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A Blog With Sturf

@the1337chef

A dork that wants to make video games.

Tumblr, buddy, listen to me. This is an unprecedented opportunity. You can snap up all of the pie here, and become defacto internet goodguy easy. All you gotta do is... drop the nsfw ban. Unambiguously. Announce that dicks are back on the menu. You want people subscribed the blogs? You want people to actually use your Post+ function? Porn. Let us use it for porn. The youngins aren't joining this site anyway, you're not competing with tiktok. The vaguely horny 20-40 demographic though? You can have that. You can have all of that. Think about it.

Do you know how many pinup artists alone are itching to come back to tumblr, but dont because of the unclear, seemingly arbitrary application of your nsfw policy? These are insanely talented people who are practically begging to give you content. For free. But you gotta change the policy. We can't keep dancing around this. Just think of publicity. The drama. A complete 180. You'd kill it tumblr. You could make it happen. Please.

Twitter is, officially, unironically, dead.

Early today, almost everyone was having trouble viewing anything on Twitter. Eventually Elon tweeted this: viewing limits for all users.

Verified accounts - people who buy Twitter Blue - are limited to reading 6,000 posts per day. Unverified accounts can only read 600, and new unverified accounts only 300. He later updated the numbers to 8,000, 800, and 400 respectively, but the impact is the same. And if you're not logged in, you can't see any tweets at all.

This isn't even interacting with posts, such as liking, replying, retweeting, or quote-tweeting. This is viewing. The one basic interaction required to use any social media site.

Elon Musk is clawing back every basic feature and pushing a pay-to-win scheme onto everyone still on the site. And what do you get if you pay? You get to be in a club filled with the most vile, racist, queerphobic losers on the internet who invest their money into crypto, NFTs, and all sorts of lousy scams. No sensible person is going to pay for that.

Once upon a time, Twitter was a fabulous hub for at-the-moment developments. If there was breaking news somewhere in the world, you could know it within minutes. It gradually became a general hub for people of all walks of life, from artists, activists, politicians, everyday ordinary people.

Now it's just a place where you pay $8 to lick Elon Musk's shoe.

To quote a good friend of mine:

Oh I see so it's not that the person who made it was cultivating the strangest vibe possible for the grimace birthday playlist it's that they put every song ever on it

The word "faggot" appears in the lyrics on this playlist multiple times. Dead Kennedy's are on here.

I cannot. Stress. Enough. It is on the grimace birthday playlist.

IT IS ON. THE GRIMACE. BIRTHDAY PLAYLIST.

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a little to the left: cute little casual game where you solve puzzles while tidying up the house! perfect for a nice, relaxing evening! watch out for the kitty!

me:

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On twitter.... if you look at more than 600 posts a day you can't look at tweets anymore. And if you make a post that's too funny, you risk temporary suspension

Years ago I overheard (eavesdropped upon) a telephone conversation between a public parks official and a golf course owner.

Parks Official: No sir, you cannot

Parks Official: No. They are a protected species

Parks Official: You CANNOT shoot them

Parks Official: Or poison them, no. Or trap them

Parks Official: If you like, we can-- no, I'm it. I'm the ranking official here. There's nobody above me. My boss? You mean... the governor's office? Sure, I guess. Okay bye

After he hung up, he gave me this thousand-yard stare before answering my unvoiced question.

"There's a flock of flamingos at the 9th green disrupting golfers. He wanted permission to go out there with a shotgun and take care of matters, but sensed there might be... legal ramifications. So he called us."

I laughed. "Does that happen often?"

"Oh, we get calls like that a couple times a month."

Country clubs should be burned to the ground and their golf courses turned into community gardens i am 10000% serious

Was golf created for the sole purpose of hoarding ridiculously large amounts of land just to brag about how little they use it?

Yes, literally.