i’ve got a real question: why is it the accepted norm that snape was obsessed with lily?
like people toss that shit around like it’s established fact. “oh, snape was obsessed with lily so he did xyz” and “does it really matter if snape did xyz because he was obsessed with lily.” where in the goddamn text are you guys getting that snape is obsessed with lily?
snape as a child is focused on lily - but honestly, it very much reads in the way shy children hyperfocus on someone they want to be friends with. i was this kid and i’ve done snape’s routine of circling around someone i want to talk to to try and check out what the situation is or gather up my courage. that’s not “obsessive” behavior, that’s…. kid behavior? idk people see 9yo snape as this little creep, but it’s difficult for me to see because scoping out people before chancing to talk to them seems uh… pretty natural to me lmao. esp since snape would be taking a pretty huge risk revealing the wizarding world to someon ehe isn’t entirely sure is a witch too.
snape as a teenager is dependent on lily because, as far as we can see, she’s his only real friend - but he’s also capable of respecting her boundaries, listening to her wishes, and cultivating a real bond with her. that’s not possible if it’s just “obsession.” like yeah, he sticks around and tries to get her to hear his apology but the moment she makes it clear she doesn’t want him around, he leaves. wanting her to hear his apology isn’t obsessive or stalker-y; that’s a friend who did a shit thing wanting to make up for it. and when he realizes lily doesn’t accept it, he accepts that.
snape as an adult has a metaphor of lily as his patronus. that doesn’t mean he’s obsessed with lily. it means he loved lily. idk why people suddenly decided that patroni are somehow a symbol of obsession but that idea really falls apart when you look at other people’s patroni; is harry obsessed with james because his patronus is prongs? is tonks obsessed with lupin because her patronus is moony? the patronus charm is one of the biggest metaphors in the novel for pure, honest love and protection and it’s really, really fucking annoying that snape’s is the only one that gets twisted into being “proof” of his “gross obsession.” hey. hey. just because you don’t like snape or don’t support snape and lily doesn’t change the meaning of what a patronus is you numbfucks. snape’s patronus is no more sick or gross than harry’s or tonks’s.
an obsessive man wouldn’t leave lily alone after she asks him to. an obsessive man wouldn’t accept lily’s marriage to someone else. an obsessive man wouldn’t go to dumbledore to risk his life for the life of lily’s family. there’s literally zero textual evidence or even strong analysis for snape feeling anything other than love and regret for lily much in the same vein as what sirius and remus feel for james. (remember how they nearly murdered a guy to avenge james? and yet no one goes around accusing lupin or sirius of being obsessive lmao.)
this pervasive idea that snape is an obsessive stalker is so deeply-entrenched in fandom, but honestly it’s based on really loosely analyzed fanon with very little strong evidence to back it up. any invested reading of the text immediately makes it fall apart.