omg

if i got to ask a genie for a wish i wouldn’t just ask for money i would specifically ask for all of jeff bezos’ money and then use all his money to do all the things people keep saying jeff bezos could do with his money

pros of this plan:

cons of this plan:

THE CAT SASSED HER BACK. NO I’M NOT MOMMMMM

meowed on ig

reblog if you’re not afraid to have a picture of god in your blog

I almost scrolled past this but Shaggy possessed me briefly and that near-death experience was enough to convince me to reblog

When the whole squad looks good

Unmute !

Mood

lmaooooo

Asked for a scoop of vanilla, cold stone delivers

His face before he slams it

wher ethe fuck the ice cream go

He destroyed it

Gratitude - Tidying Up With Marie Kondo (2019)

A gentle genius

*white parent voice* i cant believe kanye and kim named their baby North West!! thats ridiculous!! oh no, its almost 4:30, i need to pick up my kids Mackaylikiah and Ashleighyie from their water polo practice!

I always reblog this post so fucking fast every time it comes on my dash my phone shuts down the tumblr app and reboots

McKarty 64 is my favorite Mario Kart game.

My favorite part is that the blog post the photo was taken from detailed this mother’s decision-making process and chose this name because her husband saw it on a road sign on the way home

She named her daughter after a road sign

a road sign

there was a girl at my school called “zona” cause he parents went on holiday to spain and saw it and thought it was a nice name. IT LITERALLY MEANS ZONE

“47 month old”

this is my four year old rayman origins

“Who’s doing your surgery?”

“Dr. Rayman Origins.”

THE APP REBOOTED FOR ME!!

i met a kid once whose name was “Ryce” and his mum said it was pronounced “Reese”

the best part is she was originally going to spell it “Rice”

My auntie knows a family who decided to name their daughter Owen, but they spelled it “Oin” and they made her middle name the first sound that her big sister made which happened to be “Oogok”. her name is literally “Oin Oogok Puscus”

Oin Oogok Puscus is my favorite dwarf from the Hobbit

Yo I work at a rec center in a rich neighborhood and these are some real names of white children:

Salter Tryge (pronounced Trig) Loots Pocket Aughyst (pronounced August) Taileigh Lotiss Leviathin (yes spelled like that) Bacchus Daniyal (a girl, pronounced like Daniel)

All real

This shit is hilarious

@kaiiwooo

I can’t

47 month old.

Nayvie….. Bish whet????

this is from my kid’s valentine’s list this year like this corny fake unique name thing is no joke yall this is all of the boy names 

47 month old.

I refuse to go on knowing someone named their child “Salter” I’m so done ✌🏿️

Treyton lls, I’m dying…

I know a person from college who’s name is literally “Smile”, l can’t even explain how ridiculous that is…

47 month old

47 month old

Damn suburban moms love to put unnecessary “Y’s” in names.

<b>47 month old<b/>

47 month old.

Somebody named their kid Pocket?!?!???

I am cry wheeze laughing at this post, and then when I got to the bottom I had apparently already hearted it at some point in its life?

Anyway, bless little Christopher’s parents. My god.

47 month old tho

One of the classes I subbed in had a kid named Glarison. I’m sorry, did you misspell Garrison?????

OMG IT IS BACK! I CAN FINALLY POST THE ASK I GOT ABPUT THIS!

I went to college and took religious studies courses with a girl named Storm Pagan. She never understood why I found that both funny and oddly appropriate, and I never felt like taking the time to explain.

for the love of your future children, look up what a name means in all languages before you saddle you kid with it until they’re old enough to legally change it.

I took latin in middle school. I don’t actually remember much now, but i’m telling you, it was IMPOSSIBLE to look this girl I knew in passing in the eye because her name was Latrina. 

Latrina.

(For those of you who have no idea why this is unfortunate and hilarious, ‘latrina’ is one of the latin words for toilet)

What the fuck that even sounds like ‘Latrine’ like who looked at that name and went ‘what could possibly go wrong’

Kids I actually went to school with: Nipponia (Her parents were really enthusiastic about Japan and thought no one would know.) Foreverina  Twins – Heavyn-Leigh and Eterni-Teigh Khayrliy (Carly) MyckEnziey (yes, spelled like that.) Every last one of them was white n blonde.

Naming your kids after gods seems like s BAD PLAN whether you believe in them or not. Especially Odin and Bacchus.

4 7 M O N T H O L D

I knew I pair of sisters named Chardonnae and Breane (nicknamed Brie). Fucking wine and cheese

Heavyn-Leigh and Eterni-Teigh ……. I???……what the fuck 😂😂😂

47 month old

Congrats to you for getting throught this post

Now I’m so fucking glad I’m named megan

“It’s spelled MVIIIGAN”

47 MONTH OLD

this is still the most terrifying aspect of yank culture

No mentions of

Tarique

Lashonda

Laquisha

D'Asia

Trayvon

Shaniqua

Where are all these weird ass rich people? I grew up and went to school with most people richer and whiter than a cheesecake and most had normal ass names.

I’m guessing it’s a coastal thing.

Smells west coast

Actually smells east coast or southern 😂

Somewhere not New England/New York metro area that’s for sure.

Bacchus is a really old name and one of the names of the greatest person in the universe ever, but I’m biased.

Also, some “weird” names are good, some are silly but that’s okay, and some are outright stupid. I’ve known a few people with “weird” names and most of the time you just kind of get used to it and stop thinking it’s weird - like when it’s like Flower or something. Some place names can work so being “named after a road sign” might not necessarily be bad per say. Shit like Latrina is a crime against language itself though. And Roman numerals omfg.

Names are fake though and it’s cool to call yourself whatever you want, like you can change your name to whatever as an adult and I don’t care, but maybe be a bit more thoughtful about naming your kids.

You need.. you need to unmute…

I’ve waited too long to find this gem again!

This is perfection 😂

When someone uses an abbreviation and I have to look it up

the fucking slapping noise is incredible

This is unsettling.

1-800-R-U-SLAPPIN

A round of applause