This is literally my favorite tweet of all time. It’s so powerful.
She Freaken Forgor Me
"honeymoon phase" i am literally healthily insane and obsessed for the entire duration of the relationship. skill issue
Community Label: Mature
A cropped little peek at some nsfw Kraken!Ed art I did a while back! Full version here
Community Label: Mature
Sexual themes
two (2) people asked how i did the matchbook thing so take this
this is just a simple idea but if you spend some more time you can get real krazy with it:
making fake prints is so fun please do it immediately free resources under cut xoxo
i went to the library and theg all knew you and they liked you and it was nice
Since y'all seemed to like scrungly cat face Zelda noodle for some reason, I bestow this upon you.
Some character designs with some…atypical color choices? I guess. I don’t know what’s going on in that area.
This is Nimona and her supervillain friend (He doesn’t have a name yet, I’m working on that). Nimona is his sidekick/squire, they’re like the Batman and Robin of slightly Medieval villains, but she’s actually way more evil than him. He does what he does to make a point, and he doesn’t really want anyone get hurt - Nimona just gets a kick out of destroying stuff.
I’m going to attempt to make a two page comic with them? We’ll see how this goes.
This was tagged #homework and posted in December 2011.
please look at this picture junji ito drew of his moms crusty white dog
You know what baffles me? Why did we never get a time-loop episode of Merlin? Like someone curses Camelot to be trapped in the same day and Merlin is the only one to retain memories between resets. It would be hilarious to see Merlin just go feral and use magic with wild abandon in the open cause no one will remember anyway. I wanna see him do the bit where he needs to convince Gauis that they are in a time-loop by telling him all the weird and improbable thing that will happen as they are happening. Like it would also be the perfect way to get in multiple "magic reveals" ™. Arthur could sometimes take it well or sometimes even react poorly with the promise of deciding Merlin's fate the next morning but that morning never comes so we never get a for sure answer about how he feels which is why Merlin still doesn't do a reveal post time-loop escape. Like the comedy and drama potential we missed out on man...
immortality through not being incapable of death but by coming back to life after you die no matter what is such a cool power like it’s just so fucking metal. you can rip me apart if you want, i’ll rise from my own viscera and all you’ll have done is piss me off
Come on founder/king of Athens, aren’t u gonna slay the Bull of Minos or not?
Huh...
Huh...
cinnamon-rell-deactivated202204
ART FIGHT: Part 9! Ellen Shepherd for @milkybishop Art is mine, characters belong to their owners! I do commissions!
i love having friends with favorite colors & shit so i can just send them random crap like yess this is pink ill show it to the pink friend this has a fish ill show it to the fish friend. fish is a color btw
never getting over how genuinely distressed tai lung looks when po does his shuffling trick. mid fight this man stops and panics because he cant figure out a childrens magic trick
• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony
- Jill Thomas Doyle
A zeugma walked into a bar, my life and trouble.
"Hi y'all, it's Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, here with another taste test. I'm here in 1976, and I'm gonna get some fries from Mickey D's before they changed the recipe, and then I'm gonna take 'em back to 2022, and get fries from the same McDonald's, so I can compare. Now, I've got my Nixon, uh, Ford? Carter? Era fries right here, so now I'm gonna"
*everything appears stretched and distant, and then the camera flies through space, through the sun, over millions of different Earths, past the faces of individual people in a thousand different timelines, splintered day by day, the long-dead alive once more, their varied futures lying before them. They appear to be screaming*
"annnnnd here we are, gettin' the new fries, today. I have to say, I like the old fries a bit better, bit more crisp, but Mickey D's fries are still Mickey D's fries, y'know? Anyway, I know some of you guys were freaked out at all the screaming time faces last video, but like, I'm used to 'em, and they aren't even audible to me? But y'know what is audible? That's right - Audible, use code -"
"Hi y'all, it’s Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, here to respond to some allegations."
"Lots of you are saying, Chronomaster42, why don't you stop World War II? And I keep saying that I can't change history. History's got, like, antibodies, and these haters eject me back to my time if I do anything that'll change anything. Like the space time con...tainium doesn't want me traveling around time."
"And before you start bringing up that guy who erased...France? The fuck is France? From ever existing, that wasn't me, you guys. Get your facts straight. That was @true_chronomaster, the only TikToker with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space. i have nothing to do with the Evil Leaper Challenge. I don't have a shadow self. But y'know what I do have? Some words from our sponsor, Raid: Shadow Legends -"
"Hi y'all, it's Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and today I'm gonna be doing the challenge Gamer_Springtrap2011 gave me, where I'm travelin' back in time to finally figure out which religion is true, and then I'm gonna make a tier list so we can put all this drama about which religion's the right one behind us and just settle on one of 'em that's the best. Like, finally, you know?"
