@the-scottish-costume-guy / the-scottish-costume-guy.tumblr.com
Portals to Hell by hrmphfft
IT’S BACK
I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS AGAIN FOR MONTHS
I AM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW
ITS BACK
This is one of those posts that you need to save and tag or you’ll never see it again for 84 years.
hey guys look…i found one of those iconic viral Tumblr posts
I don't know what it says about my current mental state that I am laughing uncontrollably at this
Talking meaning chatting online, interacting irl, or even exchanging one or two messages. I just want to see how much tumblr users actually talk to each other!
BUDDY you're a BOY you're a BIG BIG BOY you're a BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG BOY you got mud on your face you BIG BIG BOY kicking your can all over the place singing WEE wee WEE wee WEE wee WEE wee
suzanne collins is such a genius... the cultural phenomena of her series leading to the hanging tree house remixes, mockingjay being milked for two (bad) movies, the capitol-inspired makeup palettes, the halloween costumes, the explosion of the market for dystopia, the butchering of her characters and removal of disabilities, disfiguration, and racial tension + representation to sell more tickets, the extra gale scenes to fuel discourse, and the audience showing up to cinemas to watch what was pretty honestly marketed to them (the jacob vs edwardification of the symbolic love story and also to watch children fight to the death) it's just so ridiculously ironic i would say you can't write this shit, but she did write about it... in The Hunger Games published 2008
Researcher and doctorate @NoraEpstein on Twitter just posted a video of the new tattoo she got commemorating her PhD.
And… she footnoted the artwork, with a literal footnote 😂 I love this so much
This was so interesting I love yuval
there was a poem published in the goddamn 1920s, called "The Chaos," written by a Dutch speaker and its sole purpose is to make fun of how difficult English is to learn because of how many different ways the same set of words can be pronounced and how many different spellings are pronounced the same way.
in English, "pronouncing something the wrong way because you've only ever read it and never heard it spoken" is insanely common even for native speakers. (for me, "colonel" and "indict" are the worst; I pronounced them phonetically for years in my head before I found out they're actually pronounced "KERN-null" and "in-DITE") there is a goddamn meme about how we don't know how "gif" is properly pronounced because "g" can either be hard, like in "gift," or soft, like in "giraffe."
it is much less common in other languages, especially very standardized ones where you know for a fact that this letter combination is always pronounced this specific way; like, you could give me a book in German and I might not understand most of it, but I could probably read it aloud fairly well because German has a very standardized spelling.
this is partially because of how English is actually a bunch of other languages in a trench coat (our grammar is German! like a third of our vocabulary is French! "COT" AND "BANDANA" ARE HINDI LOANWORDS!)
the lack of consistency in English in spelling and pronunciation is by far the most common complaint I have heard from non-native speakers. I think the phrase my dad used is "English is easy to learn but impossible to master." it is frankly incredibly small-minded to assume that your language is easy to learn, just because it's easy to you.
Carlotta from Phantom of the Opera gets a raw deal! She refuses to perform until the theatre stops racking up OSHA violations and using her star power to effect change when anyone else on that stage would get fired!! Justice for Carlotta, who just wants safe working conditions!!
Sometimes, Andrew Lloyd Webber writes op eds about how those greedy theatre unions are ruining Broadway (by driving operating costs too high), and his stance on Carlotta really makes sense.
this is also funny but very depressing, the funniest thing is he’s also said multiple times that he loves comics and superheroes he just doesn’t like the industry or some fans inability to criticize the stories in it
The very excited blonde lady owns the resort where this is taken. She’s super excited because this is the closest they’ve ever come in before. Everyone else is less excited because this was taken crack of dawn; when blonde lady realized how close the whales were coming, she ran around waking everybody up to see it.
A good, wholesome post.
i feel like people need to know about the absolute decadence of that one weird tesco express in bournemouth
what the fuck is actually going on
yeah im at the catholic guilt tesco express do you want anything?
anime twunk slade in my adventures with superman is so funny to me and I think people who definitely do not read or think about deathstroke getting mad at it made me like it more lmao cause it made me realize a very silly detail
it’s a story about Clark starting out as Superman so everyone is younger than their comic counterparts. That means that this young, but still clearly Adult Man’s actual arch-nemesises are currently kindergarteners, still with their parents at the circus or a few years from turning green. Which. just very funny in general.
