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@theotheristhedoctor / theotheristhedoctor.tumblr.com

Hannibal Season 3 begins!

This is not an American/non-American thing

This is a CLASS thing

When I (American) went to college (expensive private school on scholarships) (almost everyone there upper middle class or upper class) I and one of my friends (average) incited anger and rejection for asking to ‘tag along’ to the grocery store

They saw it as selfishly asking a favor and were shocked, just like the OOP’s friend, whereas we saw it as a normal and sensible thing to do.

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These lyrics always make me think of the TARDIS and the Doctor’s relationship and feel feelings

“Speed of the Sound of Lonliness” by John Prine:

You come home late and you come home early You come on big when you’re feeling small You come home straight and you come home curly Sometimes you don’t come home at all

So what in the world’s come over you? And what in heaven’s name have you done? You’ve broken the speed of the sound of loneliness You’re out there running just to be on the run

I definitely make spaghetti sauce extremely wrong but I'm not going to stop

Chop 1 onion and put it in a pot.

Add 1 or 2 cans of diced tomatoes. Whatever makes the ratio of onion look right.

Add a ridiculous amount of frozen peas. Peas should make up a notable portion of this sauce.

Add frozen corn also if you wanna be real fancy. If I have bacon, I'll add that too, but I very rarely have bacon.

Cook on HIGH.

While sauce is cooking, grab the nearest bottle of mixed spices that isn't obviously for desserts. Add some. How much? I dunno, enough that you feel like you've added seasoning so it's technically cooking. (For me this is most often a mix called Moroccan, but it could be anything. I've reorganised my kitchen recently so tonight it was something called Pizza Topping.)

If you happen to have green herbs lying around, add those too. Whatever you have on hand that's green.

Let the sauce boil on HIGH until all the water is gone. Stir occasionally so the saucepan will be easier to clean later. Serve on cooked spaghetti noodles with no cheese.

Today I added a new step called "while the sauce is cooking, duck out for 15 seconds to post about spaghetti sauce on Tumblr, then get distracted and forget you are cooking." This adds a novel Extremely Burnt edge to the flavour profile.

I am not Italian, or of Italian descent by *any* stretch of the imagination.

I am also not one of those "cooking purists", who believes that everything must be done in a specific/ traditional way (unless you are making a cooking video with the title "how to make x" in which case if you don't specify mid video that your way is not traditional god help you).

I am a firm believer in "If it tastes good, then it is correct for you".

Except in this case.

This hurts every cooking bone in my body. The latent ancestors in my soul. The judgmental elf in my brain just bit a cyanide capsule.

Why? The spices. Using a different spice mix every time, based on what is ready at hand just ... hurts.

Absolurl I deranged, Derin. Food crimes.

I don't know what sweating the onions means

It means. It means you cook em a little in a pan with a bit of oil first.

A pan? How many dishes do you want me to have to wash here?

I mean you can also do it in the same pot you're making the spaghetti sauce in! The important thing is the onions get a little cooked before the wet stuff goes in, so they're not so wet and limp and boiled....

Honestly this depends entirely on whether I remember to chop an onion first or I find the can opener for the tomatoes first. The ingredients go in in whatever order they go in.

Derin who hurt you

A pack of wild chefs herded my mother off a cliff

Theres probably a hit out on you for this

What kind of stupid idiot would waste money assassinating someone who's so clearly going to accidentally poison themself for free at some point

Of course it's the version I failed to notice I deeply misspelled 'absolutely' that keeps making the rounds where I can see it.

That's the best part

You are a cruel individual, Fish-eater. To me, to your readership(also me), and to the culinary world. Your crimes will be stopped.

I should make this Adin's favourite meal and describe in detail how it's prepared and how everyone on the ship has to eat it

The Very Hungry Rust Monster is a mini-comic I made a few years back. I’ve seen it floating around Tumblr without attribution recently, so I’ve uploaded a higher-resolution version, properly credited.

I hope Barbie is so good and successful it makes every executive that’s turned everything bright and fun made for young girls into edgy boring teen dramas for the last ten years spontaneously combust into flames