Avatar

Memoirs Of The Nerd Queen

@theoneandonlykyna / theoneandonlykyna.tumblr.com

Behold the nerd queen... I have the TARDIS to prove it! I hope to conquer Celiac disease, deployments, and life in general! Come here 2015

I did it!  I freaking did it!  I ran (that's right, I actually ran!) my first half-marathon!

It is crazy to me that only a few years ago I had a handicap placard and could barely walk.  It is amazing what a few years, the right diagnosis, and going gluten free can do.  Never again will I be that sick and I will spend the rest of my life pushing myself to be the healthiest I can possibly be.

So suck it Celiac, I win this time!

I hear i’m too fat to run a half-marathon… 

Six years ago I was in the hospital so sick I thought I was dying.   I could barely walk, I couldn’t eat, I constantly ran fevers and suffered the most excruciating amount of pain you could imagine.  That day the doctor told me that if I was as sick as I said I would he’d be surprised if I saw 30… if it was all in my head then he wished me good luck and I advised me to seek a psychiatrist.  Well it wasn’t in my head it was Celiac disease… which I discovered with absolutely no help of that doctor or hospital.

I’ve been diagnosed and treating my Celiac for over 3 years now.  This past December I turned 30 (Suck it doctor) and decided to run a half marathon.  Mostly because seeing 30 wasn’t a big enough statement. I have my life back and I’m going to prove to myself that i’m capable of anything.

I have been training for 8 weeks and this is it, marathon weekend.  I ran 11 miles without stopping last weekend which is a personal first.  I really think I can do this thing.  And then I came to work today…

So the weather forecast isn’t looking so hot so I jokingly mentioned that if I had pneumonia next week from running a half-marathon in the rain I was sorry.  Then I heard, “wait, you’re running a half-marathon?”  ”Do you know how long that is?”  ”YOU can run?” “You’ve been training?” “seriously?”  All while looking me up and down giving me that look… the look all overweight people recognize… the “you are too fat for that.”  

I gained a tremendous amount of weight before I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease.  I know many people equate Celiac with extreme weight loss but for some its the opposite.  I couldn’t eat but I piled on the pounds. I imagine my body thought it was starving due to the malnourishment.  I couldn’t lose weight for anything.  I had a hard time being taken seriously because, “it didn’t look like I was missing any meals.”   Since going gluten free I have lost about 40 pounds but I still have about 50 to go before I am in a normal healthy weight range.  But here’s the deal, i’m healthy (well as healthy as I can be).  I eat full balanced meals and exercise.  I do everything right and I still struggle with my weight.  I’m not fat because i’m lazy or eat too much.  I’m overweight because i’m fighting Celiac Disease and its going to take a bit longer for me to get where I need to be.  And you know what?  That’s ok because i’m fighting.

People have no idea how hard it is to exercise when you are sick or in pain.  It takes about 3 weeks to start feeling better.  So you know that for 3 weeks it’s going to hurt like hell before you get to the good stuff.  You know how much motivation it takes to put yourself through that?  I promise you, everyone has a story.  Don’t judge them for being overweight, too skinny, too slow, too fast… you have no idea what they have been through and what has brought them to that point in their life.  Why can’t we all be happy we are trying and supportive.  

Autoimmune diseases suck… so much.  I applaud everyone who gets up in the morning because you know what that’s hard.  I applaud everyone who makes it a little bit further each day and refuses to give up… cause that’s brave.

So Sunday when i’m running this thing i’m doing it for me and everyone else out there like me.

And to that woman who just told me I was too fat to run this… Monday morning be ready to see my half-marathon medal.  Boom *mic drop*

This may be my favorite picture of all time :) I got to go to my first ALS graduation. My bf is a supervisor and I couldn't be more excited that both his guys graduated with awards! He is truly remarkable and it was amazing to sit at a table with 5 chiefs and see how impressed they are with him :) it was a great night.

So working on a Valentines project for my boyfriend!  He's in the Air Force and has mentioned how cool it'd be to have some of the WWII nose art.  So I decided to paint them on his beer mugs.

Side note... it's really hard to paint your SO a surprise gift when you live with them.  I keep having to duck and cover when he walks by lol

Nothing like your car crapping out when it's dark and freezing. Looks like my timing belt fell off :/ trying not to panic.... Ok so I'm panicking but trying not to be hysterical. I'm too poor for this...

So after I shared the link to the NBC/Nascar petition on my personal fb page

I got this response from a close friend, “I watched the commercial and I thought it was hilarious. The gluten content was literally one line of the commercial. Is Celiac real? Yes. Is Celiac shitty? Yes. However, I’m a fat guy and if it was a commercial revolving around fat people I’d have laughed too. My sister has RA and I see her laugh at RA stuff all of the time. You gotta be able to laugh at yourself or situations. That commercial is the first thing NASCAR has done well in a long time. You know you’re one of my faves but I think you’re wound up over nothing.” 

Ok couple of things....

Yes, I can laugh at myself.  I often do.  Sometimes you are caught in one of those gluten situations that is just so ridiculous you have to laugh.  But my point is that we are no where near the level of awareness for Celiac Disease and Gluten Intolerance that we can safely joke about this.

This is a Super Bowl ad.. the demographic and sheer numbers of people that will be watching will be insane.  These are the people making our food.  So we are literally putting our health in the hands of people whose only knowledge of gluten free came from NASCAR and TV shows.

I love Nick Offerman, this commercial was very Ron Swanson and I like that shit.  But the "gut check" and quote "When our idea of danger is eating gluten, there's trouble afoot. We the people have gotten soft, America"  feels like a subtle jab that is demolishing all the hard work we are all doing for awareness. I may sound like a hysterical lunatic who is "wound up for nothing" but I couldn't live with myself if I didn't voice my opinion knowing millions are suffering and some even losing this battle.  

Celiac may kill me some day...that is just my reality.  But i'll be damned if I go down without a fight and without calling out all the dick bags that think this disease is a joke.

So this is a lot of work for a banana.  Who am I kidding, i’m training for a half marathon for the medal.  A sweet pirate themed medal of awesomeness.  Usually while running, about mile 6, i’m thinking, “why the fuck did I think 13.1 miles would be easy.”  So far everything hurts, I discovered runner’s stomach and jumper’s knee, and i’m exhausted.   It’s freaking amazing. 

In my early 20’s I was so sick I couldn’t walk without a cane and had a handicap sticker.  I frequented hospitals before diagnosed and I once had a doctor tell me that if I didn’t figure this out he’d be shocked if I made it to 30.  Needless to say undiagnosed Celiac disease kicked my ass.  So even though it sucks it’s really good pain.  On March 1st i’m replacing that handicap placard with a half-marathon medal and i’m going to tell all those doctors to suck it.-BTW I just turned 30 :)  

Wish me luck!