It also means, I realized, that he still has both eyes. This is Slade early in his mercenary career, seemingly post experimentation but pre eyeloss. Which is a very specific time period in his backstory that means he has a very funny trait for an edgy floppy-banged white-haired anime man:
He is currently married but (not by his choice) absolutely not going to stay that way.
it turns out about to be divorced is literally the funniest possible characteristic for a shonen villain to Me. I literally can’t stop calling him pre-divorce era Slade.
Oooo he’s edgy he’s dangerous he’s about to get shot in the face by his (absolutely justified) wife.
This man has at least one possibly two very young sons at home. He’s currently fighting Superman to avoid parenting. He is not going to get visitation rights and he Will be dodging child support payments.
Will they change it and make his eye related to Superman for narrative reasons, not covering his family stuff? I hope not but possibly. Until that happens though Schrödinger’s pathetic loser here having two eyes means his wife divorcing him is literally always impending.
GQ published this, got a phone call, and killed it, but someone had already archived it, so...
Time to make sure lots and lots of people see it!
gosh it sure would be a shame if everyone read this…
That link isn’t working for me for some reason, so here’s another.
"Zaslav later issued a statement thanking BU for the invitation, and insisting, “as I have often said, I am immensely supportive of writers and hope the strike is resolved soon and in a way that they feel recognizes their value.” But he had been humiliated, openly and unapologetically, and while he was duly kowtowed after the fact—BU President Robert Brown publicly apologized for the incident, blaming it on “cancel culture”—he must’ve wondered, somewhere in the back of his mind, how it had come to this."
The article, for everyone whose links are mysteriously broken:
It must have been quite a shock to the captain of industry—standing at the lectern at his alma matter, resplendent in his red-and-black graduation regalia—when he realized the Boston University Class of 2023 was booing him. David Zaslav, president and CEO of Warner Bros. Discovery, was delivering the commencement address, recalling how the late General Electric CEO Jack Welch once told him, “If you want to be successful, you’re going to have to figure out how to get along with everyone—and that includes difficult people.”
But instead of listening to his pearls of wisdom, the students were heckling him. Others had turned their backs to the stage. Now more were chanting, “Pay your writers,” as Zaslav, a studio head, was one of the oft-invoked villains of the striking Writers Guild of America.
He tried to press on with his story, continuing to quote Welch: “Some people will be looking for a fight.” The booing continued.
Zaslav later issued a statement thanking BU for the invitation, and insisting, “as I have often said, I am immensely supportive of writers and hope the strike is resolved soon and in a way that they feel recognizes their value.” But he had been humiliated, openly and unapologetically, and while he was duly kowtowed after the fact—BU President Robert Brown publicly apologized for the incident, blaming it on “cancel culture”—he must’ve wondered, somewhere in the back of his mind, how it had come to this.
In a relatively short period of time, David Zaslav has become perhaps the most hated man in Hollywood. Few people who weren’t industry insiders even knew his name two years ago, when Discovery merged with WarnerMedia to become Warner Bros. Discovery. Zaszlav had been CEO of Discovery Communications since 2006, where he oversaw the transition from, in his words, “no longer a cable company, (but) a content company.” What that meant, from a viewer’s perspective, was Discovery’s transition from educational programming to reality slop—which is, of course, a much more lucrative business model.
In his (slight) defense, there were considerable challenges awaiting the CEO of the new Warner Bros. Discovery conglomerate, whomever that might have been. Warner Bros. had, like most motion picture studios, struggled considerably during the pandemic. Their decision to simultaneously stream their entire 2021 theatrical slate on the HBOMax streaming service upset other filmmakers, including those whose films were impacted by it (and theatrical chains as well). One example? Christopher Nolan, who’s enormously profitable relationship with WB began back in 2002, was so pissed that he took his new film Oppenheimer to Universal out of frustration by the company’s poor handling of his 2020 feature Tenet.
In retrospect, the right person for the job of healing those wounds and reestablishing relationships with filmmakers might not have been the guy best known for shepherding the likes of Naked and Afraid, Dr. Pimple Popper, and My 600-lb Life. And, to be fair, figures from the world of reality TV are often seen with suspicion, if not outright snobbery, by those responsible for scripted fare. But Zaslav did himself no favors, and did little to blur that binary, when announcing the merger of the HBOMax and Discovery+ streaming services in a quarterly earnings call—which included a much-derided infographic deeming HBOMax’s scripted programming as “male skew,” “appointment viewing,” and “lean in” (?), while Discovery+’s unscripted shows were “female skew” “comfort viewing,” and thus ”lean back” (?!?).
