GREAT NEWS EVERYONE. IT’S

they call me mr christmas with the way i jingle your bells 😎

Mothman (to the tune of YMCA)

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imagine if the oceans were replaced by forests and if you went into the forest the trees would get taller the deeper you went and there’d be thousands of undiscovered species and you could effectively walk across the ocean but the deeper you went, the darker it would be and the animals would get progressively scarier and more dangerous and instead of whales there’d be giant deer and just wow

you have a beautiful imagination

Baby chameleons help eliminate fruit flies

(via)

this is a cute video but I cannot emphasize enough that only one of them is helping. the goofball climbing the electrical cable deserves no credit

I am going to eat this entire candy cane.

You’re going to get a cavity

good

30 min later, not much progress. 

Its been an hour. I bit my tongue, my teeth hurts and I’m almost halfway done…

One hour and half done. That’s impressive That takes real skill and perseverance

an hour and a half. my grandma called and I didnt take it so i could eat this… i hate everything

i’d rather be eating anything but this

two and a half hours…. my mouth will never taste normal again

3 fucking hours

I’ve tasted Satans asshole and it tastes like 3 hours of mint. 

Please. Please don’t bring this back.

‘Tis the season.

its almost the season again

Hey y’all. Just an update almost 6 years later, one of my teeth broke off and had to be removed this week. The doctors weren’t sure why but I fucking know.

i feel so bad for nikola tesla like imagine spending years beefing with a guy who has conned the public into believing he's some sort of supergenius when in reality it's his overworked employees developing all of his world-changing inventions and you end up dying broke and starving and alone and then 200 years later another guy cons the public into believing he's some sort of supergenius when in reality it's his overworked employees developing all of his world-changing inventions and he's doing it all IN YOUR NAME. he must be rolling in his grave like a fucking rotisserie chicken

I swear I get sad if I wake up and one is on the floor

They are exploring under the bed! This is normal stuffed animal behavior, as they are trained to protect you from monsters and shadow creatures, so it's natural that they want to keep an eye out. Don't be sad, thank your friend for doing such a good job.

when you find a single flake of glitter on yourself for seemingly no reason. where'd you come from girl. where's the party at

Вместе теплее….

Mushrooms are objectively the funniest thing on gods green earth like this one destroys your liver and kidneys and kills you this one makes a fine cooking oil this one introduces you to the machine elves this one grows in your shower and slowly destroys your lungs this one is delicious in a stir fry. Who else has the range

obsessed with this gif from the wikipedia page for the mercator projection showing actual countries sizes

it's fucked up but i find the concept of "copycat killers" a little funny like you couldn't even think of your own original murder method how embarrassing for you

Other Pokemon Protagonists: Weh I have to be careful, there might be a rat or a small bird in the tall grass!!!

Pokemon Colosseum Protagonist:

Two guys who are gay and a matching set but they’re NOT dating just gay . and always hanging out around each other

if being hard on yourself worked, it would have worked by now