prefers the Velvet Underground.

I am screaming look at these photos

Cut scene of Crowley sleeping on a WALL in his PAJAMAS (HE WEARS PAJAMAS ((AND BLACK SILK ONES AT THAT)))

(From the Script book) He DOES wake up a mess and he DOES clean up instantly (WE WERE ROBBED OF MESSY HAIR CROWLEY)

CONCEPT ART FOR CROWLEYS BEDROOM

I CANT

In so many universes that bed has seen so many unspeakable things.

I love that Aziraphale perceives Crowley as much cooler than he actually is (because he's completely in love with him).

It's obvious from the body swap scene -which served him well because Crowley does play it cooler in Hell- but my personal favorite is this:

"Jane Austen - the brains behind the 1810 Clarkenwell diamond robbery."

Aziraphale was initially dumbfounded when Crowley knew Jane Austen from the robbery instead of the books she wrote, and he saw how confused Crowley was when he found out that she was an author.

So he thought, if Crowley doesn't know about the fact that she's an author and he knows about the robbery, then this must be the known thing about her that people will recognize her from. And when Nina and Maggie asked "Jane Austen?" he responded with Crowley's fact rather than his.

(It was also very autistic of him to try and copy his "cooler" husband's sayings so that people don't view him as weird)

imagine you as a child, rummaging around in the current version of your room. what would they be drawn to?

The snakes 🐍 ❤️

going to halloween party as crowley, if anyone says "but you don't have an aziraphale!" i'll say yeah neither does crowley

I already regret making this post, but I think this needs to be a real discussion.

** Please note: I 100% do NOT want goyische opinions on this post. I am not interested, they are not helpful, and I will block you without hesitation even if we've been mutuals forever **

I think we have reached the level of Holocaust inversion on the left that we actually need to recalibrate the entire way we engage with an alarming amount of leftist goyim, because they have decided that their twisted understanding of Zionism as a form of 'apartheid genocidal ethnonationalist fascism' is on the same level as the Nazis.

Now regardless of how that makes you, as a Jew feel, that is how a lot of them are viewing this, period.

That means that you should assume that every single "we punch Nazis, not debate them" anti-fascist principle out there can be applied in full force to Zionists [with the understanding that their definition of Zionist usually means every Jew they don't like or agree with or who doesn't perform their brand of politics to the level they are asking]

Remember that video of an actual, real elderly Nazi that just croaks in the middle of his hateful yelling that went viral? Remember how happy people were when Richard Spencer got punched? Remember the whole "the only good Nazi is a dead Nazi" slogan? That whole idea that you cannot debate white supremacists and fascists because that inherently means debating your humanity and makes their position seem valid enough to debate?

Yeah. For these people, all of that applies to Zionists [and whoever they decide to label as such]

So yeah, an older guy protesting got killed? Same reaction as yelling Nazi dude above. Shrug.

A brutal massacre of Israelis and their neighbors that wiped out 1400 men, women and children? Imagine that some group managed to do that to 1400 Nazi families. We might find the sadistic nature of the deaths distasteful, but really: how many tears are you shedding?

Civilian population centers of primarily Jews are under constant missile shelling and bomb threats? Imagine that we were talking about Nazi Germany instead. Sucks for them I guess, right? 🤷‍♀️

Their reactions to recent events ranging from silent apathy to outright glee all make sense once you play a Mad Libs game of filling in "Zionist" or "Israeli" in place of "Nazi" or "fascist" in every "punch Nazis!!!1!" slogan.

The fact that Jews are and have been frequently the targets of these fascist groups throughout history and were the primary targets of the Nazis is irrelevant. The fact that we are human people who just want to practice our ancient religion and culture in peace is irrelevant. The bottom line is that the far goyische left has now figured out a way to fully de-person Jews in a social justice approved way, without even the ability to point out how utterly unhinged and counterfactual that take is because "we don't debate Nazis."

I don't know how to fix this.

Genuinely, I don't.

It's like the spirits of their pogrom-loving ancestors have gripped them and instead of whispering "the Jews killed Jesus, poison wells, and thirst for the blood of children," they just substitute out Jesus for Palestine.

Technically, we never see them wear the "turtleneck" without the jacket, and the fact that NO ONE in this fandom has proposed this idea is unacceptable

Open back too. All or nothing, slutty demon.