Avatar

Idiot in hiding

@the-hidden-idiot

Avatar

*places an orange just outside a fairy ring to see what comes out* science is more of an art than a science

*the orange grows legs and skitters away*

Fascinating results *places a banana in the same spot*

*clawed hand reaches out of the ether and drags it into the ring, leaving ragged claw marks in the soil as it disappears, back into the ether from whence it came*

“let’s go to the extreme.” *places a pineapple in the same spot*

Real scientists would keep putting an orange in the same spot to make sure the results are consistent before moving on to other fruits or different spots.

The only valid response to this post.

We’re working up the complexity levels of fruit until we feel there is enough evidence to support the judicious placement of a volunteer twink

You sit down, we haven’t seen what’s happened to the pineapple

Avatar

When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.

I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.

One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.

The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?

The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”

I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.

It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.

Avatar
dietspam16
Avatar
reblogged
Avatar
latinotiktok

nuevo post de conexión entre latines: den rt y sigan a todos los que dieron rt o si no

Qué carajo es un RT, cipayo de mierda?

callate das clases en escuela privada

Estoy adoctrinando para que defiendan a la universidad pública, sorete, vos que estás haciendo por el país?

PERO SI LA MAYORIA DE TUS ALUMNES VOTARON A MILEI que adoctrinamiento choto

FAKE NEWS ESOS ERAN LOS DE ECO QUE FUERON 5 GATOS LOCOS Y NINGUNO FUE A VOTAR PORQUE LES DIO PAJA

ASI QUE DAS FAKE NEWS SEGUN TE CONVIENE????

Avatar
asteorito
Avatar
Avatar
squidcrimes

"don't go grocery shopping when hungry" doesn't work for me because Not Hungry Me cannot conceive of a universe in which food is needed so she buys like a cup of pomegranate seeds and some fancy cheese and thinks that'll get us through the week.

FUN FACT the scientist who said that made it the fuck up! he's also the same dude who said that if kids made eye contact with the character on food boxes they wanted it more. so now all the cereal mascots/kids mascots look downwards to a child height. but THEY MADE IT UP and it's allllllll bullshit and bad science to the point cornell deleted the fuckin cereal eyes study from the face of the earth and modern research is saying you SHOULD shop when ur hungry because it makes you put more value on food that would give you more nutrition and actually sharpens your ability to feed yourself well

So I think the cereal box guy was Brian Wansink and honestly that tracks. If Wansink thinks we should be grocery shopping when full then we should definitely be doing it when hungry. Bruh is an absolute joke.

THAT'S THE BASTARD

IT'S HIM

imagine being so bad at science that your university forces you to stop

things he also came up with that are BULLSHIT:

  • eating around fat people makes you eat more junk food??? (wtf?)
  • portion sizes affecting how hungry you feel
  • "if you are served second portions you are more likely to take seconds"
  • the entire concept of mini and fun-sized portion sizes (based in fatphobia btw!)
  • the idea of boredom eating and stress eating being bad for you and not normal
  • the idea of eating in front of a screen being terrible for your digestion
  • that julia child's cooking was trying to make you fat (based on 18 of 4500 recipes...)
  • the idea of western food being unhealthy
  • the cereal eyes thing
  • the shopping while hungry thing
  • and much much more!

also he committed kickstarter fraud in 2018 and is a massive fatphobe who thinks fat people recruit others to become fat by just existing. fuck him lmao

Look at all the overlap in that list with pro-ed pro-ana rhetoric.

And the "wellness" communities and pro-wld community just ran with it.

This guy needs his tires slashed every day for the rest of his life.

Avatar
Avatar
wariocompany

Can't decide whether it's funnier to say "my hungry ass could never work at a" and then say something that implies you're eating something truly grotesque or something that just, makes no sense

"my hungry ass could never be a brain surgeon" awful. 10/10

"my hungry ass could never be a truck driver" ????? 10/10

Avatar
yanoharuhito

EATYIGNIN TIJOK;L'HE????

Avatar

hey guys yeah sorry i can't actually hang out today i felt a little sad earlier and have to maintain it like a performance for the rest of the day or else i might think i made it up. because that makes sense you know

Avatar

many problems are caused by the mindset that the world is divided into good people and bad people and the bad people can be "found out" and removed, eventually leading to a utopia containing only good people.

Avatar
reblogged
Avatar
cryptotheism

I remember reading a description of Ghengis Khan's yurt as "palatial" and that stuck with me. I've never even seen a normal yurt. My mind cannot even imagine a palatial yurt. I bet it fucked hard.

Avatar
Community Label: Mature: Sexual Themes
Image
Image

Prostitute

In-game NPC art for The Elder Scrolls II: Daggerfall

*Artist Unknown* If you know the artist, comment below

Me: surely they won't put an absurd and semi-pointless amount of detail into a gratuitously detailed nude body in The Elder Scrolls II: Daggerfall

A Bethesda artist in 1995:

Community Label: Mature

Sexual themes