More distressingly, in that same call, Zaslav announced that two nearly completed films that had been greenlit and produced under the previous regime for streaming on HBOMax—the DC superhero story Batgirl and the family sequel Scoob!: Holiday Haunt—would not be distributed on the platform or released in theaters. Instead, they would be essentially wiped from existence and used as a tax-write down.
Eagle-eyed subscribers subsequently noted that several other Max originals, including the Seth Rogen comedy An American Pickle and Robert Zemeckis’s remake of The Witches, had been quietly removed from the service, in a further attempt to save money. The service proceeded to remove several dozen series from its library, from HBO originals like Westworld and Vinyl to family programming like The Not-Too-Late Show with Elmo to animated series like Infinity Train. Even episodes of Sesame Street weren’t safe. Several other streaming services, including Paramount+, Starz, Showtime, Disney+ and Hulu, have followed suit, disappearing their underperforming originals for tax purposes, creating giant swaths of shockingly recent yet bafflingly “lost” media.
Meanwhile, the merger of the HBOMax and Discovery+ services continued apace, with a bizarre rebranding to simply “Max,” consciously choosing to remove its most prestigious and identifiable piece of branding. (It was akin to Disney+ renaming itself “Plus.”) It was almost as if the reality-skewing CEO was ashamed of the streamer’s affiliation with high-quality, high-profile scripted programming—a perception further confirmed when Max launched in May.On the “details” tab for film and shows on the service’s new interface, writers, directors, and producers, no matter how they’re credited in the work in question, are lumped together (in no particular order) under the nebulous designation of “creators.” (That means, for example, that according to Max, the film Raging Bull was “created” by Peter Savage, Martin Scorsese, Mardik Martin, Robert Chartoff, Paul Schrader, Jake La Motta, Irwin Winkler, and Joseph Carter.) A joint statement from the Director’s Guild of America and the Writer’s Guild of America West criticized the “unilateral decision by Warner Bros. Discovery to change the long-standing individual credits of directors and writers in the new rollout of Max.” Max quickly promised to “correct the credits, which were altered due to an oversight in the technical transition from HBO Max to Max.” More than a month later, the “oversight” has not been corrected.
That backlash, however, was nothing compared to what happened recently. In mid-June, Warner Bros Discovery cut loose five of the most senior executives (“the people who’ve been the architect of the brand for decades,” according to one insider) at Turner Classic Movies, the cable network beloved among cinephiles—and high-profile filmmakers. Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorsese, and Paul Thomas Anderson quickly released a statement, noting, “Turner Classic Movies has always been more than just a channel. It is truly a precious resource of cinema, open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. And while it has never been a financial juggernaut, it has always been a profitable endeavor since its inception.” And while they insisted Zaslav had assured them “that TCM and classic cinema are very important to him,” subsequent reporting indicated that TCM’s staff had been cut from 90 employees to a skeletal 20.
Nearly lost in the hullabaloo was yet another of the company’s exhaustive attempts to squeeze a profit from its assets: a $500 million deal to sell around half of their film and TV-music library. In a perhaps too-good-to-be-true detail, the sale would reportedly include “As Time Goes By” from Casablanca—the musical fanfare that plays before every Warner Bros. feature film.
Barely a month ago, Graydon Carter was hosting a party in Zaslav’s honor at Cannes, all but crowning him as the heir apparent to Jack Warner. But there’s a crucial difference between Zaslav and the old-school moguls he’s attempting to emulate: They loved movies, and cared about filmmakers. Zaslav sees movies as “content,” sees filmmakers as “content creators,” and is only interested in maintaining, preserving, and presenting “content” that can make him and his stockholders a quick buck. Anything that doesn’t, he’ll happily gut. He’s closer to Logan Roy than Jack Warner and there is a genuine, understandable fear that his bean-counting represents not just shrugging indifference but outright hostility to cinema and its rich history.