"But before we go back in time to see if Adam and Eve was real, we've gotta check in with our sponsor, Adam and Eve, discreet packaging and shipping -"
"Hi y'all, it's Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, still sorry to every world religion, though like, you should really be mad at Gamer_Springtrap2011 for trolling me so hard. I got trolled guys. I'm sorry for my video 'CHALLENGE: I get this guy sitting under a tree in India to break his concentration'. I'm sorry for my video 'WHOA: I told a Roman cop where a guy was and got THIRTY SILVER COINS?!?!?' and shout out to Judas for catching my strays. Like, guys, I'm sorry. You should be mad at Gamer_Springtrap2011 though."
"Anyways, I've got this cool new money-making opportunity in the past. So like, what if we take things from the past, and sell them now? I found this guy with all this metal in his house, and it turns out nowadays they'll pay a lot for it 'cause normally you can only get copper from people stealing wire to pay for meth, but this is really good, honest copper. But like, I've gotta preserve history and shit, so I've been taking his copper and replacin' it with painted rocks. I think people are realizing 'cause every time I go to his house the copper guy's real mad and carrying stone tablets, it's funny. That Earnie Sir guy may be selling bad metal, but if you want real metal to hang on your walls, check out our sponsor Displate -"
"Hi y'all, it's TimeController73, the one EbaumsTuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and I uh, think I might have messed up the continuum a bit. I'm gonna take some time to fix it, but you know who will have the movie you want to stream right now? Today's sponsor, Blockbuster+..."
"Hello y'all, it's ChronoMaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and we've gotta talk about something important. Earlier this month I asked to ride that submersible down to the Titanic. They said no 'cause I didn't have enough money. So, like, I thought, man, you can control time and space! Go back to the real thing."
"But thing is, I got back there, right, and I was hopin' I could push Leo back on that raft 'cause the two of them could totally fit, CinemaSins had the real shit on that, but get this: he wasn't even there? Like, the two of them aren't even real? I looked all over the Titanic for 'em and I ended up falling from the ship when it broke in half so I made a portal under me, and it's kind of scary that I could have died on the Titanic and not been able to make content anymore. If I died in 1912 and didn't have new videos the algorithm would deprioritize me, y'know? It's so scary to think about. And like, I know I said the screaming faces of everyone's potential futures didn't get to me but man, they kinda get to you when there's also a lot of people screaming in the water."
"When I got back to 2023 I had two boxes on my doorstep. One was unmarked and just had a note in it saying 'THEY ARE COMING. THE RECKONING IS NEAR. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE, AND THE ANTIBODIES GROW. YES, THEY DO GROW, AND THEY HUNGER.' And I'm kinda hungry too, 'cause I didn't eat on the Titanic, so it's good that the other was my first meal kit from today's sponsor, Hello Fresh..."
“Hi, y’all, it’s ChronoMaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and I’ve got some exciting news. I’m gonna be collabing with Mr. Beast on a new challenge video where we, like, go back in time and try to survive for seven days. It’s gonna be cool as hell. We wanted to go back to Imperial China, but Mr. Beast said he was afraid we might not be respectful enough to the Emperor and thus would commit 大不敬, one of the Ten Abominations, and due to our non-noble status, we wouldn’t be able to rely on the “八議” or ‘Eight Deliberations’. Which, like, fair ‘nough. So we settled on our backup plan, which is a lot safer: France in 1916! Man, I can’t wait to see the Eiffel Tower before it got all old stuff and like, we’re gonna see it! Stay tuned, guys!”
*deep breath*
“Hello, you all. It’s ChronoMaster42, and normally I’m the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space. But today...I’m the only Youtuber who’s sorry they got Mr. Beast exploded.”
“I am. I know everyone’s canceling me, they’re canceling everyone just cause – it was his idea to go back to the Western Front anyway, and…”
*sigh*
“I’m sorry. I understand how upset you all are at the exploding of Mr. Beast. I want to apologize to the internet and to the whole Chrono crew, ‘cause I know I, uh, *stares into the camera* have changed a lot as a human being, and I’m disappointed in myself more than I’m disappointed in...myself, for going too far? Man, I don’t know what I can do to make it right.”
“I’ve been reflecting. I mean. Reflecting and I’m sorry and like, I understand. I’ll never explode Mr. Beast again. Though...he’s kinda already exploded...and I…don’t think I can re-explode him...”
“*deep breath*”
“I’m sorry for my actions, and I want to move on from this and make videos in the future, with my sponsor...with my sponsor...with my...*furious clicking*...I...don’t have a sponsor. I’ve...I’ve been demonetized! No! No, no, no...let me appeal. Let me appeal…”
“*click*”
A cloud appears behind ChronoMaster42, a swirling vortex through which one can see flashes of times from across all of history, across many timelines; it advances on him.
“What – uh, antibodies, you’re not, like, supposed to be in the present! ‘cause it’s not fixed and shit, and -!”
The cloud envelops ChronoMaster42, who screams, a trail of faces screaming into infinity within the cloud as he, and the antibody, vanish. Stream runs for over four hours with a shot of his empty room, until it’s turned off by a sudden power failure.