count yourself lucky

nobody is coming to save you. get up

That cat is absolutely an orphan-generating coal baron. The mustache and top-hat are there in spirit, if not actually. Legally, that cat's name should be Reacher Gilt.

Apparently this comment got screenshotted, escaped containment, and made its way back to the owner of the cat who found me.

Hew name is Lucy, she is well-loved, and she just looks like that all the time:

12,000 people harmonizing Hey Jude at Pentatonix concert in Des moines

Incredible! Gives me hope that there could be peace on earth

Serious goosebumps

#okay when they all got loud i choked up#i am not immune to the harmony of the masses

Dragon AGE 2

I don't think I could be trusted with shapeshifting powers bc I would just turn into a bear and attack things with my claws at any minor inconvenience. it would be my go-to solution for everything

caving as an extreme sport is sooo unfathomable to me why are u as a creature of the daylight doing that. were u born without the dread in ur bones or something

I am the REGRET of a GOD, YOU-

I’m cry I scored 60, I feel blind

these are all the same exact color . what

I got a perfect score and very very few people did in the notes so you’re telling me when I ANGUISH over picking exactly the ideal color nobody can tell?! Because even between those four examples right here I’d probably spend several minutes adjusting my art until it’s precisely the one I want (the third one is my favorite)

literally amy dunne's entire problem was that she didn't have enough enrichment in her enclosure. and that was ON NICK.

like maybe if you are married to an apex predator do not make her move to missouri bro

i dont bite people anymore. but i did as a child cos i thought i was a werepuppy. also i was still mormon so i would go into the school bathroom at 11:11 everyday (not a mormon thing i was just obsessed with witches n pretended i was one in 5th grade) and pray that god would turn me into a little dog so i could stop going to school. and i was always like "if you don't turn me into a little dog i will STOP BELIEVING IN YOU" and he didn't so i did.

i think i even complained to my mom like "you said god will always answer my prayers but he hasn't turned me into a dog yet so??? bullshit" and she was like "oh honey 😊 god🌞 works in ✨mysterious✨ ways, and He🌞 knows whats best for you...turning you into a dog🐕 isnt the path🛣️ He🌞 has set for you🙏😚" and i was like. well that sucks i hate him

anyway im into petplay now

Jaime Sabines

Blep

(via)

Ran into my seventeen year old brother in the kitchen at 1am last night and when I asked him what he was doing he just shrugged, said “these are my roaming hours,” and walked off strumming vaguely on his guitar

i stand with hayseed

“Not only does he work as a barrier, but I utilize Hayseed as a weapon of war. I have specialized my character to take all perks related to horseback damage. That is largely redundant, because I just charge at people and trample them under Hayseed’s big powerful hooves.

Despite all of this, Hayseed is a friend. Look at those placid, beautiful eyes. Hayseed is just a large lad who doesn’t know any better, and he must be protected.

Unfortunately, my posse disagrees with me. I catch them throwing molotovs at Hayseed while he gambols in a field. One time, I got off my horse to hogtie my good friend Matt for chuckles, and his brother Jake jumped on Hayseed’s back, gave a peal of joyous laughter, and immediately ran Hayseed off the nearest cliff. To Jake’s horror, while he died upon the jagged rocks, Hayseed survived the fall and got up. I gave him oatcakes, brushed his beautiful mane, and whispered apologies in his ear.

I love you, Hayseed.”

HEROES NEVER DIE

If they just let people burn the goat it wouldn’t be a good ritual sacrifice. People that burn the goat are legitimately risking jailtime but they do it anyway. That’s what makes the goatburning so powerful.

#it must be an even battle between the primordial forces of order#and every drunk asshole with a lighter and a bottle of vodka on the planet

FATHER FEED ME

not writing, not not writing, but a secret third thing

letting my stories spin around my head like a microwave

currently