In Pretty Woman, Richard Gere stars as Edward Lewis, a corporate raider who buys companies “that are in financial difficulty” and sells off their pieces. “So it's sort of like stealing cars and selling them for the parts, right?” asks call girl Vivian (Julia Roberts), when he explains what he does, and it’s hard not to think of Lewis when looking over Zaslav’s reign at Warner Bros Discovery, stepping into the distressed conglomerate and stripping it for parts.
Edward Lewis, however, is at least honest about what he does. “You don't make anything,” Vivian notes, and he agrees; “You don’t build anything,” she continues, and he concurs with that as well. And perhaps that’s why David Zaslav is earning a concerning reputation so far. He’s out here carrying on like a mogul, but based on his performance to date, he’s only good at breaking things.
incredibly telling that this asshole would be quoting the even bigger gaping asshole named Jack Welch. Of the men directly responsible for the modern corporate culture of "making a few millions short term is always worth it, even if you end up ruining entire towns or countries to do it"
Tiny round rain frog wakes up, yawns, rubs his eyes, then squeezes himself into his tiny hole
fucking amazing content
“the most animal” is like a nonsense meme phrase but this is really the most animal. It’s a round spot in the world with the face and legs a baby could draw. If you couldn’t remember what an animal was your brain would conjure this vision as the blurry recollection.
shoutout to the lord of the rings lighting directors. bold move to let the audience see what's going on in nighttime scenes. i miss that.
are you really gonna be scared of a man with hat hair?
or I guess, uh... mask hair?
s... 🤔
. . . sack hair . . . ?
Here's THE masterpost of free and full adaptations, by which I mean that it's a post made by the master.
Anthony and Cleopatra: here's the BBC version
Coriolanus: Here's a college play, here's the 1984 telefilm, here's the 2014 one with tom hiddleston
Hamlet: The Kenneth Branagh 1996 Hamlet is here, the 1964 russian version is here and the 1964 american version is here. THe 1964 Broadway production is here, the 1948 Laurence Olivier one is here. And the 1980 version is here. Here are part 1 and 2 of the 1990 BBC adaptation. Have the 2018 Almeida version here.
Henry V: Laurence Olivier (who would have guessed) 1944 version. The 1989 Branagh version here. The BBC version is here.
King Lear: Laurence Olivier once again plays in here. And Gregory Kozintsev, who was I think in charge of the russian hamlet, has a king lear here. The 1975 BBC version is here. The Royal Shakespeare Compagny's 2008 version is here. The 1974 version with James Earl Jones is here.
Macbeth: here's the 1961 one with Sean Connery. Here's the 1971 by Roman Polanski, with spanish subtitles. Here's the 1948 www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljZrf_0_CcQ">here. The 1988 BBC onee with portugese subtitles and here the 2001 one). The 1969 radio one with Ian McKellen and Judi Dench is here and the 1966 BBC version is here. The Royal Shakespeare Compagny's 2008 version is here.
Measure for Measure: BBC version here.
The Merchant of Venice: here's a stage version, here's the 1980 movie, here the 1973 Lawrence Olivier movie, here's the 2004 movie.
The Merry Wives of Windsor: the Royal Shakespeare Compagny gives you this movie.
Much Ado About Nothing: Here is the kenneth branagh version and here the Tennant and Tate 2011 version. Here's the 1984 version.
Othello: A Massachussets Performance here, the 2001 movie her is the Orson Wells movie with portuguese subtitles theree, and a fifteen minutes long lego adaptation here. THen if you want more good ole reliable you've got the BBC version here and there.
Richard II: here is the BBC version
Richard III: here's the 1955 one with Laurence Olivier, and here's the 1995 one with Ian McKellen. (the 1995 one is in english subtitled in spanish. the 1955 one has no subtitles and might have ads since it's on youtube)
Romeo and Juliet: here's the 1988 BBC version.
The Taming of the Shrew: the 1988 BBC version here, the 1929 version here, some Ontario stuff here and here is the 1967 one with Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor.
Timon of Athens: here is the 1981 movie with Jonathan Pryce,
Troilus and Cressida can be found here
Titus Andronicus: the 1999 movie with Anthony Hopkins here
Twelfth night: here for the BBC, herefor the 1970 version with Alec Guinness, Joan Plowright and Ralph Richardson.
The Winter's Tale: the BBC version is here
Please do contribute if you find more. This is far from exhaustive.
(also look up the original post from time to time for more plays)
